Me and the many selves

Do you remember how you were taught? And who taught you?

You probably don’t. It was me that part of yourself that paid attention to what you yourself wanted to pay attention to.

To trust in me, was never intended to mean put your trust in one body, but for you to look within your own body to find yourself, the one you never escape from the only one you have ever known full time.

We talk to ourselves all the time, we tell ourselves our deepest emotions, what to look at what to pay attention to and who to listen to.

In your own mind you are your teacher and your student at the same time.

You teach yourself what you want to know, not always what is factual.

You seek outside help when you want to be the student and you wish to learn from those around you.

What defines you is not always what you can do but the things you tell yourself that you couldn’t’ possibly ever do, you may well be very capable but self-doubt defines your abilities and half of your character, the other half is a mix of what you know you can do, and what you wish to portray to others around you.

Only you have the deepest personal relationship, and knowledge about who you are.

You are what you eat and you are what you interested in.

You’re me in your body taking the path of your interest getting stopped by fear along the way, choices made at road blocks along the way define our character and create our strengths and weakness.

Your experiences in life and how you have handled them, creatively determined your fuse length which ultimately becomes your individual response to life’s events that have the possibility to ether annoy, excite or frustrate you.

This world produces all different versions of me, all with their own paths and own interest, but basically programmed all the same, in how to view the world and in what way to think and what to think about.

I don’t know for sure but I think there are many messages sent by me or others asking does anyone ells feel the way I feel is there this universal connection?

I get replies through the technology of man in various forms of media and art, some images and thoughts come to me making me believe this world is also real, some things are said to make us all feel connected, yet alone.

Speaking personally I need the world to feel the way it does, I love that I have my own personal space, head space if you will.

I truly believe that all life forms have the capability to communicate with each other through thought alone; at the same time I think I know why we do not consciously access each others brains.

The concept of self and personal achievement is one major driving factor in creating a happy healthy human, we like the ability to claim I did this, or I can do that, if we started to use mental telepathy it would confuse us as to who was speaking and which one was listening, plus would you really know if you were reading anothers mind or just self-interpreting what you think they are thinking.

We developed complex languages for a reason; it allows us to express what we wish without compromising the wish to keep secrets, and have parts of ourselves to be ours alone.

We all feel the need to express ourselves to others, and to have our thoughts vindicated or acknowledged, this is part of a greater need to feel accepted as part of a group, as well been needed within the group.







I hate myself when I get to know who I am and who I pretend to be.

The problem is it is a fine line between knowing which mind is which.

And which one of me is the real one.

There is the me that knows what his eyes and ears tell him, this part knows that the body I live in is that named Antony Peter Kleehammer, I have been with this body and all its changes sense I remember being alive in this world.

Then there is the part of me that is only switched on in the presence of my perception of God or the Devil, who knows? It is this part of me that knows more of what it takes to make this complex world around me happen.

This part, the grater me think more about this world that surround the other me, and wonders who they are and what they are.

He thinks this means that we have all schooled in the same school about how to be the greater me and their own personal me, in a way that works for us all.

Getting people to follow the rules is so easy when they don’t know they are under any form of control, other than their own sense of direction, and knowing when and when not to follow those in the immediate world around them.

I am shore I am not the only one that holds back on what they feel in the presents of others, due to their personal power over you and your life.

No one body on this planet can claim ownership over their own life because we all have to work for one another, to keep our own life living.

Do you know how hard it becomes to look into a mirror, and every time you think of something you see as many ways to look as you can.

I.e. if I thought if one can claim ownership of one body they would have to claim ownership over all that of their surrounds, they have personally experienced in that body, for it is only our interpretation of our world that surrounds us, and all its characters that make us who we are.

One flip side to this is if you own your body and mind then that means you own others, then others own you because what you own that is not yours is a part of another that owns that part of you.

This means we all belong to each other and no longer know who originally said what and created the rules to all our common space, we see as a spherical world that surrounds us and has an endless distance keeping all things apart.

Over time all life on this world has worked out a way to separate its self from its surrounds, but at the same time remaining connected to sum of its surrounds, whilst considering it to be a separate part of our selves, or not a part of us, this allows for the Me & me complex that I have, by jumping to the conclusion that if I show you the greater Me from my mind, you might start to realize who the greater Me is, that is all of us on earth, the family of the Sun.

We have all learned that the story of life remains centered on me, our own personal body & the greater me, this world around us.

We become more able to separate ourselves from the greater me as a whole.

This earth is a big story that is better lived and learned, instead of trying to view its entirety all at once.

Does that mean that living is a dream, a bunch of memories playing out as though in real time by us, for each others benefits, enabling all of us to keep our own personal me?

Early on we all learned that earth is one family addicted to life and death, we discovered the need to kill and eat our family to survive, due mainly to the law that all things dissipate and unless refreshed the battery runs flat.

Given that there is only one power that can never run out but can only disperse into a smaller wave, it is harder and harder to recharge or regenerate the battery supply, or re convert it from dead to alive.

As things deteriorate they go back to their separate selves back to their minerals then elements.

An ever smaller wave deflects of a mirror and bounces off, its reflection is its opposite instead of shrinking it grows into a larger and larger wave intent on expanding forever, Thus allowing for the recharge, or recycling back to new life.

As a human I know from what I see through my personal me, life is a story of having death that supports life.

What we are is biology that keeps it self-content with the need for life supported by death, by make believing we are not killing ourselves or even a relation to us.

But something other than our own personal me, or anything that resembles our own image of how we see ourselves.

If it is a human killing a human it is considered to be wrong, that is unless in the time of war, it is then that we demonize each other to cope with killing each other.

But it is very easy to for most life forms to kill to survive when it is any other living thing that we don’t feel a personal connection to.

The human story is one of a race of earthlings learning to look out for number one, and disassociate themselves from there surrounds.

In a world convinced of the need for death to support life, a begin and an end.

We do what we all need to do to be our Selves whilst not feeling the greater me too much.

I consider myself to be a part of all that exist, I don’t associate with all of the greater Me out of necessity to know my personal me, separately on my own path amongst all the other Selves I try not to be too much a part of, keeping us separated.

I can’t know all of the greater Me, my persona can’t deal with the numbers, instead of the greater Me keeping one self for all, there are many Selves that only know a little of the grater Me each, through knowing their own individual Selves in their life.

God may be everywhere, but unlike god humans like the comfort of only knowing a few at a time, and can only concentrate on the needs of a few at a time.

No one human brain can deal with too many questions at once, each individual has a varying degree of how much input there me can handle.

Sharing the load of the greater me, amongst many Selves, make it easier for the operators of their me to understand what they are

We all are looking for different parts of the greater me, the one that doesn’t exist and still knows all.

I do not know what it is I wish to know from the other Selves the ones I reach out to whilst also pushing them away, too keep us as separate individuals.

Do I wish to know that the greater I exist? Yes.

Do I want me to be the only one to know the greater me? No.

But I don’t want me to be the greater me, not alone any way.

So I guess I am asking for conformation from you the other Selves that I am not alone. Although that is halve of what I wish for.

The other halve is to have a sense of many separate selves that me personally am not a part of unless it is the desire of other Selves to share part of their me with my me, whist acknowledging the greater Me we are all a part of.

I am in love with myself in an odd way; I feel that the gift I try to give to you, the reader of my thoughts.

Is to let you know I exist in you but for reasons I find hard to explain I am better off when we don’t all know too much about each other, and because I think you will understand, and agree we are better off as one that is all, and all that are one.

It this kind of world there is no one person that can be perceived as been alone in power.

Yet instead power is distributed chaotically and unevenly all over, allowing all of us to have a position where we can feel a sense of a lower and a higher form of power.

A pecking order amongst all that exist based manly around the individual concept of one self and there interpretation of what is there morals, what they would or wouldn’t do, with their life.

Determining the individuals superiors, there commons and there undesirables or inferiors.

As a race we are healthy mix that is bordering on permanent insanity due to its knowledge of its own personal destructive side.

That was created when we focused too much on being one with our own me, otherwise we got to self-obsessed by our human self and lost touch with the greater Me.

As a one and only one we are disgusted and we are completely appalled by all the many sides to our self.

This is the problem that I feel god faced.

God considered himself to be all and to know all, and when he seen all, more and more things seamed wrong.

There where parts of god that he saw and didn’t wish to associate with those parts or consider them as being a part of him.

So he tried to erase the undesirable side of himself.

God had to give up his passion for being all, because he kept finding out more and more about things he couldn’t possible see as himself.

This began the time of what god is and what god is not.

God separated himself into good and evil, dividing himself into the self-righteous one with high morale’s and good intent.

His good side only looked at the parts of himself he respected and felt where worthy of being part of.

His evil side was given the rest of his creations, and was told I don’t wish to know them, do what you will to keep this out of my space.

The evil side did what was told of him but vowed never to let the good one forget that it has its own dark side that he will always have to lean on even when he won’t recognize it as himself.

The devil is not really all that evil he is just the part of god that likes to point out the flaws in all and punish the ones god doesn’t like.

We are all human, and we are all god.

Our differences, means that we have all followed one, just different parts of that one, the parts we have seen as desirable are what we all aim for.

And the things we do not like, are the things we manly only see in others.

We have followed our imaginary invisible god perfectly, we are all the same, but in no way alike, and exist in our own space in time.

We are all living in separate individuals shearing common ground whilst existing in our own secret world, only swapping info with others when and where we want.

This world is in many ways perfect.

In the way that we can all deep down know we all believe the same thing but argue and kill each other over how see what we are not in each other.

Agreeing to disagree, is the most respectful we can be to each other keeping our psyche happy that we are our selves making our own choices and on a different path to those around us.

We are each teachers of one another, I think I am a slow learner because I only wanted to find out things from myself.

Not realizing I would teach my self about what it takes to be one self, and learn that I would destroy a part of my self, when I came to the realization that there is no one individual without the support of other similar individuals that helped create each other, together and alone.

I don’t know if I am the first to learn or think this, at times I think everyone is waiting for me to learn this, and then there is the me that thinks this is just my own delusional world.

That nobody expects me to do or say anything, there is not any one waiting for me to make up my mind on what I see as being me, and that this is unimportant to others that I see around me.

To most I don’t even exist, I am insecure, and I am standing in a doorway to many worlds, I do not know which ones of them is just a part of my imagination.

There is the greater me, that knows how things work and then there is me wondering blindly through life only knowing what is explained to me by others in a way that I can only sometimes understand.

Keeping things real and fresh, exiting and unpredictable, just from the joy that only comes from not knowing all of what exist.

I love being dumb because it means that I can never know everything, which allows for surprise and also intrigue about the world keeping the magic alive.

It also allows for the gift of giving self-worth to another by being able to ask questions from one to another about their life and there interest.

We all feed of each other, some times where feed shit and, and other times we are given grate tasting nutrition, that keeps us healthy.

To me there is no denying that we are the characters that we have come across in our lives, alive or deceased.

If we have seen or read about a person in history then we take on bits of their character.

One of the biggest characters in life on this planet is god, all of earth’s religions have their own view of the character of god, and we may not have got this entity right.

Most religions claim that god is a humanoid that created the entire universe.

The part that we did get right for certain is that our god is like us, there is no doubt about it we are our gods, humans have the exact same emotions that there gods have.

Humans have a variety of passionate emotions; I don’t think anyone can claim that they haven’t experience the feeling of great emotional anger when they perceive another has done them wrong.

Nor can they claim they haven’t felt love, compassion, or admiration for another, we all have the same emotions as our gods, and depending on our own personal convictions we will feel the full range each but via differing triggers.