Rumination

Rumination

Hungry and striving for an outlet
I swim through this mouthful torrent of various boundaries
Somewhere outside of this habitat
The source to the proper autonomy of the psyche resides
Precise and as resilient as the records foretell
Impatiently awaiting for the unbolting of these realms
And whatever secrets are locked inside
I urge to plunge into these unparalleled streams
Pride invites as well as my persona’s common sense
Obsessive about what lies beyond these walls
Must have a peek of the whole image
Must have a taste of its flavor and smell
My sense of self needs it, like a junkie
Pending for another fix, just hit me!

A light glows from the center of this fogginess
Ripping right through whatever is clouding my mind
Calming me to the point I curl back again
Now like a baby I struggle to be fed here in the inside.

I wait for hours and I wait for weeks
Frantic as I was before, I grow to be irritated
How much will it take for this to pursue?
I crave for the whole plaster, not drop by drop
I reject being noshed with a spoon, even if it’s silver
Even if it signifies a fitting requirement for the nurturing.

So I fight it… with all my strength…

But then… I fall again…

Humbled in my shamefulness
It has dug a hole for me to hide
Merciful as it is a boaster
I cannot ask for any more
It has given me the sight
To see where my mistakes lie
Inside my self-centering
Where I should let it stay
Eating me from right within
Poisoning my confidence
Drowning all my optimism.

Must embrace this radiant light
With open arms must accept it
There’s no other way to comply
This is the only mean for unveiling the oneness.