Counterblow (Working Title)

PLEASE NOTE: This is a 'raw draft' - all the ideas are coming straight out of my head with no revisions - please excuse some of the grammar errors and redundancy :)

December 1999

Robert placed his hands on the table, a bead of sweat ran down his temple, crawling down so slowly he could smell the salt in his own sweat.  The barrel of the gun nudged into the back of his neck, a tear quickly ran down his face as he could feel his face beginning to crumble.  Suddenly, a woman appeared around the corner, bright and bubbly, a large smile across her face.  She had been looking back at her daughter, until she looked forward, the scene displayed in front of her.  Quickly her hands went over her mouth and her knees hit the floor.  She began sobbing as Robert could feel his insides starting to break.
        “Mom!” she shouted and quickly threw her arms around her.  She looked up at Robert, her eyes silently crying.
        “I love you.” He mouthed to her.
        The man behind Robert nudged the barrel into Robert’s neck as he winced his eyes shut, the gun jammed, as he let out a quick sigh of relief he turned around rapidly and grabbed the man’s throat.  His hands tightened, as he looked deep into the other man’s eyes, a face so familiar he could have placed it anywhere.  The face of a man he had put away almost twenty years ago – a man who had somehow managed to find him again.

One year earlier

        Robert wrapped his arms around his lover warmly, her skin a beautiful bronze as the sun filtered in through the window, the beach waves echoing in the distance.  He smiled softly and smelled her hair, felt her body against his, the sweat beginning to fall down his back from her heat and the heat of the morning sun.  She rolled over and laughed, her laugh so warm and inviting as he ran his hand slowly through her short platinum hair.  He kissed her softly as she ran her free hand down his side, feeling the soft fine hairs shoot up from her touch.  His beautiful blue eyes glistened in the light as she kissed him passionately, her hands winding through loose scruffy, graying hair.  They kissed deeply, his hands cupping her head, her fingers trailing down his back, until the door suddenly opened.
        “Gross.” A young girl said as Robert looked up with one eye and saw his teenage daughter standing in the doorway.
        “Good morning Amanda.” He said, his mouth still partially kissing Kate’s.
        “Where is the waffle iron?”
        “In the cabinet, in the island.” Kate said, between kissing down his neck.
        She rolled her eyes and closed the door, but not before saying,
        “Gross.”
        Kate passionately kissed Robert again as he shook his head and said,
        “We should go make sure she doesn’t burn the house down.”
        Slowly her lips kissed down his chest as she wound her hands down his legs, his hands reaching out to grab her.
        “She can wait five minutes.” He said as he closed his eyes and pulled her on top of him.
        “Ten minutes.” She said, her green eyes staring down at him, a beautiful emerald green in the sunlight.
        His hands moved up her short nightgown as she bent down and kissed him softly, his hands fingering her panties.  She ran her fingers through his hair as his hands wound softly around the backs of her legs and up into her panties, until the sound of the smoke alarm blaring jolted them out of their trance.
        “Shit!” she said loudly as Robert chuckled.
        “Its not funny…” she said as she hopped up and grabbed a robe off the back of the bathroom door.  He slowly sat on the edge of the bed, and pulled on a pair of sweat pants that read ‘FBI’ down the side.
        “It’s ironic.” He muttered as she ran down the hall. 
        He yawned slowly and ambled down the hall, running a hand through his hair.  He turned the corner and saw Kate waving her hand around, Amanda standing against the counter.
        “Gross.” She said again as she looked at Robert.
        “What?” he asked.
        “Put a shirt on.”
        “I’m fifty Amanda not eighty, now go do something to entertain yourself, and we are gonna talk about using cooking devices later.”
        “Fine whatever.” She said and stomped off down the hall.
        “I’ve never seen a sixteen year old set a waffle iron on fire.” She said as she doused the waffle iron in the sink. 
        Robert pulled a stool out of the pantry closet and opened the smoke alarm, yanking the batteries out.  Kate sighed as she closed her eyes and leaned against the counter.  Robert hopped off the stool and placed the cover and batteries on the counter.  He leaned against the island and looked over at her, a small smile creeping on his face.
        “What?” she asked.
        “You.”
        “What?” she asked again.
        “You’re sexy when you’re stressed.”
        “You need to back away right now.”
        “Why…”
        He moved in closer as she held her hands up.  Quickly he pulled her towards him.
        “No, stop it.” She whined as he kissed down her neck.
        He continued to kiss her as she laughed loudly and then looked up into his eyes, soft and intently focused on her.  She slowly kissed him as he held her in his arms, never wanting to let her go.
        “I think you need to explain to your daughter the dangers of the waffle iron.” He said quietly.
        She looked up at him, an annoyed look across her face.
        “You get that honor.” She said, a small smile then spreading across her face.
        Robert groaned and headed back to the bedroom to grab a t shirt.  As he rounded the corner, Robert caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and paused for a moment.  He walked up to it slowly and looked at himself, observing some of the effects of gravity.  He was by no means in bad shape, still sporting a muscular physique for his job, but the effects of time had begun to take their toll.  He tugged at is stomach, some of the skin having loosened with age.  He pulled at his face, stretching his eye down, hoping by some miracle that would make the wrinkles disappear.  When they didn’t he sighed and pulled a shirt out of his drawer and walked out to the living room.
        “You looked at yourself in the mirror again didn’t you?” she asked as he rounded the kitchen bar and walked towards the back of the house.
        “Yeah and I can see why our daughter thinks its gross.” He called back.

        “If it’s any consolation I think you’re sexy!” she shouted.
        She heard him come around the corner, and as he poked his head around he said,
        “Kate my tattoos are starting to sag – my tattoos.”
        She gave a snort of laughter as he rolled his eyes and walked down the hall.  Before he reached Amanda’s room he saw a pile of mail sitting on a small hall table and picked it up.  He picked through the pieces, mostly bills and junk, until he saw a letter with scrawled handwriting on the front, the return address being a prison in California.  Curiously he opened the letter, grabbed reading glasses off the table, and found a piece of notebook paper with the following scrawled in red ink:

        Robert,

        They are going to put me to death – you ready to come and watch?

        Your Pal,
        Leonard

        Robert went white for a minute as the rest of the mail dropped out of his hands, the letter sitting loosely in his free hand.
        “Robert, waffles should be ready soon are you done talking to –“ she said as she rounded the corner, stopping suddenly when she saw his face.
        “Oh my God.” He said slowly.
        “Are you ok?” she asked.
        She looked up at his face and then down at the letter.  She went silent as she read it, her mouth dropping open a little bit.
        “I thought he was already executed?” she whispered.
        “That’s what I thought too.”
        They stood in silence as Amanda came out of her room, an annoyed look on her face.
        “Have you guys seen my-“ she was stopped short when she saw the pile of mail by her father’s feet.
        “Dad?” she asked.
        “I can’t believe they never told me he was still alive.” He said.
        “Are you surprised Robert?”
        He shook his head and took off the glasses, his hand shaking as she took the letter from him and picked up the rest of the mail.
        “He was a psychopath.  He was the reason we left California and came to Florida.”
        “I know Robert, come sit down.” She said as she guided him to the couch.
        Amanda watched as her father sat down on the couch, his hand running through his hair slowly, mind swimming with thoughts – terrified some of them might come true.
        “I specifically asked for them to tell me when they finally put him down.” Robert said, his voice growing louder.
        “I know,” Kate said as she laid the mail on the coffee table, “We just need to call that guy over at CMF – whatever his name was.”
        “Howard.” Robert said.
        “They might have sent him back there at the last minute, held off the execution.  They’ve done this before.”
        “They’ve done it before, but they at least told me it was happening and they restricted his mail – they watched it!” Robert said loudly, getting annoyed.
        “Ok, calm down I’m gonna get the phone ok?”
        She walked around to the back of the couch and saw Amanda leaning against the wall, a worried look stretched across her face.
        “Go on back to your room and I’ll explain.” She said.
        Amanda headed back to her room as Kate grabbed the phone and began dialing.  She paused for a few minutes as Robert buried his head in his hands, the memories flooding over him, the amount of pain and torture this man had caused was indescribable.
        “Yeah, can I speak to Howard Renn please?”         
        She paused as the operator placed her on hold.
        “I’m on hold.” She said.
        Robert continued to look down at the floor, remembering the color of the psychiatrists floor – they were ironically the same color.  He closed his eyes and remembered the first day he had walked in there, not wanting to be there in the first place.

January 1983

        Robert looked over at Kate, his leg twitching up and down quickly, hand glued to the arm rest.  Kate slowly reached over and grabbed his leg, a pained look on her face.
        “Sorry.” He said softly.
        “Just calm down.” She said as she then squeezed his leg, a small smile on her face.
        “Not here…” he said as he looked over at the receptionist, tucked behind the glass, watching them.
        “Fine…” she said and took her hand off his leg.
        “Later though…”
        “Robert Carter?” a man said as they both looked over quickly, unaware he had stepped out.
        “Yeah.”
        “I’m Dr. Casey.” He said as he extended his hand to Robert.  Robert slowly took it, his gesture uneasy.  They followed him in as he brought a chair around to the front of his desk and sat down, Robert and Kate slowly sitting down on the couch across from him.
        “I understand the bureau required you to come to these sessions?”
        “Yeah, they said what we had seen was so horrible it was mandatory.  I just don’t think about it…and move on with my life…but they want us to rehash it.”
        “They want you to work through it.”
        Robert was silent as he looked over to Kate, giving her a pleading look.
        “I think I’m going to be sick.” She said and ran out the door.
        Robert looked over to the doctor and gave him a small smile.
        “She’s three months pregnant.”
        He nodded as Robert looked away, his expression distant.
        “How long have you been married?”
        “We’re not married…we had a common law marriage.”
        He nodded as Robert looked away, disconnecting further.
        “How long have you known Kate?”
        “Ok, you know why don’t we just get to the point of all this.”
        The doctor shifted in his chair and let out a small sigh.
        “You want to talk about it?”
        “No, but if I have to I will.”
        He was silent for a minute as the doctor patiently waited for him to begin.
        “When we walked in…it was heavy.  We didn’t even know what we were going into – we live in California we’re used to a lot of sick shit…this was beyond disgusting.  I don’t really know how else to put it, I’m literally grasping for the correct word and I cannot find it.”
        He paused for a minute and sighed heavily, his hands clasping together tightly.
        “I used to be a cop, I saw a lot of really horrible things.  I saw rapists go free after ten or eighteen months in prison.  That’s why I took this job, federally change the laws one day and a lot of the arrests we made were revolutionary.  We aren’t an official unit, we probably never will be.  I’m telling you man, this guy was beyond disgusting and honestly I am only telling you this because I have to.  I haven’t even told Kate what I saw – and I don’t plan on telling anyone else.”
        He sighed and leaned back into the couch.
        “The air smelled disgusting and it’s a smell you cannot define…and I remember holding back the urge to throw up.  It’s still so fresh in my mind, we walked through the front door, into the foyer and when we ended up in the living room it was like looking at a massacre.  I had never seen so many children…slaughtered.  So many women…slaughtered.  You could smell the blood there was so much of it all over the floor, on the walls, in everything.  I remember one of our guys vomited, and I came pretty close – we all had dry heaves.  How do you prepare yourself for something like that?  You don’t – you just walk in and it hits you.”
        “We had tracked this guy for over five years, since the 1970’s – back then he was just a serial rapist.  A bit of a religious nutcase – had a fascination with The Peoples Temple that kind of stuff.  He evolved from a petty theft to serial rapist to cult murder.  We don’t know where to place him on the spectrum of crazy…he went nuts on all these women and children.  Just completely nuts.”
        “He had taken one woman and gutted her like a deer, like when you disembowel a deer.  One child was decapitated, quartered, and scattered everywhere.  It was like nothing I had ever seen, he had no method, no discernable way of killing any of them.  It was almost as if he had grown tired of calculations and just went mad.  It was interesting because he was so calculating, so logical, everything he left was neat and clean.”
        Robert began to grow agitated, his hands running through his sandy blonde hair quickly, his eyes an intense ice blue.
        “Goddamnit I don’t want to talk about this anymore!” he shouted and threw his hands up in the air.  The doctor quickly stood up, his hands up in the air, protecting himself from any erratic movements.
        “Why can’t I just forget this?  Everyone wants me to keep remembering it!  It was so goddamn horrible!  He killed women and children, gutted them like animals – or maybe it wasn’t him, who knows we may never find the answer!  All I know is that I will never forget this as long as I live and I don’t need to sit here and rehash it over and over again!  I have a child to think about, another life to protect – and not to mention the love of my life!  All I can think about is how to protect them both and keep anything like this from ever happening again!”
        Dr. Casey looked at him with soft eyes and watched as he sat back down on the couch, head in his hands, crying. 
        “Robert,” he said softly, “Things like this will happen again.  Your job is to try and prevent them from happening again…but you are one man.”
        He looked up at Dr. Casey, eyes red, tears staining his face.
        “I know, but I want to…I want to never have this happen again.”
        Dr. Casey sighed as he put an arm around Robert’s shoulders.
        “The only way that will happen is if he gets the death penalty…”
        “He’s just one man…just one man…what about all the other sick fucks out there huh?”         
        “You may not understand this now, but this is impacting you more than you think Robert.  This is why your team was mandated to come here…this is why we are having this discussion.  The FBI wants to make sure that you can carry out your duty as leader of this group – who are doing revolutionary work.”
        Robert sighed heavily and put a hand to his face, holding his temple, head throbbing from the crying.  His eyes squeezed shut as the door opened, Kate slowly walking in.
        “Robert are you ok?” she asked softly.
        He looked up at her, his face lost and child like, her arms quickly enveloping him as he sobbed again.  She held him close, her hand resting softly on the back of his head, her gaze frantic.
        “It was horrible…” he said, his voice shaking.
        She kissed his head quickly, her cheek against his soft hair, as a quick tear rolled down her face.  Her mouth parted slightly as she closed her eyes and held him close, his sobs muffled in her shoulder.
        “Its ok.”
        Dr. Casey sat down across from them, pulling the chair up to them both.  He put a hand on Robert’s shoulder softly.
        “This is why they mandated this.” He said softly.
        “He never told me he was upset.” She whispered.
        Her hand shook as she wiped the tear from her face.  Robert looked up at her, his face red, eyes and nose a runny mess.  She reached over to the table to the side of them and grabbed a tissue.  Slowly she wiped his face, then taking the tissue from her to blow his nose.
        “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, her face pleading.
        “Because Kate, there were children involved, so many children.  You’re pregnant.”
        “I’m happy that you want to protect me, but you at least have to say something Robert!  You have to let me know how you are feeling!”
        “I didn’t want to – I’m supposed to protect you!  I had to be strong about all of this – I had to dedicate myself to making sure this never happened again.”
        “Robert you can’t save the world!  I love you with all my heart, but there are some sick people out there – some really sick fucks – and you cannot catch them all!”
        He put a hand on her face and ran it through her hair, then a short dark black.  She closed her eyes and leaned into his palm.
        “I want to help everyone.” He said.
        “You can’t baby, you can’t.  All you can do is control what you can – this family and anything that has to do with your job.  You caught that man, he’s going to go on trial and he will probably die for what he did.  You did a good thing finding him – your team did a good thing finding him.”
        He nodded slowly, his eyes looking towards the floor.  Dr. Casey slowly took his hand off Robert’s back, Robert snapping to – remembering he was in the room.
        “I think you should go home and talk about this together.”
        Robert nodded and slowly stood up.
        “Are you going to suspend me?”
        “No…you showed more emotion than any of your colleagues.  This is what you needed to do – let it all out.  Only one other got close.”
        They walked out slowly, Dr. Casey shutting the door behind them.  Robert looked at Kate, and smiled softly.  She slowly put a few hair back into place, and did the same to him.  He grabbed her hand and kissed it softly as they walked into the hall.
        “I love you.” He whispered.
       
December 1998

        Robert woke up a couple of hours later, curled up in the unmade bed from the morning, Kate sitting next to him.
        “Robert?” she asked slowly.
        His eyes were fuzzy as he focused in on her.
        “Hey.” He replied softly.
        “You passed out.” She said softly.
        “Not in front of-“
        She nodded, “Yes in front of Amanda.”
        “Shit.” He said loudly.
        She ran a hand through his hair, his hand slowly reaching for hers.  He kissed it softly as she smiled.
        “You threw up a little too.” She said.
        “What?”
        “Yeah.”
        “Damnit!”
        She held his hand, as he sighed and put his other hand to his head, a sharp pain moving through it.
        “Let me get you some aspirin.” She said and walked to the bathroom.  Robert moaned and rolled over on his back, his hand gently resting on his stomach.  He played with the bottom of his shirt for a minute, his mind trying to catch up again.
        “Here.” She said and handed him two aspirin, along with a small glass of water.
        He slowly sat up against the headboard, and knocked back the aspirin.
        “I feel like everything is spinning.” He said.
        “Drink some more of the water, the vomiting probably made you dehydrated.”
        He leaned his head back slowly, making a small thump as he closed his eyes and sighed heavily.
        “What did Howard say?”
        “He apologized profusely – said a staff member was supposed to notify you and the letter was never sent out.  They don’t know how he got our address.”
        “Jesus.” He said as he held him head, eyes squeezing together tightly.
        “He’s calling the Bureau now and they are looking into it.”
        “The whole reason we moved was the protect Amanda.  I wanted to move when you were pregnant, but we waited and had her in California…I thought that we would be ok.”
        “I know.” She said.
        “That sick fuck is trying to get to me.  I don’t know why I let it get to me.”
        “Look Robert, when you told me the details of what happened – I’m surprised you kept it in for as long as you did.”
        “I didn’t even tell the shrink everything.  I didn’t tell him about the bodies in the wall, children torn from pregnant women – disgusting shit.”
        “Shh…” she said nodding towards the open door.
        “There was so much I wanted to forget.” He said softly.
        “Only you know how it happened.  Look go back to sleep.  I’ll stay with you – Amanda wanted to go to a friend’s house this afternoon.  I’ll tell her to go over there and you can rest.”
        Robert grabbed his stomach with one hand, a queasy feeling coming over him rapidly.  His thoughts emerged again as he ran to the bathroom and threw up again.  Kate quickly shut the bedroom door.
        “Mom is Dad ok?”
        “Your father is feeling sick.  I think he has a bug or something – why don’t you go over to your friend’s house ok?”
        Amanda looked at her mother, her blue eyes darkening as she crossed her arms.
        “Ok.” She said quietly.
        “Let me drive you over there-“
        “No, Mom its ok I will walk there.”
        She walked quickly towards the front door, slamming it loudly behind her.  Kate sighed as she ran a hand through her hair grabbing at the strands, wanting to rip it out.  Quickly she walked back into the bedroom and softly shut the door behind her.
        “You aren’t driving her?” Robert said groggily from the bathroom.
        “No Robert she will be fine.”
        A look of panic crossed his face as he quickly rose up from the bathroom floor.
        “She can’t be going out there alone, not after that letter!”
        “Shh!” Kate said as she eased him back down on the floor.
        He laid the toilet cover down and flushed it.  Slowly he got up and walked over to the bed, Kate’s arm around his shoulder.
        “It will be ok.  Rest Robert, please rest.”         
        Robert laid down, his body curled slightly in a ball as he closed his eyes, the sound of the ocean echoing in his mind as he fell asleep, Kate’s arms around him fingers intertwined with his.