Everything Changes- Part II

PLEASE READ PART 1 BEFORE CONTINUING. THIS IS ALSO A ROUGH DRAFT. THANK YOU.
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I spent the day with my mother and Michah in front of the fireplace in my living room watching television.

I sent Lee a message on my phone apologizing for bailing on him the day before and asked if we were "cool". He never replied. I sent the message to him early this morning and it was already late afternoon. The snow was still falling heavily outside the house and the roads were iced over. I kept checking my phone until I finally gave it up as a bad job and left it on the coffee table. I was still mad at Lee but I wanted to make amends after our disagreement. After all, he'd been my best friend since elementary school. We were almost brothers and it bothered me slightly that something so inconsequential would cause a rift. I certainly hoped not.

I hadn't looked at Michah since the latest news reports about the blizzard in our region, but he did take my hand and hold it underneath the blankets the three of us were pile under. My mother had made us all some hot chocolate, but Michah and I hadn't touched ours yet. I was afraid that if I let go of his hand to reach for my mug he would disappear from my side. I was also wary of my mother next to me, lest she glimpse our locked fingers if the blankets fell away.

His hands were small and warm. He kept playing with my fingers, running his fingertips over my knuckles and on the inside of my palm. I tried memorizing every crease of his skin, every indention of his fingerprints. Occasionally he'd squeeze my hand gently as if he wanted me to know he enjoyed this little game we were playing under the nose of my mother. I looked over at her several times to see her eyes fixed on the television in contentment. The light reflected off her face as she watched the news anchor give another update about the weather conditions and I knew she was just happy to spend time with me and, by extension, Michah, whom she had grown quite fond of since I began bringing him over to our house for the biology project and the dinners that followed.

But I was still frightened by the prospect of her finding out there was something more going on between the two teenage boys sitting on her couch. Surely she thought we were just friends. Hell, even I thought we were just friends. I must be wrong.

I felt his fingers trail from my palm to my wrist and circle back again. Goosebumps erupted on my arm and traveled through my body. It was like lightning, it happened so quickly. I felt a tingly feeling in my stomach that radiated down to my hips and thighs.

I closed my eyes and tried to think of gruesome and horrible things, but it was no use. I was soon fully erect and mortified. Shit, my mother is sitting right next to me! Yet at the same time, I was excited and silently begging for his hand to find it's way to my lap underneath the covers.

Suddenly I realized what he was doing. He was teasing me.

None of the girls I've slept with have ever teased me before. There was never any fore-play. Not that it was their fault. I'm was just a jack-ass looking for a quick fix. They were all drunk. And...oh!

His fingers left mine and I felt his hand slowly, carefully, maneuvering it's way across the strap of my pants to my crotch. He found me at full mast. All systems go, I couldn't help but think. I didn't dare move. I don't think I even breathed. His hand wavered slightly and I chanced looking at him. His dark blonde hair was still slightly messy from sleep last night. His long eyelashes framed his curious and slightly fearful eyes. He looked up at me and I could see the question on his face, the disbelief. I wanted him to know I was confused. I wanted him to know that I was frightened. I wanted him to know I wanted him and I didn't know what the hell I was doing or why. I wanted to throw him over my shoulder and march him upstairs to my room. I wanted him to know that, yes, I was rock hard for him. I wanted him on his knees, to feel his mouth on my cock and see his eyes staring up at me. I wanted to tear his clothes off and toss him over the edge of my bed.

I was having trouble keeping still with his hand curiously exploring my inner thigh. I needed to take deep breaths to calm my body down. I was fighting a losing battle.

"I need some water," Michah said politely and walked through the dining room and disappeared into the kitchen, leaving me to deal with the abrupt absence of his closeness. I cleared my throat and followed him, leaving my mother immersed in the broadcast. She didn't even look away from the television.

Michah had his back turned toward me as he tried to reach a cup from the cupboard next to the dishwasher.

"So you really are thirsty?" I asked. He jumped but didn't turn around.

"Yes," he replied and then resumed trying to reach a cup.

I walked over behind him and easily retrieved a ceramic mug, setting it down on the counter top in front of him.

"Why did you leave me in there?" I asked, keeping my voice down to a whisper. I still had a massive erection and I couldn't help but move closer until my belly was pressed against his back. I rested my chin on the top of his head and gently wrapped my arms around him.

He shrugged and I could feel a sigh issue forth.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't want things to get too... heated. It was getting a little weird with your mom being in the same room," he whispered back.

"Yeah. That was a bit fucking creepy, thanks," I said.

He giggled.

"You looked like you were about to panic," he said. I knew if I had the ability to blush my face would be deep red.

"It's you're fault. I was just trying to watch the constant news coverage about the blizzard. It was interesting and you ruined it." I smiled.

Michah had another fit of giggles and, in response, swished his hips back and forth across my crotch. I groaned and pressed my lips hard against his neck. The lightning substance began pumping through my body and I knew that before long, if I had my way, nothing was going to stop me from giving him exactly what I wanted.

"Can I ask you something?" he whispered. He turned around in my arms and leaned against the counter.

"Anything," I answered in a husky voice.

He smiled slightly but looked apprehensive.

"Are you gay? I mean, I know you kissed me and now this. But I never thought you were like that."

I tried to keep a cool head but my mind began buzzing with confusion as it did before. No, I'm not gay! I don't know what this means! Does everyone think I'm gay? Am I really homosexual?

"I don't know. I don't think so. But I do like you... like that. I mean, I like girls. I always have. I don't think that's changed," I answered tentatively. The rush in my veins was subsiding.

He nodded as if I had confirmed something.

"Don't worry, you aren't a fag. I don't think so anyway. Bisexual, probably. But not gay," he explained, running his hand across my chest. For some reason, I felt a small wave of relief.

"That means I'm attracted to girls and boys, right?" It didn't sound so bad when I said it aloud.

He nodded. It made sense. I was still scared and a little confused, but this was some sort of explanation I could hang on to in this new discovery.

"But I've never been attracted to any other guys as far as I know. No crushes, nothing," I said, staring down at him for an explanation to that.

Michah shrugged. "Maybe it's because the guys you know are hulking redneck morons."

"Hey! I'm a hulking redneck moron," I said. His eyes twinkled again and I laughed. Yes, that made sense too. Michah was sweet and timid and caring. He was nothing like any guy I had ever met.

"But you don't act gay either," I said.

His eyebrows rose in disbelief.

"What I mean is, you don't flap your wrists like the gay guys I see on television. And you don't wear girls clothes. You just seem more, I dunno, naturally feminine. Not like the guys screaming at each other about fashion and shit, you know? You don't walk around with glitter on your face and act like you own the world," I tried my best to explain what I meant.

He looked down at himself and then back to me.

"I guess, maybe. But then again, I was a loser in California too," he said.

I pressed my lips against his forehead and he sighed.

"You're not a loser," I whispered in his ear.

He stood on his toes and kissed me lightly on my mouth. "Thanks," he said.

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My mother yawned and stretched on the couch.

"I think watching so much television had made me exhausted. I'm going to go to bed," she announced.

Darkness had fallen early. The dark and rolling snow clouds didn't allow the weak evening sun to shine through.

She smiled sleepily and told the both of us goodnight and kissed the top of both of our heads.

"Goodnight Mom," I said and she shuffled down the hallway into her room in her slippers. She quietly shut the door and left Michah and I to ourselves.

"Your mom mentioned to me that your dad passed away. How long ago did it happen?" he asked me.

"I was ten. He was shot during a robbery that got out of hand. He was a police officer but he wasn't on duty. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time in his uniform. He was able to distract the robber for a few seconds so some kids could run out of the store. But my dad and the cashier were murdered and then the robber killed himself before back up could get there. My mom hasn't been the same since. She always worried about me and she still gets upset sometimes. I miss him a lot. She does too," I recounted to him. I had told the story so many times that my voice went on auto-pilot.

"You look just like her," he said quietly.

"Yeah, I get that a lot. I always wanted to look like my dad, but my hair and eyes are dark like Mom's. I also have her facial features although I do have his height and build," I explained.

Michah nodded. "She's so pretty and you are very handsome."

"Me? Handsome? Ha, nah," I laughed.

He gave me a withering look and rolled his eyes.

"Okay, maybe," I conceded. So he does think I'm good-looking. I grinned, feeling uncharacteristically pleased.

"Oh please. The girls at school fawn over you. They trip over their feet to talk to you," he said. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed."

"Well sure, girls talk to me and stuff. I've had girlfriends before. But the only reason they talk to me is because of Lee. He's a ladies man, not me. The only reason they want to have anything to do with me is because if they hang out with me, by extension they get to hang out with Lee. He helps me out," I protested.

He shook his head. "No."

"Um... yes. I know what you are going to say already." I mimicked his voice, "They want to hang out with you, not with Lee. You're so handsome. Sure, I'm alright. I get that. But I don't have the confidence Lee has. Hell, even Heather likes him," I said. Heather was one of the sexiest chicks in our school. She was the envy of girls everywhere, even amongst her own circle of friends. She often spoke of her modeling gig outside of school and every guy could see why.

Michah rolled his eyes again. "Sure, she likes Lee. I can tell. But you do realize that she was more into you before she started flirting with Lee?"

I laughed. "Okay, sure."

His eyes got wide and he stared at me like I was a bug from another planet. I wanted to shrink into the couch cushions.

"Julian! I can't believe you didn't realize that. Every time she tried to flirt with you, you didn't respond. Don't you remember when she started flirting with Lee? Do you know why? Because she wanted to make you jealous! And you didn't bite. So now she does like Lee, because he payed attention to her," he explained. I kept going over that day when Heather walked up to me and Lee in the hall during lunch the day before school let out for the bad weather. I remember her touching his arm and asking him if he wanted to come over to her house the next day. I remembered Lee telling me to follow him to Heather's house and I had refused because I wanted to take Michah home with me.

"So is that why he got upset with me? Because he thought I was blowing him off because I was mad Heather was flirting with him?" I asked, the light bulb in my head suddenly switching on.

He nodded.

"How the fuck do you know these things? How the hell was I supposed to figure that out?" I asked.

"Because, you have to admit, you aren't all that aware of yourself and the things happening around you. Lee wasn't just being mean to me for the sake of being mean. He thought you didn't want to be friends with him over the Heather thing. He saw you hanging out with me every day and thought you had found a new best gay bud, someone who wouldn't screw you over for a girl. It upset him and he lashed out," he elaborated.

"Hell, you could have told me that yesterday. Is it because you're gay that you know things like that?" I asked.

Michah grinned. "Maybe. I watch people and the things that happen around me. Unlike you," he added and tossed a couch pillow at me.

I caught it and turned it over in my hands, thinking. Should I call Lee and tell him I wasn't upset with him over Heather? Why am I not upset? A few weeks ago, I would have been trying to date Heather if I had known how she felt. But now I don't feel anything except that I don't want Lee to be upset over something I don't remotely care about.

"Call him," he whispered.

I grabbed my phone off the coffee table and headed into the dining room, away from the sounds of the television. I knew Michah was right.
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After several minutes of re-dialing Lee's phone number, he answered. I explained that I wasn't jealous about Heather. I also told him that, while I was still a bit angry he had treated Michah the way he did, I was sorry I freaked out on him. Lee didn't necessarily apologize about picking on Michah, but he did apologize for things getting out of hand. I was ready to accept his apology, as flaky as it was, because I wanted this to be over.

Apparently he did too.

He drove into my driveway less than an hour later while Michah was cuddled on my lap watching a sitcom. My mom didn't leave her room when the sound of Lee's car door slammed in the driveway, but it did cause Michah and I to leap up frantically. Michah shot for the kitchen and I ran for the bathroom in the opposite direction.

Lee barged into the house like a herd of buffalo and shouted, "Jules, yo!" I pretended to come back from the bathroom and shushed him like he was a child. My heart was pounding in my chest.

"Goddamnit, Lee. Mom's sleeping," I said in a hushed voice.

"Oh, dude sorry," he whispered.

"And how the fuck did you get here with the roads iced over?" I asked. Lee dropped his keys and wallet unceremoniously onto the coffee table and plopped down on my couch. His dreadlocks still had snow in them. I stood awkwardly with my arms crossed over my chest.

"No big deal, buddy. I drove through the woods and Old Man Gordan's farm," he said smugly and kicked his feet up on my coffee table.

"You're a crazy son-of-a-bitch," I said in awe and grinned. He grinned back.

"You know it, Jules. I think I hit a few cow patties though," he frowned. I laughed.

"Serves you right. Old Man Gordan would shoot you in the face if he knew it was you leaving those tire tracks through his pasture," I said and he threw his head back and laughed.

"Old Man Gordan can suck my dick, that stupid racist fuck. Did you know he called me a 'coon' at the gas station the other day? I thought about taking a huge dump on his porch and drowning a few of his sheep in that pond, but the I remembered my momma didn't raise me that way," he said. "So I decided to just fuck up a few hay bales on my way through."

I kept laughing. "That's some serious Silence of the Lambs shit," I said shaking my head.

"Yeah, let me hear that mutha' fucker call me a 'coon' one more time," he said. "I'm gonna kidnap a girl named Clarice and make that bitch watch as I cut open Old Man Gordan's skull and eat his brain." He then made slurping noises and I bent over double in stitches.

"Man, that's fucked up..." I choked. He shook snow from his dreadlocks onto the couch.

"Yeah. Sure is," he replied with a lop-sided grin, flashing his pearly whites. "So looks like I won't be going anywhere for a while. Your mom is sleeping right?" he asked.

I felt my heart sink. "Yes. She passed out a little while ago."

"Is there any Bud Light? I could use a fucking drink man. Driving through the woods gave me the heebie-jeebies. Snow and shit everywhere. Couldn't see a damn thing, I thought I was gonna get lost on that stupid bike path and almost ran into a tree," he said and stood up.

"Uh... No Bud Light. Mom didn't buy any at the store. All we have is Pabst Blue Ribbon," I said.

He wrinkled his nose and shrugged. "Blue Ribbon tastes like piss. I can't believe your mom drinks that stuff. But what the hell, right?"

"Right... Hey, let me go grab a few. Be right back," I said and skirted through the dining room before Lee had a chance to make up his mind about going to the kitchen. I heard him flipping through the channels on the television.

Michah was in the pantry and staring at the shelves and ruffling through them.

"Hey, is he gone?" he whispered and I walked in and shut the door behind me. I shook my head.

"Listen. He's probably going to stay here tonight. He said the snow is wicked and it's too dangerous to be on the roads," I explained. Michah's face fell. I knew how he felt. Lee was my best friend but I was annoyed with him.

"I know, he should have told me he was on his way," I whispered back.

"How did he get here, then? If he got here he can go back, right?" he asked frantically and grabbed my hand in his. I looked over my shoulder at the pantry door. It was still shut and I couldn't hear any movement in the kitchen.

"He drove the bike path and then trespassed onto private property. He said he almost wrecked and doesn't fancy having a go at it again," I said in a hushed tone.

Michah pressed his face into my chest and I bent down to kiss the top of his head.

"We're going to play it cool, okay? Whatever that means. He won't be too pleased to see that you're here but he's not a bad guy. Honest. I think we're all going to be here for a while so that will give him time to get used to you," I said and kissed his cheek.

"Jules? My man? You starving, because I could eat a baby deer right now. Do you have anything to... Jules?" I heard Lee's muffled voice through the closed pantry door.

Michah raced to the far end of the pantry and I swung open the pantry door. I almost hit Lee in the face with the edge of the wood but he jumped out of the way just in time.

"Whoa! You scared the shit out of me, you crazy fuck!" he said, laughing and grabbing at his chest. He took a deep breath and calmed down. "I was just thinking about getting a snack or something."

"Yeah, yeah I heard you. That's what I was doing too. I thought we might have something to munch on so Michah... Michah's been in here trying to find something. I think we have mac and cheese and some popcorn. Or we could heat up that pot roast Mom made yesterday," I rambled, trying to act normal about being found in the pantry with Michah when I was supposed to be grabbing beer from the refrigerator.

Lee stood stock still and registered Michah's presence. Michah looked up at Lee and then looked back quickly to the food on the shelves and began sorting through things again. He played his part very well, pretending to be immersed in the boxed cereals.

Lee straightened his spine and his jaw jutted forward, like he was sniffing out the situation as an animal would do in the wild when confronted by an unknown threat.

"What's up?" he asked Michah. Michah glanced at him out of the corner of his eye and nodded to acknowledge Lee.

Lee looked shrewdly at me and then back at Michah. Then, sensing that there was no threat, he relaxed and leaned against the door.

"Pot roast sounds good," he said.

"I can make some rice to go with it," Michah piped up and I nodded.

"Excellent," Lee said.
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Once the pot roast and rice were ready, Lee, Michah and I ate dinner in the living room. Lee insisted on watching a Die Hard movie. Michah sat on the opposite end of the couch from me and Lee propped up his feet in my dad's old arm-chair.

"This is really good. Your mom made this?" Michah whispered to me, amazed. I nodded, my mouth full of food.

I was slightly upset with Lee but I couldn't kick him out. I grimaced. I should have stopped letting my friends come over whenever they wanted. I knew I was being selfish but it seemed Lee always crashed at my place. I lived closer to the school so my house was a convenience. Not that I usually minded. But tonight I did.

There is a blizzard outside and he still managed to come over and eat my food. The thought almost made me laugh aloud, so I stuffed more rice in my mouth to keep from snorting and looking like a moron in front of Michah.

Oh great, now I'm worried about what Michah thinks.

I looked over at him and studied the way he curled up like a cat while he scooped rice off his plate. I noticed that he liked to eat the rice grain by grain off his fork. He seemed nervous and jumpy.

Probably because Lee is here.

As soon as I set my empty plate on the coffee table, the lights and television died. The fireplace was dark too except for a smattering of burning embers.

Lee hissed and I felt Michah jump on the couch next to me in the dark.

"Goddamnit," Lee muttered. "The good part was coming up," he said and I could hear his plate chink next to mine on the table.

"Firewood," I said and felt my way through the dark to the front door..

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I flipped the switch in the barn and waited for the lightbulb to flicker on.

Oh. Right. I'm an idiot.

I stumbled over a heavy object in the doorway and remembered the concrete block used to prop open the door when I worked on my motorcycle. Somewhere in the piles of junk, my motorcycle lay untouched since the past fall.

I worked my way carefully to the inside corner of the building where the firewood was piled. I felt for a nice big piece with my hands and a loud crash startled me. I had knocked over a portion of the wood pile.

"Shit!" I hissed and rubbed my temples. My hands were shaking and it wasn't from the freezing night air.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

I turned around and sat heavily on the wood pile and covered my face. A hurricane of thoughts slammed into my brain.

Am I gay? No, no I can't be gay! Michah said I'm bisexual, not gay. What if Lee figures it out? How can I keep my hands off Michah tonight? Why do I want to touch him like that? Am I some sort of freak? What will my friends say? Coach will kick me off the team! Go away Michah! I wish I had never met you. NO!

The last thought rocked me to my feet. My cheeks were uncharacteristically warm and I felt something wet on my cheeks.

Angry tears. Fear.

Stop being such a pussy

I didn't want to leave Michah alone with Lee for too long. I trudged through the calf-high snow and could see a faint flickering light dancing through the downstairs windows. With an arm load of wood and shivering violently, I kicked the bottom of the door so one of them would open it for me.

Lee swung open the door and helped me carry the firewood to the hearth.

"Do you have any more candles?" Michah asked me as I threw a few logs into the fireplace. I nodded. Lee got down on his knees to try and get the fire re-lit.

"I lit the ones I found in the kitchen but there were only three so I put them all in here," he said and wrapped his arms in front of his chest. "I figured we should put some in the bathrooms and in the hallway upstairs."

"I don't know how many more we have. I think I have a couple in my room somewhere," I mumbled and beckoned him to follow me up the stairs. We left Lee, cussing under his breath trying to light a starter log.

Silently he and I ascended to the second story of the house in pitch black. I felt Michah clutch the back of my shirt and I simultaneously wanted to shove him away, yet pull him to the floor and ravage him until he screamed my name.

Once in my bedroom, I shuffled through the dark and left him standing alone in front of my closet door. I felt around, looking for the candles I remembered tossing in my dresser drawer some months earlier.

"Julien," he said.

I didn't answer. I was too busy trying to find where I put the candles and I was afraid to speak.

"Julien," he said again, softly. I had no plausible reason to continue ignoring him. He obviously wanted to say something to me and I wasn't sure how I would handle whatever words left his mouth.

"Yeah?" I asked and threw my undershirts to the floor in frustration trying to find the candles.

"I'm scared," he whimpered. I felt something rise in my chest against my will.

"Of Lee?" I asked, keeping my voice as low as Michah's.

"Kind of. And you too. I really like you and I don't want you to stop being my friend," he said.

I sighed. It was so difficult to ignore him. Not when he said things like that, things that made me want to gather him up in my arms and tell him that I wold protect him from the world. I heard the shaking breaths he took and I realized how difficult it must have been for him to be that honest.

I crossed over to where he stood with unsure steps and leaned my cheek carefully against the top of his head.

"I'm scared too. Terrified, actually," I admitted.

"I know," he said. "That's the part that scares me."

I willed myself to continue, to explain myself so that he would understand.

"This...thing. I don't know why it's happening to me. It can't be normal. I cant get you out of my mind ever since you showed up here. I like hanging out with you because you're quiet like me and sweet and... lots of things. Should I be attracted to you? I don't know. I don't know anything," I whispered, giving up. There were no words to describe the turmoil within my brain and body.

I heard Lee curse again downstairs. Michah and I were safe for the moment away from him and anyone else.

"I can't answer that for you, you know that. I was just surprised how nice you've been to me when everyone else has been so cruel. I liked when you kissed me," he said.

I nodded and felt his soft hair rub against my cheek.

I felt the need to go on, to hurry, to take the chance to tell him what I'd been dying to say aloud for days.

"I still don't know if I'm just curious or if I am really attracted to you. I keep thinking all these... sexual... things," I stopped. I was too embarrassed to go on. The words sounded pitiful compared to the actual force within me that yearned to see his face flush with the pleasure of having me inside him.

Quick like lightning, Michah was on his knees and pulling my pants down to my ankles. I felt his lips kissing my belly and I nearly lost my balance in surprise. He pulled down my underwear and his hot wet lips surrounded my cock. timidly teasing me with flicks of his tongue. My knees almost gave way with the shock of what was taking place.

Oh. My. God.

I couldn't help it. I grabbed the back of his head and pushed myself deep into his mouth and groaned when I felt his throat constrict, gagging silently. My eyes were beginning to roll backwards as his head bobbed up and down on my throbbing member, bringing me closer and closer to ecstasy. His hands were wrapped tightly around the base of my cock, rubbing rapidly up and down as he sucked me off. The fire pulsed through my veins, culminating in an earth shaking orgasm. The intensity of the shudders wracked through my body. It was unlike any release I'd ever felt before.

With Michah still at my feet, I leaned over and lay my forehead against the closet door while he finished licking the remaining substance from my skin. I tensed up each time I felt his tongue slide across the tip of my member as I was still sensitive after my first sexual encounter with Michah.

He rose up and I melted against him. He held me tightly in his arms and buried his face in my chest. The silence this time was peaceful instead of uncomfortable.

Lee coughed dangerously close to our proximity.

"Yo, Jules, you got those candles?" he asked and I heard the top steps squeak under his bulky weight.

Michah and I scurried away from each other. I was frantically trying to pull my pants up properly in the dark and I almost tripped over my bed.

"Yeah!" I shouted. I thrust my hands quickly into my dresser drawer and found the candles I had been looking for on the first delve.

Lee was suddenly in my room and I heard Michah hurry off downstairs.

"Damn, what took you so long?" he demanded. I tried to coax my legs into working properly.

"It's dark, mother fucker, that's what," I muttered and Lee chuckled good naturedly. "I just need a lighter, can't find one," I made up. I shuffled some stuff on the dresser to make my lie seem more convincing.

"Hell man, you know I always have one. How do you think I got the fire started downstairs?" he said and I found his lighter in my hand. "You losing it, Jules?"

I laughed. To me it sounded unnatural. "Yes sir, I'm going completely insane."

The three of us sprawled out on my living room floor in front of the crackling fireplace. I inched my hand closer to Michah's softly resting face. His eyes flew open as my fingers caressed his cheek. He pressed his lips to my knuckles and gave me a sleepy satisfied smile. Lee snores rumbled through the house and I took my hand back. We both soon followed Lee into rest, with me aching to have him curled up against my chest.

The snow finished falling during the night.

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The snow finished falling during the night. I left Michah and Lee sleeping in the living room and stepped outside in my boots and heavy coat. The air was still below freezing but the wind had stopped whipping furiously. The yard and pasture beside my house was blanketed in waist-high white powder. I couldn't see the road at the end of my driveway but I could hear snowplows in the distance. It wouldn't be long before they removed the snow from the street and liberally salted the asphalt.

I watched my breath fog up in front of my face. I heard a cough from inside. I hoped it was Michah so I could properly tell him good morning before anyone else woke up.

I peeked in the living room and saw no movement. Michah lay curled up in a pile of blankets and Lee was sprawled out on his stomach, still snoring. I then looked past the dining room and saw the hem of my mother's nightgown slip into the kitchen.

I followed.

"Hi, sweetie," she said and yawned as she made herself a glass of water.

"The power went out last night," I said and took a seat in a stool at the table. She nodded and joined me.

"I figured that out when I saw you boys sleeping next to the fireplace," she said. "Be careful with those candles next time. I have to buy more now because you left them burning all night."

I nodded.

"Does Lee's mom know he's here?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at me.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I guess so."

"Is your cell phone getting service?" she asked.

"It was last night. I talked to Lee before he came over. And by the way, if Old Man Gordan asks you about any... misplaced hay bales, Lee was never over here," I said.

Mom rolled her eyes and sighed. "That boy is going to get himself into a world of trouble with Mr. Gordan."

I grinned.

"Morning," I heard Michah say. He walked timidly into the kitchen, barefoot, hair messy and wearing another pair of my old boxers and looking generally delectable. He pulled up a stool next to me and brushed his legs against mine as he sat down.

Mom smiled at him.

As if on cue, Lee stumbled into the kitchen wiping sleep from his eyes and holding the phone to his ear.

"I told you I was staying with Jules last night," he growled and mouthed the word "mom" to me while rolling his eyes.

"Come on! Really?! I'm snowed in over here. I can't come home right now!" he shouted and slumped over in the stool on my other side. Mom grimaced and started rummaging through the cabinets. She disliked when Lee argued with his mother.

Michah leaned over and whispered in my ear, "If it wasn't for Lee's mom calling, I would have slept in later." I felt a shiver creep down my arms as his warm breath fell against my neck. He grinned at me sleepily and I felt the increasingly familiar urge to possess and devour him. I managed to keep my hands to myself in present company by sheer will power, smiling and forcefully averting my attention away from the strange power he held over me.

Lee promised his mother he would leave as soon as the roads were drivable and hung up on her in mid-sentence. I told him that the roads were being cleared of snow and were in the process of being salted over and he groaned.

"She doesn't have to know that," he murmured, but my mom made it quite clear to him that, although she warned him to drive safely, she didn't want to be caught in the middle of a mother and son feud.

"I will not lie for you," she said sternly. Lee nodded, subdued and unhappy.

We all ate breakfast bars and answered Mom's questions about school. Football season was over but Lee regaled us all with hilarious stories of the past season games which eventually tapered off into discussing various player stats of our state's national football team. Lee and I argued about the upcoming Super Bowl and the nit-picky reasons why our team had not made it that year. I could tell it was boring the hell out of my mom and Michah.

Michah left us to take a shower and brought a candle to light the bathroom instead of bathing in the dark. I felt an intense curiosity that made me long to follow him, but instead I stayed with Lee. Eventually, Mom left us to ourselves and we both pulled on our heavy coats, laced up our boots and walked down my driveway to inspect the road.

We both chatted with the guys who were salting the road and learned, much to Lee's chagrin, that the roads leading to Lee's house were already taken care of earlier that morning as soon as the blizzard stopped raging because the fire and police departments were located down town, too.

"Goddamnit," he spat and I laughed. "Guess school's not going to be out as long as I thought."

"Great, thanks for ruining my day," I replied sarcastically and trudged through the snow back into my house.

Michah eventually returned from the shower and joined us in the kitchen again. Two hours passed and I noticed that every time Michah tried to join the conversation, Lee would cut him off or completely ignore his remarks. I tried my best to include Michah when chatting with Lee, but eventually he gave up and made up the excuse that he wanted to take another nap. I was at a loss about what to do. I wanted to throttle Lee for being so dismissive, but I couldn't think of anything to do except let it go.

Eventually after the conversation tapered off, Lee grabbed his keys and groaned about going home.

"Wish me luck," he said and loped over to his car.

"With driving or with your mom?" I asked, laughing.

"Both!" he shouted and eased his car into gear, backing out of my driveway. I watched his tail lights slowly disappear around the curve.

I closed the door behind me and looked for my mom. I peeked around the corner and saw her reading a book by the fireplace. She asked me if Lee had left and I nodded.

I walked up the stairs quietly. I took a quick shower in the dark and wrapped a towel around my waist. Although I dried my limbs and hair as best I could, I was freezing and shivering. I creeped into my room and was greeted with a pleasant image of Michah curled up under my covers with his eyes closed, breathing evenly and deeply.

I slipped on some long pajama pants and threw my towel onto my computer chair. I locked my door to make sure my mother wouldn't walk in uninvited and slipped under the covers next to him. He startled and peeked at me from underneath his long, dark eyelashes.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," I replied and smiled when he pecked my cheek.

"You're an ice-cube," he said like he was stating a fact. I nodded and sighed with relief when he pulled me against him, parting his thighs to let me settle between them.

Oh god, he feels so warm.

I closed my eyes and let him rub his hands up and down my back. I groaned, satisfied and pressed my face into the hollow of his neck, breathing in his clean scent.

"Warm enough yet?" he asked. I nodded groggily.

I drifted on the fog of a nap, lulled by the steady rise and fall of Michah's chest underneath mine and the light butterfly kisses he planted occasionally on my shoulder and cheek. I was comfortably warm and content in his arms.

"I'm not too heavy, am I?" I mumbled in his ear. I turned my head to see the profile of his face next to mine. He shook his head, wiggled underneath me and giggled.

"No, I like it," he said and kissed me on my shoulder again.

I slipped my hand under his bottom and squeezed. He giggled again and smacked my butt under the covers playfully.

"I know it doesn't work in this position, but damn it you are sexy," I whispered. I swallowed hard because I was getting turned on again.

Michah was silent and contemplative. I was suddenly aware that I may have been a little too open about what I wanted.

But he began rubbing his hands up and down my back again, choosing his words carefully.

"Well actually... It could work like this if I lifted my legs up. You're bigger than me so we could make it work," he whispered, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

"Really? Wow. I thought..." I said.

He nodded. "It's more common for guys to do it from behind but it's possible to have sex like this," he explained, still averting his eyes sheepishly from mine.

"Do you want to try?" he asked. I was stunned.

Should we do this? Is this wrong? What if everyone finds out!? Am I going to hurt him? I don't want to hurt him! But he is offering. I don't know what I'm doing. Oh god, what am I doing?!

"Is it going to hurt you?" I asked. I was hoping he would laugh at me and tell me to stop being dumb. But he scrunched up his face and took a deep breath.

"Probably," he said carefully, quietly. I felt a chill roll down my spine. "You see, you're a big guy in general and... and you're not little down there either."

"Then why would you be okay with that?" I asked and swallowed again. I could feel my muscles contracting slightly with anxiety.

He lifted up and I rolled over. He kissed my naked chest, climbed on top of me and settled his bum on my hips. I stared up at him, looking for any sign of what was about to take place.

"I'm a little nervous. But it won't hurt so much when I get used to you," he said. The sunlight streamed through my window and lit upon his face. His brown eyes were golden and the cute freckles across his nose reminded me highly of a pixie. I admired the shape of his body and the image of his legs on either side of my prostrate form. He's perfect.

"But I can't let you do anything like that to me unless you have some form of lubrication," he said.

I shot my arm across the bed and dived into my bedside table drawer and pulled out a small tube of lube. I held it up triumphantly for him to see and Michah had an attack of giggles.

"That was quick," he said and covered his face with his hands, trying to stifle the laughter issuing forth. I shrugged and he bent down to kiss me.

I wanted him so badly. The blood was rushing out of my brain towards the lower half of my body. I stifled a groan when his tongue found mine. I was afraid to move because I had no idea how to proceed.

I don't want to hurt him.

Michah kissed my lips tenderly, nibbling on them until I thought I'd die from anticipation. I remembered the feeling of his mouth on my cock, the mouth I tasted now. The animal in my chest began to roar and break loose. In a fury, I shed my pajama pants and violently departed Michah from the ill-fitting boxers I had loaned him.

"Oh!" he said, startled and nervous. I sat up, with him straddling my lap and leaned against the headboard of the bed naked and willing. He recovered quickly and I gasped as he massaged the lubricant onto my exposed erection. I could feel my hips thrusting upward against my will, as if I had lost control of my own body. I could barely stand the seconds passing by. I wanted to be inside him, to release my pent up frustrations of attraction, to hear him moan and feel his bottom grinding against me.

I took in a sharp hissing breath when he carefully and timidly positioned against that tight, warm entrance. He clutched at the back of my neck, bracing himself.

"Please be gentle," he begged, fear clouding his face.

Gentle! How can this be gentle?! What am I doing?

I gulped and nodded. His eyes burned into mine and I kissed his forehead, to let him know I would be as gentle as possible.

"You are running this show," I whispered. He took a deep breath to steady himself and clenched his eyes shut.

He slowly and deliberately lowered himself down. I could feel his body tremble against mine and I couldn't help but arch my head back in pleasure. He bit his lip to keep from crying out as I entered slowly and, for him, painfully. I immediately fought the urge to lift my hips, to be entirely encompassed within him. He rocked slightly against me, breathing sharp and grasping fitfully at my shoulders each time he took more of me inside. He whimpered a few times and his body began shaking tremendously. The guilt and desire were driving me over the edge.

His eyes were clamped shut and I could see a glisten of wetness on his eyelashes. I could feel the lightning substance crashing through my veins and knew the rush would come forth very soon.

"I can't... not all of it," he gasped. I groaned, not knowing how to plead with him to continue. My voice box had cut off communications. I kept my hands on his hips, and thought I did not use any force, I kept him where I wanted him. Where I needed him to be. Instinctively, although I knew I was hurting him, he stayed and continued to ride me as much as was possible.

The tidal force was coming, ripping down the barriers.

"Michah!" I hissed through clenched teeth.

"It's okay," he knowingly insisted and clung harder to me. Everything spilled forth like flood waters bursting through a levee. My mind was torn from me, leaving my body to pump all that was within me into him.

Both of our muscles relaxed and, though my cock was still partially inside him, he melted against me. He began kissing every inch of skin he could find while I caught my breath and fell over sideways onto the pillows.

"I'm sorry," he apologized when he nuzzled his way into my weakened arms.

I shook my head and pulled him close.

"No, I should be sorry," I replied with effort. "I know it was awful for you," I said. Now that I was recovering, I felt the weight of shame toppling onto my head. It was rapidly replacing the ecstasy.

Michah laughed breathlessly. "Silly man. Yes, it hurt. But in a good way because I knew it was you."

"I still feel awful for putting you through that," I mumbled.

"Shut up and take a nap," he giggled. He kissed me again.

I heeded his command and let the wave of drowsiness overtake me into oblivion.


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NOT FINISHED. PLEASE R&R TO LET ME KNOW IF I SHOULD CONTINUE WITH THIS STORY. THIS IS ONLY A ROUGH DRAFT. THANK YOU.