Hermatt's adventures in homeowning

Recently, My fiance and I went through the wonderful Trials of purchasing a home. I say that with sarcasm because it truly was hell.
We have been in the house for about four months now and I probably could write a short book about the things we have gone thru so far. A temper mental refrigerator , a busted washing machine, a dishwasher that decided to quit and a few other things that I won't get into.

The experience I am going to tell you happened to me just last night. The fifth of January,
2011.

I am on my way home from work and my fiance calls me. (Please don't yell at me, Yes I did answer my phone while driving.) She was going to start dinner. When I answer the phone, she asks. "Are we out of propane?" Our kitchen oven is fueled by propane as is the grill outside.The only two things in the house that uses propane. I reply " We shouldn't be. I checked it last week and we still have a quarter tank."

You see, when we bought the house there was still some fuel in the tank and anyone out there that knows propane, it doesn't burn away that fast.

I figure that there is just something wrong with the ignitors on the burners. So I tell her to try lighting it with a lighter. No dice.
"I'm almost home, I'll see what's wrong." I say.

A few minutes later I pull into my driveway, gather my things and get out of the car. I throw all my stuff by the side door to the house and go to check the propane tank.

I look over the railing to check the tank and stop.
I could hear the side door opening and my fiance step outside.

"Babe? Did you happen to look at the tank?" I ask.
She answers. "No. Why? What's wrong?"

Now I'm going to censor myself for any young readers.

"Cause it's gone. It's friggin GONE!"

She looks at me like just grew six more arms and 14 more heads. "What?"

"IT'S not Friggin there!"

She walks over next to me. "O poop. It is gone."

Now the first thing that goes through my head is someone stole it.
I could see tracks from a dolly in the snow around where the tank is supposed to be.
I gather my things and run inside.
Who do I call? For some reason I thought of my dad. He's been helping me with little projects around the house and thought maybe for some reason he moved the tank.

So I call my parents house, My mom answers. I tell her what is going on and she laughs.
I don't know what was so funny but she was laughing.
My dad didn't do anything with the tank.

Then it dawned on me. Maybe the company that the tank belonged to took it.
After a minute of thinking, I actually remember the name of the company that was on the tank. I find them in the phone book (yes I still have one) and give them a call.

It was after hours so I kept pressing one till I got one of their emergency operators.
The conversation went something like this.

"How may I help you?"
"Yes, I came home from work today and my propane tank is gone!"
a short pause.
"Excuse me?"
"MY PROPANE TANK IS GONE!"

Notice I actually withheld myself from swearing at the lady. I was proud of myself a little.

"Well, sir. I am sorry about that. Do you have an account with us?"

I went on to explain that we bought the house recently and the tank was already here and had fuel in it.
"Ok sir what is the address so I can look up the account?"

I gave her the address and she finds the account information from the old owner.

After a minute she says. "According to what I have here, a work order was placed on December 28th by a Mr. previous owner to have the tank removed from that address."

"Wait, say that again."

"Mr previous owner placed and order to have that tank removed."

"BUT HE DOESN'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE!"

At this point I happen to wander towards the kitchen and see my fiance standing by the counter and laughing at me.

I still don't get what's so funny about this.
I take a few breaths and calm down a little bit.
The lady on the phone tells me. "If you would like to keep our service we can bring the tank back to you."

"That would be great. Thank you."

I gave her the information she needed and hung up.

My fiance was still in the kitchen and still laughing.
I'm still not finding it funny.

So this morning I received a call from the company again and they are going to bring me a new tank tomorrow. They apologized for all the confusion and actually waived the 125 dollar delivery fee.
So I guess that wasn't to bad.

What really boggles me is why the previous owner would tell them to remove the tank instead of just mentioning that he does not live at the house anymore.
Didn't anyone consider that the new people living at the house would actually need the tank?
O well.
Maybe someday I will laugh at this.


I still don't really find it funny.