Struggle

The center of my world was getting my next fix,
I never would have thought i could feel that kind of sick.
My mind was shrouded with dark thoughts, my body wasn't mine.
It belonged to the poisons i injected day and night.
I forgot what normal felt like, i forgot who i had been.
My own mother didn't know me, i was overcome with sin.
Rock bottom couldn't hold me, i sank deeper still.
There is no way to describe the way i couldn't feel.
It would have been so easy, to put a bullet in my head.
But my hand was stopped, and here i stayed.
God didn't want me dead.

(to be continued)