Sleepy Faust

I was disgusted with myself. I was disgusted with myself and the others; ‘cause I need some hope that would save me from it because I can no more be the one that I had wanted to be. I am today’s Faust.

            Faust? Welcome Faust, we have been waiting for you for a while. What good has brought you to these parts? Have you come to help us?

            You cannot… first, who told you that you can help us?

            You can’t no, you better return to where you came from. There’s no place for you in this land, we are already with much more than we should be.

            What are you still doing here?

            You want to know why you cannot help us? There’s no reason… you probably think that we the others don’t want to be all Fausts like you, but we can’t, there is a route to be followed. We shouldn’t just like that pass over the work, directly moving on to the things that you want to do. You cannot, I tell you… don’t make me repeat all the time the same thing because we cannot give you more than what I’ve told you thus far.

            I don’t doubt that you are Faust, but I’m saying that you are not who you think you are.

            How, what are you? You should have understood it. You are welcoming Faust, that’s what… Try better you damn buffoon, you can’t save yourself from your true identity. You are a buffoon, and throughout history buffoons have always needed to be welcoming.

Really how welcoming they are, they are truly welcoming believe me.

            You are not a buffoon? But you already told me that you don’t know what you are, how can you be sure that you’re not a buffoon? It’s as if you are nothing and I say that you’re not, what else can you be? Define your form first and then tell me that you’re not nothing. For the moment you are nothing. Why do you argue with me Faust? Now you say you are Faust and you blush. It’s a heavy weight I know that often you don’t believe it. You’re stuttering, oh derëzi. You have lost your way and you want to accomplish what you want to, and then become Faust. At the moment you’re not.

            Yes I, I already told you you are, but in my opinion you are also a buffoon. Isn’t that what you actually are?

            You cannot be because you have told me earlier that you are Faust, but even if I tell you that you are something but even in the case I would know what that would be I wouldn’t tell you because I cannot put you in the wrong direction.

            No, no don’t look for it please, because I cannot do it.

            Go now…

            Wait up where are you going?

            I told you to leave but you have already come to be a Faust. By the way did you meet Mephistopholes recently. No? How do you aim to be a Faust, without meeting him first? He is the only one, besides the last Faust, at that point he understood that his way toward greatness had just begun. And you tell me that you have never met Mephisopholes. What came to your mind anyway? Are you crazy? Why do you stay in front of me like that like someone stupid?

            We have thousands Mephisopholes’ sons but if you never overcome the father you never overcome the thousands of sons. Those that you know, those that rule us and judge us today are so wild that you cannot even imagine; they have the advantage that you are as mundane as them here, whereas Mephistopholes had to plan your destruction, because he can never do such a thing immediately. While those, those to whom you say hey friend, eat you alive, and the spine that keeps you on your feet they eat.

            So go, become Faust and come save us one more time…