Not So Close

While I was in college I used to deliver sub sandwiches for a local sub shop, aptly named “Sub Shop.”  And while driving around all day I would get bored, especially when the radio was broken and I ran out of pot.  So sometimes I would read bumper stickers.  This was a college town and some were pretty clever. 

So one day I’m bored, I’m reading bumper stickers and this car has two or three that are pretty good and one down in the corner that I can’t read because the letters are too small.  As it happens, I was following this car for a while.  And the longer I follow it the more it starts to bug me.  I have to know what this bumper sticker says.  I thought I had my chance when I saw a red light ahead, but then the light turned green, and the car took off. 

Now it’s really bugging me and I start creeping closer and closer trying to read this bumper sticker, but the letters are still too small.  So finally I can’t stand it anymore, I gun it and I’m right on their ass and I can finally read what it says: “Not so close, I’m not that kinda car.”