No ratings.
some desperate dark mood |
Deep down, I burn I'm on fire, Who set this fire I do not know, Maybe me, maybe someone else, I just don’t know, The fires are slowly swallowing me, It is painful, However...it is also relieving, the pain is a relief, and it assures me I'm still alive, Oh, pain & anguish these are medicines, They just confirm my existence to me. Do I deserve this dark way to go through? Who knows? Anyways now, it is of no use discussing, I have became an addict to darkness& grief, & soon I will be there queen, Its fun living like this, if you know how to control your issues. Darkness it is relaxing, away from all& far from everything. It is the power you gain from living in the darkness. The skill you get, Now I am the queen of desperation & an artist in pain, I rise to the world of light, Insecure people everywhere struggling, fighting, losing, winning, killing, & dieing, I look at these creatures with pity, I owe them, I control them, All this power, All this skill, I am still not satisfied, I go to the evil side, Even drowning the light world in darkness does not ease my hunger, No one listens none understands, I return to my dark zone, Strange feeling tingles my back, I cannot identify it but it felt good, I wondered what it could be, Its happiness the idea knocked me off, Impossible me!? It cannot happen; I am way too immune to such ridiculous feelings, I am sure it was happiness, I panic, Am I becoming weaker? Am I losing my power? I cannot take it anymore, That feeling rips me apart, I am vulnerable, I never was, I could not believe this is happening, I was a superior creature, All my work to become the great ruler of desperation & anguish, It's lost, What ever happened, it made me vulnerable, I tolerate no more, I see the sharp blade, urging me to bring it into contact with me, I do not want to fight the temptation, Drained & empty, I hold the metal, cold & sharp, It mingles with my blood, now merely gushing out, Yes, uhh Again pain, what a great feeling. My view is getting dimmer but I feel my spirit is lighter, Pain everywhere, I feel secure again, I'm no more drained or empty, I'm charged, I lose sensation, I feel nothing No pain, no happiness just nothing, I look down at my body, I rise to the upper world, The light is penetrating me, Burning my soul, I'm on fire, Turning to ashes it’s a relief, Now I know the reason for the fire, I'm back to my old nature, To what I once was, Ashes, From ashes to ashes, From ashes to ashes, & from dust to dust, & from dust to dust, |