The Journal of a Soldier: Civil War

July 21, 1861


Today was my first experience in battle.

I saw the falling bodies of my fellow soldiers. I saw the blood pouring down the

grass like a river. I saw the bullets of the enemy collide in midair. I saw the dark

clouds roll over as we were defeated.

I heard the screams of the soldiers as they fell cold to the ground, death claiming

them even before they plunged. I heard the yells of the generals as they

commanded us to move on with our lives and hold nothing back. I heard my heart

race, fear overwhelming me at every corner.

I smelled the remains of soldiers that were and the angels that were. I smelled the

odor of my own vomit. I smelled the decaying flesh of many, which still makes me

ill, even to this very moment.

I tasted the bitter taste of defeat, how that poor soldier had lost his life to the

cold-blooded rebels who shot and stabbed at us until there was nothing left

of us except for our torn minds and battered souls. I tasted fear on my tongue as I

shot at the rebels who, in turn, shot at me.

I felt the escaping of my soul as we fought. I felt the pain of all the ones that had

lost their lives for us, only to lose the battle, only to retreat and leave behind the

injured and the dead.

And most of all, I felt the beginning of war...