Answers

                                                      Answers
                                                By: Devin Stanley

        “So what are you saying Ashley?” “I’m saying that I love you Brian, I can’t take another day lying to myself, just pretending that you’re my best friend and that’s it. Truth is I’ve been in love with you since we were in the eighth grade.” She said right before she started to crying. Then i was like  “So.... why are you just telling me this now?” Then she looked at me and was like “I don’t know, maybe because we’re both about to go our separate ways.” “And then I woke up......... I’m telling you Bobby that was a crazy dream.” “Wow……….. I don’t know what to tell you Brian, that’s a pretty deep dream.” “Yeah I know right, and what makes it even weirder is that I had this dream the same night me and Jessica break up.” “ Yeah dude that is pretty weird, but you also have to think Brian, you two have been friends forever.” “Yeah it’s been awhile I guess.” “Awhile, you guys have been friends ever since you were like five years old.” “So and your point...... what does that got to do with anything.” “So you mean to tell me that you have never felt any feelings for her other than friendship.” Right after Bobby blurted those words out, my mind immediately took me back a couple of days after our senior prom.
Ashley and I decided to meet up at “the hill”; it’s the place where we go to clear our minds when the pressure of teenage life becomes too much. It’s this giant hill that over looks the river. “You know what’s crazy Brian?” “What?” “The dress Lisa Turner was wearing at the prom.” “Yeah really, but did you see the look on her dates face when they were about to take pictures. He had this look on his face like he really didn’t want to be seen with her.” I said while laughing and swatting at the bugs that were flying around my face. “So what’s bothering you today, I know something’s got to be up if you wanted to meet down here.” “I don’t know.” Ashley said softly “Guess I was just thinking about some things.” “Ok, I know that much stupid, what kind of things.” “Shut up!!” she said while pushing me “ Just things……….like I don’t know, after prom I just started thinking about how much things are going to change, and I guess I’m kind of afraid of that.” She said while looking at me and beginning to climb the hill. Slowly I pace behind her, “Yeah I know what you mean, I’ve been thinking about it too.” “So be specific what are afraid of?” she asked “I don’t know, I guess I’ve got the same fears you do.... how everythings going to change, nothings going to be the same; everybody is going to go their separate ways.” “That’s exactly what I’m afraid of, everybody going their separate ways.” She butted in as she was just about to get to the top of the hill. “ Oh my God Brian hurry up you have to see this.”  When I finally reached the top I was almost blinded by the orange glow that coming off of the water.
We didn’t say too much to each other for awhile, just stared out into the river and admired the orange and purple sparkles created by the orange and purple sky. I look over at her why she’s was staring off. “What?” she said as she noticed that I was staring at her. I shake my head “Nothing.” She lies down on the ground and I lay right beside her. She begins telling me about the rest of her doubts and fears and all the people she was going to miss. As she was talking I began staring at her again. “What about me?” I interrupted. Ashley stopped talking and looked me dead in the eyes. “You know I’m going to miss you when you go.” She said with the most beautiful smile to follow. “You’re my best friend." she said while staring deep in my eyes. Complete silence fell upon us as we just lied there staring at one another. Slowly I began to move closer to her, my heart racing with each movement. Before I knew it I was over top of her still staring deep into her eyes. I start to lean in for a kiss and it wasn’t long before she met me halfway. Her lips were so soft and she tasted so sweet. My heart leaped for joy as I fulfilled its greatest desire.
“Wait a minute!!!” Ashley panicked “I can’t, I mean we can’t I have a boyfriend and you have Jessica, oh my God, ok, ummm I have to go.”
                              “Brian”!!!!!!! “Brrrrrrriiiiiannnnnnnnnn, hello, helllooooooo” Bobby kept saying over and over trying to get my attention.“What, I’m still here man.”  “Man I have been calling you for awhile, you okay?” “Yeah I’m fine just thinking.” “Yeah thinking about what I said about you having feelings for Ashley.” “Please........... I was thinking about something else.” I lied while trying to erase the kiss from out of my thoughts.” “Okay……whatever dude, well I have some things to do so I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” “Alright Bobby I’ll talk to you later. After I hang up the phone I go up stairs and grab my shoes. I needed to go for a walk. I couldn’t stop thinking about Ashley. “And where do you think you’re going?” Mom asked. “I’m going to “the hill”.” I responded “Oh, well tell Ashley I said hi, and wish her the best on tomorrow.” “Well if I see her before tomorrow I will be sure to tell her mom.” “Oh, you’re not meeting her there, that’s a surprise.” “What’s that suppose to mean?” I snapped at her “Nothing, Brian are you okay, is there something bothering you. Is it your father?” “No mom.............. I’m sorry .......I’m fine and believe me Ronnie is the last person on my mind.” I said coldly. Then I left. My mind was all over the place, thinking about graduation tomorrow, my future, my dad, and of course Ashley. But the closer I got to “the hill” the less I began to think and the better I began to feel.
It wasn’t long before I got there. I looked at the steep mound of grass and then began climbing it. I could feel the wind pick up slightly the higher I climbed. And the purple and pink sky got brighter and darker with each step I took. I could hear the waves as the crashed upon the rocks. And I could hear the whispers of the trees in the wind as they swayed from side to side. When I finally reached the top, the bright red orange sun was there to meet me. I sat down on the cool soft grass and watched as the sun slowly began to disappear. It wasn’t long before the sun was gone and stars began to appear one by one. Then as time passed by the orange and pink sky was no more the moon appeared, and a black star filled sky took its place. “Hey”!!!!!!!! “Oh my God Ashley, don’t ever do that again.” I said while holding my chest. “You scared the I don’t know what out of me.” “I stopped by your house to see what you were up to and your mom told me I could find you here.” She said while still laughing. “So what’s on your mind?” “Nothing now………I’m fine, just enjoying this moment.” I said quietly “Speak for your self my minds all over the place.” How I ironic I thought to myself, trying my hardest to keep my focus on the stars. “Oh yeah what’s bothering you?” “Well a lot of things” she said while squatting next to me. “I’m happy and scared, all at the same time. It’s like, I don’t know, so many questions not enough answers.” She said with a smirk on her face. “Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.” I said then suddenly realizing how eerie this whole conversation was. “You know what?” “What.” I said while picking at the grass. “I’m really going to miss this place.” “Yeah, me too.” I said quietly followed by an awkward silence. Both of us just gazing out in to the river searching for the answers to the problems like we always do. “New question, same results.” I said “True” she said while laughing. My butt was starting to go numb so I decided to lie back on the ground. She lies down beside me like she always does, and again we didn’t say anything to each other just stared off into the sky. “Hey” “Yeah” I answer back quietly. “This maybe the last time both of us will come here together.” she  says before putting  her head on my chest. Slowly without even thinking I wrapped my arm around her. Once more we didn’t say anything to each other just gazed at the sky. I just held her close. Everything in me was telling me to tell her how I feel. But I couldn’t find the courage to do so. “Do you remember the time we were riding bikes and I fell off and cut my leg.” She asked quietly. “Yeah I remember, I carried you all the way to your house and the next day you showed me your stitches.” I said while smiling “Yeah.” She said with a shaky voice. “Thank you Brian, for always being there for me……………………for understanding me……………………for loving me” she said softly. I could feel the moisture of her tears through my shirt. I tried to answer back but I was chocked up. Tears were slowly forming in my eyes. “ I love you Ashley, with all my heart………….you mean more to me than anything else in this world……..you are the answer to all my question, the answer to all my problems, because as long as you are in my life I know everything’s going to be alright. She lifts her head off my chest and looks me dead in the  eyes “You love me, like love me, love me?” she asked. I just continue staring in her eyes then I wiped the tears from her face. “Yes…………. I love you, love you Ashley, ever since like the eighth grade. I was just too stubborn and stupid not to tell you.” “I’m the answer to all your problems?” “Every last one.” I said “Funny because you’re the answer to all of mine.” She replied.