My Dearest Nemesis

Dear Little Red Riding Hood,

How are you? Are you just fine? Good for you, because—ouch, my frigging back! It still hurts since our last hunt, you... you punk!

Anyhow, when I visited the doctor for my regular check yesterday, he said I stress too much (trying to kill you is a hard job, you know?) and suggests a holiday. “You’re not a young wolf anymore, sir,” he said, “and stress isn’t good for your health. Why don’t you have a little rest in Hawaii, so you can go back to your job with the best condition?”

Well, even though I hate to admit it, he has a point. I do need a rest. I haven't even gone out of this forest for years. I kept delaying my holiday since I dedicated my life solely to kill you. So, after thinking and thinking, I decided a little vacation might be a good idea, after all.

So, Little Red Riding Hood, your death appointment must be delayed until further confirmation—that is, until my holiday is over. I will be back around one month or more, depending on how delicious Hawaiian people are.

Well, have fun. But don’t forget to be prepared: once I come back, I will tear you apart, limb by limb.

Love,
Big Bad Wolf

P.S. Wish you were here, in my stomach.


         Little Red Riding Hood crumpled the letter and released a contented sigh. “Aww, isn’t he so sweet, Mum? Big Bad Wolf left me a message before going! I know he still has a good side, even though he always says he wants to eat me!”

         The mother read the letter again hesitantly. “Well, yes, I guess he is.”

         Little Red Riding Hood’s eyes shone with excitement. “Oh! Oh! And because Big Bad Wolf has gone, does it means I can play in the forest again?”

         She frowned a bit. “Hmm, I don’t know, honey. The forest is still a dangerous place even without the wolf there. You know, there’s still lion, tiger, bear—”

         “Oh, c’mon, Mum! Pretty pleeeeeease?”

         The mother thought about it again. One thing for sure: she didn’t want her daughter becoming a prey of another predator. It had been difficult enough to keep her alive with one wolf pursuing her—what would happen if there were more? No, she didn’t want to have a problem with the other wild beasts at all.

         But she couldn't help herself. Little Red Riding Hood was looking at her pleadingly, and what parent could stand two little eyes looking at her hopefully like that?

         Sighing, she finally said, “Okay, you can go. But make sure you won’t get into any trouble.”

         “Yes! Yes, I will, Mum!” yelled Little Red Riding Hood. She immediately ran into her room to pick up her flower bag, and, not forgetting to kiss her mother first, rushed out of the house.

         For the very first time in months, the world suddenly became brighter. The sun was shining; the birds were singing. There was a rainbow in the sky. Spring breeze blew through the trees and branches waved along the wind. All plants turned even greener than ever and colourful flowers bloomed in each bush—the red of roses and the pink of violets. The bees flew from one flower to another, collecting nectar from each bloom as they move on. Little Red Riding Hood went to her favourite flower garden and spent all day there, playing with flowers and watching the sunset. She was reunited with her friends—rabbits, birds, deer and the other forest animal—and all of them made a huge celebration party—the first one since the Big Bad Wolf had come into her life. She danced with them all night, spending time by counting stars and listening to the turtle playing his guitar. That day Little Red Riding Hood went home very late. She just skipped dinner and went to bed, happy and satisfied.

         The next day Little Red Riding Hood brought a pie to the forest to have a picnic with her forest friends. They continued the previous night's party, even louder and even merrier than ever. They were all celebrating the moments of freedom—something that never happened for ages since the wolf came into the forest. Little Red Riding Hood, who was famous in that forest for surviving from the wolf for months, became an important guest in that party. Everyone made a crowd around her when she told them how she first met the Big Bad Wolf, and they would laugh and clap their hands every time she stopped. Little Red Riding Hood was a bit surprised the Big Bad Wolf didn’t appear from the bushes, thinking how noisy they had become.

         On one occasion, when she was walking deep into the forest, she thought she heard a group of bushes shook a little. She was trembled a bit when thinking it was the wolf again, but then she found out that it was just a little rabbit playing in the bushes. Later on, she got some chuckles when she told the forest friends about her worry. And there they were, spending another day with the most wonderful lunch ever.

         Once again, Red Riding Hood came home a bit late. She realized that her mother had been waiting in front of their house, worried for her safety. Little Red Riding Hood told her not to be afraid—without the Big Bad Wolf around, what was it to fear? Once again, she skipped dinner and immediately went to her room to catch some sleep.

         When she was laying down on her bed, Little Red Riding Hood sighed contentedly. She was satisfied with everything she had had these past days. She wondered what tomorrow would bring, and then she started thinking where the Big Bad Wolf was.

         On another occasion, Little Red Riding Hood visited her grandma again, bringing a homemade cake with blueberry jam—the Big Bad Wolf’s favourite. This time, she purposely walked off the track to pick flowers, just to see if Big Bad Wolf would appear. She waited and waited until the sky began to turn orange, yet the wolf was still nowhere to be seen. Having no other choice, Little Red Riding Hood moved on. She made it safely to her grandma's house, and they had another delicious dinner together as a happy family—just as she had always wished if only the wolf hadn't come into her life.

         But, somehow, Little Red Riding Hood felt very, very lonely...

         Time passed so fast, yet the wolf still didn't make any appearance at all. Even before the first week was over, Little Red Riding Hood refused to go out of the house at all. She just sat down at the corner of her room, moaning and cussing the beautiful world. Her mother grew very, very worried about her, and so she asked:

         “Sweetie? Don’t you want to play in the forest again?”

         Little Red Riding Hood replied with a mumble. “No, I don’t want to, Mum.”

         “But why? I thought you were happy that you could play in the forest once again while the wolf is away. Is something wrong?”

         “I thought so, too, Mom. I thought so.” She sighed. “But it’s just not fun anymore. Not without Big Bad Wolf trying to kill me as usual.”

         “What? But... but why? Isn’t it better for you if he never had never appeared? He wants to eat you and you always avoid him. Now he’s gone for good! Isn’t that what we've always wanted?”

         Little Red Riding Hood took a deep breath. “Yeah, it should be, Mum. Should be.”

         Casually, she opened her room's window wide. The spring breeze immediately rushed in with all its beautiful scent, but even that couldn’t take the smile off her face.

         “Look, Mom. Today is so perfect that nothing can ruin it. The sky is very blue and the grass is very green. The sun is shining and the birds are singing. Why, it is the most, most perfect day of my life!
         “So perfect it is,” she sighed, “until it makes me feel miserable.”

         Her mother frowned a bit. “What do you mean?”

         Little Red Riding Hood stomped her feet impatiently. “Big Bad Wolf,” she added. “It’s Big Bad Wolf. Without his evil scheme, my life suddenly feels so... so empty. I spent my time trying to hide from him, escape his traps and survive from his jaws, and so suddenly... POOF! And he left me behind!”

         Her mother thought about it. “Er... Sorry, sweetie, but I don’t quite understand what the problem is.”

         “The problem!” she suddenly cried. “That’s the problem! He’s my one and only nemesis, Mum! We’re destined to be together—the wolf and me! It’s more than just rivalry—we’re enemies! We want each other disappeared, destroyed and exterminated! I hate him and he hates me—what else can I wish?!”
         She hid her face on her hands and started sobbing. “Oh, my beloved enemy! How much I miss you! My kingdom for a nemesis!”

         Her mother furrowed her eyebrow and scratched her hair. “Okay... See you at dinner, then.” And she left her room, wondering whether her daughter had eaten that morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

         The next day, Little Red Riding Hood was just about to go into the kitchen when she heard her mother calling her.

         “Sweetie? Can you check the mailbox, please?”

         Little Red Riding Hood groaned a little miserably. She was still so sad and depressed that she didn’t want to do anything. She just wanted to have a quick breakfast and went back to the corner of her room.

         But she didn’t have much choice—her mother wouldn't give her breakfast until she checked the mailbox. So, slowly and miserably, she walked out of the house and took a few steps to the mailbox. She even forgot to glance around cautiously, just as she always did when the wolf was still around. But who cared? After all, the wolf was still on holiday!

         Little Red Riding Hood opened the mailbox, but it was empty as usual. She heaved a sigh, hating her mother to make her checking the mailbox every day. What was the point, anyway? Everything she did was opening the empty mailbox—no mail, no tax invoice and no postcard from the Big Bad Wolf. She always felt stupid when she did it. It was just wasting her time!

         Crack!

         Little Red Riding Hood froze. Was that a broken twig she had just heard? Carefully, she began to look around, trying to find anything black and furry between the bushes, but everything looked just like the usual, beautiful day...

         Crack!

         This time she was definitely heard something. But before she could react, suddenly something very big jumped out of the bushes. And before she knew it, she was being held by two big, furry arms with sharp claws.

         Little Red Riding Hood sniffed a little, instantly acknowledging the stench of wet fur she had been familiar with.

         “Hello, little girl,” said the grinning wolf. “Miss me?”

         Little Red Riding Hood couldn’t help screaming and throwing her arms over his shoulders. “Big Bad Wolf! You've come back!”

         The wolf chuckled a little and hugged her back. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Long time no see, huh? How is my favourite dinner, hmm?”

         “Very fine! What about your holiday? You came home early!”

         “Not bad, not bad. Well, it's a bit boring, though. You know, those Hawaiian people were very easy to catch. They didn’t even put much struggle when I boiled them. They’re not fun at all.”

         Little Red Riding Hood giggled. “So unlike me, huh?”

         He laughed again. “You bet they aren’t! Egad, how much I miss your face, your smell and your taste! There’s no one else like you, little rascal!”

         Her face reddened a bit. “Aww, are you trying to flatter me? Thanks, anyway!”

         “You’re welcome, you’re welcome, Sweetheart.”

         And, before she knew it, his eyes suddenly turned bright yellow. “Now! Isn’t this the time I always waited? Now there’s no way you can run away from me! You will end up in my stomach, Little Red Riding Hood!” He laughed again—more frighteningly and maliciously this time. After all, this was something he had been waiting for quite a long time, and the scent of warm little girl at his arms just drove him even crazier.

         But before he had a chance to gulp her down, Little Red Riding Hood laughed.

         “You think so? Well, guess again, my dearest Big Bad Wolf!”

         And, before he could make any response, Little Red Riding Hood spat right on his eyes. The wolf instinctively blinked his eyes, but it was too late—her saliva had gotten into his eyes, and it just didn’t feel very nice...

         The Big Bad Wolf roared in pain. “Aaaaaaaaargh! My eyes! My eyes!”

         Little Red Riding Hood didn’t let go this chance. Just as the wolf’s grip had loosened a bit, she kicked his chin as hard as she could. The wolf roared again as he dropped his little prey. Fortunate for her, she landed right on her legs and quickly rushed back into the house, leaving the wolf still roaring and growling miserably.

         “Curse you, little snack! Just wait! One day, I will chomp you like... like...”

         Little Red Riding Hood slammed the door closed before he could finish his talk and locked it securely. She then ran to the kitchen to find her mother.

         “Mum! Mum! Big Bad Wolf is back!”

         Her mother gasped. “What? Oh, no! Did he try to hurt you again, darling?”

         The little girl just giggled in reply. “Oh, of course he did, Mom! Isn’t that the reason for him to be alive?”

         “Wha—? Well, you’re actually right, but...” She frowned a bit. “Darling, maybe it's just me, but you look so... happy after his return.”

         “Me? Happy? Of course I am, Mum! Now there’s someone who tries to kill me again! Someone who wants to hang my head on his fireplace and tear off my limbs! Now I have my nemesis back!”

         Shrieking hysterically, Little Red Riding Hood ran to her room, skipping in excitement and singing, “I love my nemesis!” She never felt this happy before, and for once, she could see the beauty of the spring again. The sun was shining; the birds were singing. The flowers bloomed in various colours and the butterflies played in the blue sky. It was the most beautiful day ever!

         Her mother stood still at her kitchen, scratching her head in confusion...



MORAL: Enemy is the person who’s always there for you, no matter what happens. They are there to curse you when you’re happy, laugh at you when you’re sad, and celebrate when you’re sick. Still, it’s a wonderful animosity, isn’t it?