Remembering Mom

My mom use to be alive. I'll always remember what she looked like. She had dark hair and a ruddy complexion. She was stubborn and very opinionated.

She was from Indiana. She met my father in the 70's at a service and towing station. Believing in love at first site, she married my dad nine months after the met.

Together they travel the country. Her favorite trip is when did a fire watch at Yellowstone. As a young couple, they went places I could only dream of.

After two years of traveling and doing a lot of different things they stopped. They moved to Michigan and settled down. Like some couples, they weren't sure if they want children. But if one came they were ready.

In 1977, my mom got very sick. This freaked out my father. He took her to the hospital. He didn't know what to think. The doctors told him that my mom was a diabetic.

She got better and left the hospital after 19 days. She was on a lot medication including insulin. My mom wasn't use to being a diabetic. So it took her awhile to actually comprehend her disease.

About a year later,she had me. I was born c-section. It was either that or we both would have died. I was tiny and 5 weeks early. She got to go home before I did. I had to stay in the neo- natal unit for about 2 weeks.

Luckily for me, I was healthy. I didn't have any medical problems.But I did have watch my sugar intake.

Throughout my life, my mom's health did get better. Her insulin was under control and she didn't have to take as many medications. At the time, I thought she would live forever. But i was didn't know any better.

When I was a teenager,everything changed. Her health was getting worse. I did everything to help out my dad. But eventually there was nothing that could be done.

I remember the last day she was alive. I was a senior in high school. My mom got up from bed to babysit. The kid's mom dropped him off. I was getting ready for school. I left a little later.

Went to school and went to my classes. I had a feeling something wasn't right. I fought the feeling for most of the day. Finally after five periods of school, I skipped my last class and went home.

I don't remember anything on that walk home. It seem like that walk went too quickly because I was home in minutes.

My mom was up with Garth. She getting him ready to go home. His mom came and got him. She did the dishes and went to take a nap. I asked her if she ate. She grumble something and went to her room.

I went outside to do my homework. That's exactly what I was doing when my dad cam home. He asked me where mom was. I told him she was napping.

He went to check on her. Suddenly he called me and I went to the room. He told me to call 911. My mother wasn't breathing. I called 911 and the operator gave instructions for CPR. He administrate CPR until the ambulance driver took over.

They took her to the hospital. But we knew she was gone. I was sad but I had to be strong for my father. Even though he didn't show it he was miserable.

We arrived at the hospital and they told us what we already knew. I was okay until I said my final goodbye. Then i cried like a baby. My father took it stride but I knew deep down he was really upset.

I took the rest of the week off from school. He took time of from work. He alerted our family and friends. We had a memorial service. A lot of people show their respect. She would be missed by everyone.

We had a small wake for her. We grieved and cried. People bought food over. We remembered all the good times and remembered her for who she was.

The initial shock of her death wasn't easy. We got through it day by day. He went back to work. And I went back to school.

I graduated from high school. Got through summer vacation and started college in the fall. Dad started dating again. We got on with our lives. As hard as it was to do that, we moved on.

Many years later, my dad passes away after a long illness. I try hard not to be my dad the more I ended up being like my mom.

I'm just as stubborn and opinionated as she was. It took me years to realize I'm just like she her. There are a lot of times we argued over nothing. No one really won. No one really lost. It only brought us closer together.

And i know in my heart, I'll always miss her