Home Again

Funny the things you never forget...the moments, the words, the smiles, the laughter...his thoughts took him miles away from the couch he was slumped in. He didn't know how long he had been sitting there, but it felt like a long time. His thoughts took him to the old house he had grown up in. He had been watching the game, and this commercial came on and with that the advertisement had struck a cord of the past. Suddenly his mind had filled with memories that overwhelmed him, while they brought him back to the place he had grown up in. It had been about a year now since he had made the effort to go see what had become of his childhood home. His hopes were to find the old house pampered and cared for...to see children playing on the porch, and to hear the sound of laughter. For him, it had been place of warmth, happiness, and good times. There were nothing but sweet memories, for Frank, from this, his childhood home.

His childhood greatly resembled a picture perfect story filled with good times, mingled with laughter,and filled with close ties. Often he smiled or laughed aloud thinking about something funny from those days. It always was a mixed batch of emotions when he thought of Mom and Dad, and yes, Grandpa. The four of them spent a lifetime together and now that they were all gone. Frank knew that there would always be this big empty void right smack in the middle of his heart. But he would always have all those good times to bring a smile to his face, and yes, a tear to his eyes. The years passing only made him miss them more.

He regretted having made the trip once he arrived at the old house. It was nothing like he hoped and much worse than he could ever have imagined. He walked about the house trying to find a boarded window to peek through. When he did find a little crack through which he could see, the sight of the inside was nothing like he had remembered. It was a sight that devastated him, yet, his minds eye began to paint what once was, and for a moment, a small wonderful moment, he could see Mom making dinner, and Dad coming into the kitchen for dinner giving Mom a hug...how her eyes sparkled. Grandpa sitting in his rocker watching TV. He even seen himself running down the stairs so excited that Dad was home and asked excitedly if they could play ball after dinner. He seen Dad smile. He missed him...he missed all of them.

The land was in as bad a shape as the house as it was now overrun with grass gone to seed, tall flowering weeds, and trash littered here and there. The sight of it he still could not shake.

In his memories, this house was outstanding, and well kept, all safely tucked within the white picket fence that ran all around their land. To Frank, it was all a home should be. Yet, he sat remembering the piece of wood he had accidentally kicked that was on the ground and realized it was a sign that was laying face down in the dirt. He had picked it up and the one word on the sign broke his heart. Where once this house was home, and it was alive with love...it now wore a sign that read, Condemned.

Leaning forward now on the sofa, Frank picked up the remote ending the noise that filled the room. He had lost interest in the game, and wanted to just go to bed. Tomorrow would be another day. With a smile on his face he suddenly remembered Grandpa's advice, "Sonny, in life you live to make memories ... you don't chase dreams, you create them." Frank knew that his family had done just that, and now it was his turn to make the difference for his son. With a fresh determination, he got ready for bed, and before he fell asleep he knew that Grandpa's advice would now become his way of life.

Louise Alberto McAtee

Author of When That Day Comes

http://www.outskirtspress.com/whenthatdaycomes