Brilliant Jerry With a Big But

   

         It was a rainy day in Lagos when I was on my way to Idumota from Mushin. The rain was so heavy that I could not risk moving to my destination; hence I had to take refuge in a nearby building. I ran to the corridor of a commercial bank in Martins Street to take shelter. I was worried that the man who had given me an appointment for ten o’clock that morning might be out of the office before I got there. Don’t wonder how. He had two official cars and three personal ones. He could use any.

         This opportunity I had of seeing him before he embarked on another ‘operation see the world’ was being hampered by this wicked rain. I almost changed my mind about the existence of God, but I promptly cautioned myself. But why God should allow rain to fall when He knew I had this one chance in the world of getting a job, I wondered.

         I started when someone tapped me on the shoulder, bringing me out of my reverie. I turned back swiftly to see Jerry smiling at me. “What’s on your mind? I’ve been watching you since you ran here for shelter, and you’ve been looking into space. What is the matter?” he asked.

         I served National Youth service Corp with Jerry in the same high school in the Cross River State. He was intelligent and handsome. But he had two weaknesses – women and excessive spending. He had a first class in Microbiology in the University of Benin. He loved beautiful, slim, fair-complexioned girls. And whenever any was around him, he parted with his money like a drunken sailor. He could afford to, anyway. He received additional allowance monthly from his wealthy father during the service.

         I didn’t blame him for not understanding my problem. He had a rich father, so he didn’t understand what it meant to be unemployed for eight months when I thought I’ve made it in life after my graduation. Moreover, I had heard that he had gone for his postgraduate studies in the same university. I managed to smile back. I told him I had an opportunity with a big shot but the heavy downpour was putting me behind schedule.

         “Boy relax! Is that why you’re so worried? You can see him another day, except you want to swim to his office, all the streets are flooded.”

         I swore beneath my breath. I wondered why some people with business acumen hadn’t thought of building canoes for rent in Lagos during raining season. I could have rented one and paddled to my destination.

         “Chuks, I’ve got a hot gist for you,” Jerry told me.

Didn’t I tell you that this boy didn’t understand the type of fix I was in. the sky was still weeping seriously so I asked, “What is the gist all about?”

“I hope you still remember Eno?” he asked.

“Yes!” I replied nonchalantly. I remembered Eno all right. She was one of Jerry’s girlfriends during the service. She was tall, slim, fair-complexioned, and beautifully built with a come-to-bed set of eyes. She was a material for top fashion magazine front cover.

“She gave me a shock of my life last week,” Jerry said.

If you had a shock just last week you wouldn’t be here smiling now, I said to myself. “Yes? What happened? I asked.

“She wrote me once that she was pregnant. But I didn’t take her serious. Three weeks ago, she wrote to inform me that she had delivered a baby boy for me.”

“Is that what you call a shock?” I hissed. It seems you’ve not bothered to check the meaning of shock in the dictionary,” I reproached him. “You’ve got a child and you call that a shock? What did you expect when you were sleeping with her every time as if she was your legal wife?”

“Take it easy, pal. I was just beginning the story.”

“Yes! Let me have the rest,” I said unenthusiastically and impatiently.

“I was in the campus, so I went home to inform my parents. They made no fuss to my uttermost surprise. Instead, my father fixed last week for us to go and see her and my child. A day to the visit, he ordered John, his driver, to wash and polish his Toyota jeep in readiness for the journey, which he did.

“The following day, we were on our way. We drove straight to her house in Calabar. We were told traveled home. I directed the driver and we headed for Ikot, her village. My parents had bought drinks, clothes, baby’s food, baby’s wears and nappies – all a newly delivered mother needed. When we arrived in their house, we met her parents but she was out. Her father sent for her when we asked for her.

“When she came my father explained the reason for our visit. Eno’s parents were dumbfounded. If Eno had a child, she never told them, they claimed. The ball was passed to Eno. She wept for a while before she told us that she didn’t deliver any child.”

“’What?’ my father shouted. A chill crawled up my spine and my body was cold as if a block of ice had been placed at the base of my neck her father asked her why she wrote such a letter. She accused me of jilting her and she wanted to get revenge. I had stopped replying her letter after a month I left Cross River State.

“My father was seething with fury and my mother was dazed. My father ordered that we must drive back to Lagos that night. When we got home in the early hours of the next day, he talked to me like he never did before. He has stopped my allowance till further notice. I’ve some money in this bank; that is what I’ve come to collect when this bloody rain started. Boy! You never know with women. I shall be returning to the campus tomorrow.”

“That was some experience,” I said.

How do you explain to a lion that it’s not nice to devour other animals? “Why did God endow me with sharp teeth and swift movement,” it’ll reply. That was the case of Jerry.