The Story of a Man

        Once, there was a man. He was no ordinary man, which would make him EXTRAordianry. He loved sunshine and kazoos, and he would always write stories that would make children shout in jubilation. And he was happy, because he was not ordinary, but EXTRAordianry indeed.

         One day though, he was sitting in his magical story writing desk, and he could not figure out what to write, and this bothered the EXTRAordinary man. How could he make the children happy without a story? He could not, that’s how. But! Because the EXTRAordianry man was not ordinary, he decided to go on an adventure of epic proportions, maybe then he could write a story that the children would love. So this was his plan. It wasn’t any ordinary plan, it was EXTRAordinary.

         So he packed his bag, only the essentials I might add, and set out on his grand adventure. He hoped to be back in time for dinner, because he made plans to go eat at the local diner. He was planning on ordering chicken fingers and a milkshake. But anyways he was off.

         He walked down the road in search of some Inspiration. Inspiration is a tricky thing to find. They tend to hide in the most peculiar places. The first destination he just so happen to come across was a nightclub, which was strange that there was people there because the time read: 11:42 AM. But the sign on the establishment read: THE DAYCLUB. So it made sense to him. The EXTRAordinary man hoped that he could find Inspiration there. He stepped inside and found many people on the dance floor, dancing the day away? Hmm… I thought that the expression would work with “day” as well, but that didn’t sound right. Anyways, there were lots of colors and lights and grand music that the DJ was playing. Everyone there seemed to be ordinary, except for the DJ, she seemed EXTRAordinary. And the man would know this, for he is EXTRAordinary, and he knows it when he sees it, trust me. So the EXTRAordinary man asked the EXTRAordinary DJ if she would like to join him on his quest to find the elusive Inspiration.  The man offered to share his lunch he packed, which included various sandwiches and snacks. So the DJ, needing Inspiration for her music and a snack I might add, decided to join the EXTRAordinary man on his journey.

         So they set off together in search of Inspiration, which was nowhere to be found. But they did not lose hope and forged ahead. The next destination was a magical forest that was conveniently located right next to the Dayclub. So they entered the magical forest and were soon lost within the maze of trees. The DJ was beat-boxing to keep their spirits up while the EXTRAordinary man searched for Inspiration. Yet his efforts seemed to be in vain because he could not, pardon my French, find that Damn Inspiration anywhere.

         But just then, a dragon appeared before them, a magical forest dragon to be exact. The EXTRAordinary man asked if he was a friendly dragon. She, being offend for being mistaken for a male, replied that she was a woman and that no, she was not a friendly dragon at all. The EXTRAiordinry man feeling foolish, apologized to the lady dragon and prepared himself for battle, for it seemed that the lady dragon was prepared to eat him and the DJ, and that would not swim well with him, not at all. And so we drew his magical plastic sword from its sheath and proceeded to engage in fierce combat with the offended monster, well, creature of scary heritage because I bet the term “monster” would offend her as well. And so with heated battle, literally, the dragon spits fire, and a test of spirits, the EXTRAordinary man came out on top, because he is without a doubt, EXTRAordinary. The dragon proceeded to fall to the ground, and there was much rejoice.

         So with the dragon slain, our friends moved on out of the magical forest. It turned out there was a directory, much like you would find at a mall, and it lead them out in the right direction. Their next destination was a beach, also located next to the magical forest and Dayclub. So they went down to the sea, “and in the sea there is a fish, a fish that has a secret wish, a wish to be a big cactus with a pink flower on it.” The EXTRAordinary man and the DJ became friends with this strange little fish. And the man could see that this fish was no ordinary fish, he was EXTRAordinary. So the DJ suggested to the man that the fish should join them. The man agreed. So the EXTRAordinary friends set off to find inspiration, and they had to do it fast, because it was getting closer to dinner time. So with time being of the essence, the made tracks.

         While they were walking, something stopped them dead in their tracks: Inspiration was standing there in the middle of the road. Now not only is Inspiration hard to find, it just so happens to be a wild animal that could really do some harm to someone, somewhere. So the trick is you have to control it, make it your master. And that is exactly what the EXTRAordinary man intended to do. Inspiration ran off, and so the friends followed. It became clear that chasing it down was not the greatest idea in the world. So the man had a plan, a plan that involved: rope, duck tape, radios, rubber ducks, unassuming attire, and a large amount of demolition grade dynamite that he just so happen to have packed in his bag, just in case. So, the plan was to lure the Inspiration in with the rubber ducky, because Inspirations have a thing for ducks of the rubber kind. The Inspiration would not notice the man, the DJ, and the fish with identity issues while wearing unassuming clothes. So with stealth they would lay sticks of dynamite around the trap. The radios were just cool to talk into. Once the dynamite was lit, it was all over. The dynamite exploded in a way that would make Michael Bay proud. This created a large crater around the Inspiration, leaving him trapped. So the EXTRAordinary friends used the rope and duct tape to capture the Inspiration. And there was much rejoice.

         The Inspiration agreed to help the EXTRAordinary man, DJ, and fish. The man was pleased with his adventure, and he invited the DJ and the fish to dinner with him at the local diner. They did. And the food was scrumptious. They became good friends as they talked of their wonderfully strange day. And when the EXTRAordinary man came home and sat in his magical story writing desk, he and his Inspiration wrote a wonderful tale that involved a DJ, a dragon, a strange fish, large explosions and friendship. And when he told his story to the little children of the town, they did cry out in jubilation like you would not believe. And the man was happy, because he was not ordinary with an ordinary life. He was indeed, without doubt or reproach, EXTRAordinrary. He liked it that way, and who wouldn’t. So, being the narrator, the lesson I took from this wasn’t friends always make things EXTRAordinary, or the best stories come from experience with a little help from Inspiration, but rather: things get done when you have dynamite on you. That just may be my interpretation, but that’s how I feel. And with that I bid thee adieu. Now get out of here.



THE END

(until the man can’t think of another story)