LUCK

i wasn't any exception to take over with any situation with brilliancy...being an optimistic it was hard to move on in every walk of life and come up with strong and capable decisions.though i was from a mediocre family but was a high thinker and never ever tried to underestimate myself.my family as well ancestors were very much educated but quite rebuke to surprisingly to me merely.wisdom was carried out in very mind from my family including siblings.but i can't cope up with that unfortunately,can't say that wasn't because of not having or getting enough crutch to move on but something was lacking behind...
that which i hadn't even searched to think about happened...
between all eyes i ought to be a shining star but that was based on lies, many of them probably and its well said that lies never carry contentments but only stress..image formed was a nice girl,as well an intelligent one and was no doubt about it but yet proved:
'''you rest you rust'''
i can't hold those lies and fake appreciations by others as they were not true as i said before all fake just false beliefs.
i wasn't laborious but a quite intelligent.the person suffering to all these was my angel mom.though i made many mistakes but she never disclosed it.though my grade points were not sufficient for her as she in her time was a brilliant one and expecting the same for her daughter.her ambition was to see me successful not alike her whose life just struggled.she wanted me to pluck all my desires which i dreamed about.
felt bad my watching her silent cry and perhaps thinking to be an ungrateful child
kept regretting on disgrace but never persuaded to improve ,don't know why ,may be chancing to be it as my luck ...
probably thinking and repenting on it.....
but now i do it frequent,,,,my sorrow is a wound which can never ever recover or if,,then,,may left a scar to make me feel lament..........!!!!
profound emotions but are still ''ineffable''.!!!