A Trip Few Know About

I've been to hell and back,
but that's a trip few know about.
I know others have it worse.
So, there's no room for me to complain.
I've worn the iron smile for years.
It's just easier for everyone that way.
I've been on the edge.
I've cried till my eyes were dry.
I've laid awake wondering "What if?"
I'm not worth any tears.
Even when it is my time.
No one should cry.
Smile for what you know.
Forget what you don't know.
Sometimes I look to the skies,
to the clouds, to the stars.
I look and I wonder.
Is anyone thinking of me now?
I've given up on more dreams,
than I can begin to count.
I've written my life in a diary,
then destroyed it.
I was tired of reliving it all.
I ask but one thing of the world.
I ask for it to see me.
Just once.