Sound of the One-eyed monster

         Here’s a fun thing to try: enter a room full of men and mention sticking anything inside their urethra- anything. You’ll get groans, moans, pretty much every guy will reach for his crotch in an effort to say, “don’t worry, pal, I got you.” In the right setting someone may even puke. But also in the right setting someone may get a look of bliss.
         Beyond the whole “shoving something in your cock” thing, I think a good part of the fear involved is the emasculation that accompanies the thought of being penetrated. It goes against nature: men penetrate, women lay there and think about bills and how dirty the house is, while reminding you to take out the trash in the morning. Nature.
         I’ve never really been one of those machismo males, that grunts and hunts and watches sports all day. Nothing against those guys, I’d just rather read or draw or paint or fuck……or play videogames. So when the beautiful cuddly cuddle-bear, Ms. Di asked me about being her demo dummy for sounding, well…… I shuddered, shook my head vigorously, and said, “No chance in Hell.”
         But I love Di and I know she loves to have fun and keep things interesting, so when I learned that she was having trouble finding someone to sit in and play shish-ka-bob, and that she was just going to talk about sounding for the demo, I did some reassessing.

         A little tid-bit on what sounding actually is for those unfamiliar:
The term sounds takes it’s meaning from the measurement of depth, as in water. The devices were originally used way back before penicillin was discovered to help with the after effects of gonorrhea, which would cause strictures, or narrowing of the urethra. These strictures would cause either difficulty or even the impossibility to urinate. So some docs got the bright idea to shove something into the hole to open it up! (Keep donating to medical science, people. They’ve made strides.) Like any good advancement in medicine and science, some sic……. Ahem!…interesting individuals later decided to pervert the exercise and experiment with sounding as a means of sexual gratification. I’ve heard it regarded as feeling like “you’re being fucked from the inside.”
         I’ve yet to really master fucking from the outside, but what the hell.

         So I did some thinking. I had to dig into the depths of my mind to try and determine what caused the primal fear of this sounding thing. It stunned me a little to realize that the thought of being penetrated was a big part of it. Penetration carries a huge sense of submission along with it. It’s akin to a dog rolling onto its back and offering its soft belly. There’s that trust that’s being passed from penetratee to penetrator.
         This was a new experience for me as I’m usually the one testing the depths, as it were. But not wholly new. I’ve been to the doctor, having needles shoved into me, I’ve had a vasectomy, I’ve got tattoos, and I’ve allowed “Cuddle-bear” to do things to me before. And, like I said, I’ve never really been a “Grr, fast car, big guns” type of male….not that I run around in my wife’s clothes and make-up (while she’s home). So I was able to overcome the emasculation aspect of the ordeal.
         Of course, with penetration, there’s always the risk of contamination and infection. But for some strange reason I trust Ms. Di and will gladly place my penis in her hands…..so long as she isn’t near any clamps, needles, electrodes, crabs, mealworms, scorpions, nails, bats (sports or animal), weights, spikes, tacks, cupboards, etc, etc, ad nauseam.
         So all I was really left with was pain, or the idea of it. The people I’d talked to or heard from said there was very little to no pain involved, but still this was uncharted territory; parts of me hitherto left untouched. Sure those other guys enjoyed it, but they LIKE sounding! I was worried my little guy wouldn’t work anymore. Ridiculous, I know, but the fear was real enough. Then I realized people do this all the time, and people get catheters all the time; they’re fine, I’ll be fine. Besides, “Cuddle-bear” wouldn’t ruin me. She loves my wife too much.
         
         I was on board to be the sounding board. I wrote to Ms. Di asking what I needed to do and her response was to just lay there. That I can do! Then she wrote me and asked if I could decorate it somehow just to make things fun and keep it light. For the next three or four days I was running ideas through my head of what I could do for this. My first thought was to Bedazzle my scrotum so it would look like a warped disco ball, but that costs money I didn’t want nor need to spend. Besides, I’ve got all kinds of stuff around the house.
         For some reason I was up pretty late the night before the demo and slept til after noon the day of. Then I stayed on the couch doing pretty much nothing, not realizing the time that was just passing by. And so it was I found myself in the passenger seat of our Toyota, gluing little red and black fuzz balls, some similar colored feathers, and a single puppet’s (?) eye to my genitalia. Good times! I unveiled my creation to raucous laughter- not the first time my penis has been greeted with such- and explained that it was my one-eyed monster. “Cuddle-bear” was quite pleased, I think.
         Now for the sounding itself… it was…interesting. It requires lots of lube, as the urethra is rather a tender cave with thin walls and tiny, tiny blood vessels. Despite showing off the different sizes of sounds and dilators people use and threatening me with them, Ms. Di used the smallest of the bunch and went for the plunge. I couldn’t help but think of The Matrix when Neo gets plugged in for the first time and Morpheus says, “This is going to feel…a little weird.” I think I may have even reacted much the same as Keanu Reeves. But I didn’t scream like a little school girl, so it’s all good.
         It wasn’t painful per se, there was just intense pressure. And the pressure wasn’t a pushing down type, but more of an expansive feeling, if that makes sense. Not like getting an erection and having a swelling penis, but like something was inside it, trying to push out. A wholly new and bizarre experience for me, that’s for certain.
         It definitely wasn’t something I was getting used to in a hurry, but I had to try and relax. Sounds aren’t pushed in. Once inserted, gravity does the work. But being my first time and, possibly being “on stage,” I had to really work to calm myself and relax. My toes stayed curled. But it dropped right down. She left it in for a second before removing it and lubing up another, different type of sound. This one was weighted at the top, I believe, and, again, I had to force myself to relax. It happened quicker this time, but my urethra was getting irritated. It was beginning to sting a little from about the middle of my shaft to the tip, a feeling not unlike getting soap in the hole while showering and getting a little overzealous with the “me time.”
         So we had to end the show after only two insertions, but I was happy I did that much. I urinated right after, which you should do to flush the system (safety first!). It stung pretty good, but that was the only time, my second trip was normal pissing, save being surprised by the eye stuck on the head of my penis, which I’d forgotten about.  It’s hard to piss and aim while laughing.
         I can’t honestly say I enjoyed sounding, but I can’t say I won’t try it again, just to be sure. That’s the way it is with these things- you just can’t be sure after only one try. Okay, with amputation, you better be damned certain the first go around, but most everything else, you should give a second, maybe even third shot. One day when I forget about the feeling of something trying to rip my cock open (I’m exaggerating...slightly), I’ll give this another go. And yes, everything is in good working condition. The wife has given her tramp stamp of approval.