I want somebody to listen,
but I also want to fade.
I want to scream till my lungs bleed, Look! I'm here!
– My venting stored emotion, finally freed.
But I want to be the colour of all walls,
I want see-through skin.
Invisibly, I walk through rowdy halls,
unnoticeably, I don't get back up when I fall.
I want to lie down on dewy grass,
close my eyes to the feeling of shattered glass.
But I need the words to pass,
stuck inside and screaming,
burning like hot flames with feeling.
Unequivocal emotion never leaving,
never fading.
But deeper and deeper I go into icy water.
not resurfacing,
or wading.
It gets harder to scream when you're frozen,
and the words are words never spoken.
I'll burn and fizzle,
roam,
and wait. And burn. And yearn.
But I'll always be,
forever alone.
Trapped in a wanting body,
feeling my lungs burn
and my heart bleed.
Venting stored emotion, – never freed.
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