Oblivion

Now I Realize, But I don’t know how or why

I’m sitting in one of the world’s greatest cities, as I look outside my window, I see humongous skyscrapers, each extravagant and having a powerful identity of its own.

All sorts of people hustling n bustling on the streets, every one of them are having an impact on this world.

N here I sit having lost my own identity, I’m just a blob of mass with no utter significance

Why am I here where am I going is what I ask to nothingness

In its true sense I have lost nothing, but on another level everything has lost me.

What has become of the self? Where has it gone? Is my soul is in the process of desertion? Am I not alive anymore?

Or have the dreams just seized to exist

I kept on living in oblivion; I thought that another persona had just overcome, whereas in reality there is no other persona, it’s just the one rotten nothingness that never existed, now I realized that the splotch disintegrated a long time ago, it’s just a piece of shit that keeps on moving for no apparent reason.

In a way the dilemma I am caught up in gives me a small meaning, but it’s not supposed to last forever,

What is to be done afterwards?

Was that sin that I committed so immense that it assassinated the soul? Despite everything seeming meaningless and my life having no value, despite me being the something which is more than nothing

Why don’t I have any remorse or regret for committing such a sin?

I guess this is how it was all panned out, I know this is a thread not to be treaded upon, but still I move in agony and joy of the sin, in a way defying all odds, with sort of a satisfaction at a certain level of not being, finally the fence has become a rock slid wall, within which it all has suffocated to death, n in a way here I stand sitting back with no intention to repent or change the past or future.

Has the stain killed the belief?

One Body, which has a blood that stains the world, in a manner that the soul kills faith and dies.

Life was beautiful when it existed, but for how long it can wait, in a body of lies, sins and anguish