AHOY,MA CHERIE.

Ahoy,ma chérie.


"She totally ignored you"Famia scoffed.
"She-did-NOT",I hissed annoyed."She just didn't hear me,that's all"I explained.
I and Famia were dawdling around after I got my arse busted in front of Chara;she's a Greek,don't mind her awkward name.
"She did not,anyways you got your ass handed back to yourself by a girl."I-will-not-go-into-the-details,heck,it's embarrassing.
"O.K.!so what should I do,eat myself."I was clearly annoyed and she was lingering on my so called "shame".
A voice interrupted our duel,"What are both of you up to?"Miss Marcia inquired.
"Nothing ma'am",both of us chirped harmonically.
"Then move back to you classes,hurry,hurry,go."
Famia made the first move gagging her mouth as she whispered "Did not!",with a sly grin and a playful gaze,blurting out the words stoutly;she was in deep trouble,I sensed it.
"What was that?".Miss marica demanded."My Lord,the level of impertinence in these youngsters keeps on growing.I'm telling you young lady if you keep on being imprudent and unstructured,you can get expelled from this institution,you get that!"She scolded Famia adding a rather abominable scowl on her face with her already existing "spry" features.Her idea was languid to 21st century if not for 20th;she as a school girl might have earned herself a few titles starting with "FUNDY/IE".
While I examined Miss Marcia,she continued her sermon feverishly"Young girls have no reason to talk to adolescent boys and provoke them and..."
"Inculcate lust in them for surely man is tempted."Famia completed the sentence with contempt.
"Girl you have a serious attitude problem and I hope Miss Edlyn would help us out in getting you sorted."
"NO!",a shrill shriek erupted from Famia's mouth."Sorry ma'am,I...I swear I'll never ever do it again",she said nervously as her face turned pale.
"You'll see dear."
Miss Marcia literally had to drag Famia by her tie and ended up at the same spot panting and heaving like a big dog while Famia tugged at the leash;heel girl,good girl.

~

"Suspended,for 3 days.Here you go lady",Miss Edlyn handed out the suspension card.
"What did I do?"Famia said with an cute innocent puppy face when she got out.
I mean what else can you expect to get after calling your teacher a crazy bitch.YES,she did say that.Miss Marica shot a look at me as if I was the culprit.I pictured myself draped in chains,pulled along shiny floors of pewter,pulled towards the towering desk of Astraia,the odess of justice."Aspasios";oh Lord,what sheer humiliation.
Forgive me,I forgot to introduce Miss Edlyn to you.Quite effectively pronouncing her persona,I will say that she is the terror of this school or convent-the way the teachers behave.She is 6`1,slender as stick,old as a hag,dissolved in her own business and when diluted nothing less stinging than nitric acid.For juniors she is a 16th century witch who was hanged,resurrected and crawling this land to make life nothing less than hell but for seniors she is like contra or pac-man in hard difficulty,old school,CHAOS!(As in the mythology).I would rob a bank,find Noah's ark or dig Chingez Khan's skull tower and guide the fountain of youth beneath it if she promises to leave this institution.She looks like a dummy with tabby streaks plastered over her head,her vestibule of a face is covered with scanty features and she sports a rather un-cliched principal expression.A busy New Yorker reviewer would write about her as a,

"Wax mannequin smoldered into shapeless cube,a very abstract piece of art,truly moving."
P.S. Also a tremendous exhibition.
P.P.S.WTF?*
*(Yeah that's what happens.)
Miss Edlyn always jolts the bejesus out of every-one.Not astonishingly,she left Famia high with trauma.But this was just Famia's case,I remember my time and it shudders the shit out of me!

~

"Chicken",Famia said to tease me a week after that incident.I knew I couldn't go up to Chara again,it was not worth the humiliation which accompanied it.
The first time I saw Chara,I felt as if a truck had crashed into my chest and broken my ribcage,dislodged my sternum and left my intercostal muscles taut.My aorta got entangled with my vena cavas and my heart recorded the highest bpm in class in the most irksome surroundings;YES!,it was biology class.
For a starter,there is nothing slutty about Chara except for her 30D bra who pokes out of her tube tops and sleeveless sweaters alike and her thongs which stick out of her "modest" pants and skirts or her huge cleavage(a miracle of wonder bra) or the time she stepped into the class in a bikini and not to mention the time she stepped in Miss Marcia's class stark naked!Exasperating or enjoyable,these things happened much later but I fell face flat for the beauty of Chara,instantly.
She was sitting beside me and apparently I had never seen her before.Perhaps she was another transexual,earlier a boy who fantasized about penises so much that one day his own body rejected to be male out of shame,so there went his baby gravy machine and was replaced by a huge cooter but it was just another silly thought which crossed my mind for a flash and gave me too much to worry about.
"FUCK IT."I thought to myself.
"Who was that?"the teacher erupted suddenly with sheer astonishment.Oops,I had said it aloud.
That's when Chara looked at me and I melted.I felt myself slipping through the hard wooden planks and dripping in thick blobs on the marble floor.SLAP!Brrrrr,get back to reality.I glanced at Chara and she smirked intelligently.I dozed into my subconscious again when suddenly my desk cracked under the mighty hammer of Thor.I lifted my gaze 3 feet higher and saw miss Una towering over me with a ruler poking between her thumb and first finger like a wand.
Well,miss Una fits under the stereotypical category of all teachers;nothing unexpected or original,rubric of normality.So apparently,there is nothing important to tell about her.
Bang,bang,bang!I got the medicine,it was better than going to the house on insanity from where no-one comes sane.
After the class ended,I gave Chara a headstart,took a lung filling breath and inhaled enough oxygen to get me high.Chara walked past me,ahead of the first row,ahead of the hunks(whew,relief) and then I trailed behind her.STOP!she halts infront of the pedestal fan to cool off the sweat.Oh,her breasts,oh,the Channel perforating THROUGH her sweater,ohhhhh....CRASH!!! I banged hard into the wall beside Chara.
"Oh,are you hurt?"she sounded concerned.
"Ahhhh,ohhhh...ooo.."I groaned.
"What was that?"
"Nah,I'm alright"I said,adjusting my nose.Shit! It had broken at the most in-appropriate time,stupid nose,stupid wall.
She put her hand on my shoulder when suddenly I felt my head raising,I felt the world was spinning,I was sinking down my sub-conscious.Déjà vu,I knew it,hell...!
I felt as if my body cells were being electrified,I shot up straight,did a Michael Jackson snaky back thing,my hormones had gone crazy.I could hear Kurt Cobain screaming RAPE ME! RAPE ME! I felt as if I had got a sucker-punch and had seen the curvature of Mother Earth.I saw retro neons flashing D-I-G-I-T-A-L L-O-V-E!
I was back on my feet in less than an instant and Chara stood there staring at me,eyes shot wide.
"Oh yeah baby,you're my stud".
SLAP!back to reality.


~