At The End Of Day

AT THE END OF THE DAY

Waking up in an old rundown motel, its hot an muggy with the summer heat, the walls are an eggshell color of shit, god how did I get to this point, get to the edge of the bed my feet are greeted with wire carpet that’s worn with filth of its prier tenant’s, silent with my head in my hands shaking my head in disbelief, I play my life on an old wall projector  in my head, I see my family my mom, dad, brother an sister. Its funny how the happiest memories make you cry the most, tiers in my eyes I walk to the bathroom turn on the shower thinking the waters dirtier then I am, cant shower away the sorrow in my heart, get out have a moment of clarity thinking about what im about to do. Lay out my suit with a dark color tie, it really doesent matter laughing to myself, grab my bag an keys an head out the door  walk to my car, the site of it alone makes shame rise till my heart starts to hurt always thinking I fucked up I got in this mess I wish I could blame someone or something, but I can only blame it on weakness. I get in an drive out of the parking lot an turn left right for downtown, now with an sence of calm an 4 shooters of jim beam I leave the circle k. I get to my destination pull in an park on the side, looking up at the sign, I take a deep breath exhale. Check my gun grab my bag an mask I stop think smirk an throw the mask on the front seat calmly shut my door an walk in. Nobody move!!! Put All the money in the bag now. Point my gun in the tellers face wanting to tell him sorry I don’t mean to hurt him that’s not what this is about. grab the bag, all I have to do is walk out those doors… almost their That’s funny bussy street an no cars. Outside the bank of  American it quiet….  Freeze Police Don’t move!!! I Close my eyes an rise my gun… IT WAS NEVER ABOUT THE MONEY!