Imagine If

Imagine if…

- You were taken out of the country you were born in…

- You were taken to a foreign country

- Your skin was darker than your parents, your relatives, and your friends

- You keep getting questions about your past

and why you’re “different” than everyone else

- You went through the motions to “fit in” but something wasn’t quite right

- You grew up trying to like everyone else, but always ended up sticking out

- You denied who you really are, you finally fit in…. But what if…

One day: You think – Who am I, really?

Imagine if….

YOU went through life:

- Not knowing where you came from

- Not remembering where you born

- Not being able to go back to the city you were born in

- Not even being able to go back to the country you were born in

- Never learning your native language

- Never learning your religion

- Never learning your culture

- Never learning your heritage

As an adult, you can study all these things – and “catch up” on the times and knowledge you’ve “lost” – but instead of being born and growing up surrounded by YOUR culture and YOUR heritage, now you are embracing it from a different angle: as a foreigner – learning about a foreign country; YOUR foreign country.

Now – listen closely… All my life I’ve struggled with my adoption…… People tell me:

~ You have a family, relatives and friends, you don’t have to be blood to be family ~

I couldn’t agree with them more… It always reminds me what I DO have, instead of what I WISH I had. I am certainly blessed with the life I have, and I hold strong to it… But…

Imagine if….

- You didn’t have any basic/stable foundation in the beginning of your life: love, affection, a house, food, and clothes ~

Because I had none of that for the first 2 years of my life.

THEN you get to the stage where you think:

“I wish I was adopted”, “I wish I didnt have the parents I did”

Imagine if….

You were adopted and STILL…..

- Your childhood was full of abuse, crying, screaming, hitting, yelling etc. ~

Because I went through that.

The grass is NOT always greener on the other side…. So, think about ALL these things…. NOW INCLUDE – - Wandering through life wondering EVEN MORE…

All these things you can grow from and learn, you can learn work through, and slowly learn to let go – except for a very important part….

You are who you are – as you go through life- you grow and learn your likes, dislikes, you learn whether your parents are good or bad people – you have something to work with or against, you see your hero, and you see your enemy – we always say “I don’t ever want to end up like them”- “I will never turn into them, and if I do, stop me!” …. These are things, people know about their parents… Whether they are convicts, or God loving people – you KNOW these people… You know their actions, you’ve been with them through life – or even if you haven’t – you know SOMETHING about them – You can work through the issues of accepting them or rejecting them…..

But what if, you can’t? I hear people say: “I wish I didn’t have her nose” or “I wish I wasn’t so short”, or “I wish my hair wasn’t this colour” or “I wish….” – you are taught things to accept about yourself because it’s biological, you can’t change it, because it’s part of who you are, genetically – but what if you go through life, not knowing your genetic background?

Imagine if…

YOU went through life:

- Not knowing who your biological parents are

- Not knowing what their interests are

- Not knowing which parent you look like, if not both

- Not knowing how they talk/sound

- Not knowing how they act

- Not knowing if their personalities were serious or funny, or a bit of both?

- Not knowing where you pick up certain mannerisms from

- Not knowing anything about them…{/center}

No matter how grateful I may be: there is always a piece missing: not me as an individual – because I KNOW who I am – and what my strengths and weaknesses are – I know who I am – apart of me – my background – my questions – my culture – my country – my religion – all these things can be worked through – the orphanage, the abuse – that can be worked through as well – but my biological family…. That’s the missing piece – and no mater how many people you throw into your life… How many much love surrounds you… How many friends you have, how successful you become in life – the here and the now – is what we focus on – but in the back of your mind, everyday you realize – the very beginning and basic part of your life – is missing -

Imagine if….