Find A Way Ch. 5

Five.


I let him pick out the movie as I dialed the number for my favorite Pizza restaurant which, lucky for me, just happened to be Connor's as well. I smiled and asked him what his favorite topping was. He eyed me nervously before he told me anything I wanted was fine. "As long as it's not anchovies or pineapple," he added with a smirk.


"Well, too bad those are my favorite."


He popped his eyes at me before realizing I was just joking. I placed my family's regular order--one extra large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese, two dozen hot wings, and a double order of cheesy bread with lots of garlic sauce on the side--thinking my parents would be happy to have dinner waiting for them when they got home. Connor seemed content with my dinner selection, but I cringed slightly when I saw him pawing through my dad's DVD collection, picking out Kill Bill Vol. 2. His face almost lit up as he took it out excitedly, explaining he never got a chance to see the second one. He seemed impressed with my dads collection of Quentin Tarantino films, which he loved and watched almost religiously. I had seen them all numerous times, enjoying the quick humor but not so much the gruesome blood shed.


I grudgingly took the movie from him and popped it in the player. He squeezed himself down at the end of the couch eagerly as I picked up the remote and sat next to him, trying hard not to lean into him too much because stupid Guster took up half the damn thing. Connor laughed as I cursed my poor dog under my breath repeatedly.


The pizza came at the perfect time, right as someone was about to get an arm cut off, causing the fake blood to squirt five feet in the air making quite the disgusting mess all over someone else's face. I was incredibly thankful for the interruption. Connor got up to help me carry everything back into the living room and I went to get plates and napkins from the kitchen. We sat and ate the delicious food, while watching one of the most rampageous movies I've ever seen in my life for the third, and hopefully, final time.


I didn't pay too much attention to the movie anyway, I was far too much enjoying Connor's reactions to it instead. It was strange how such a violent and hate filled movie could make someone seem to happy and lighthearted, but Connor's smile never faded once throughout the duration of the film. Neither of us spoke much, just an occasional comment about a certain scene, or him making strange noises over Uma Thurman.


I hadn't realized how quickly the time that passed. There were only ten minutes left when I heard footsteps coming up the front porch. My heart fluttered nervously when I realized my parents were about to meet Connor officially for the first time. He turned to look at me anxiously, but I pushed my own nerves aside and smiled at him calmly. "It's fine," I whispered and nodded my head.


My mother opened the door first, followed by my dad who shut the door behind him. Both of them did a double take when they realized I wasn't alone in the living room.


"Hey," I greeted casually, "How was your day?"


They looked at me puzzled, then shot a quick glance to each other before my mother answered. "Fine... how was yours?" Her tone was indifferent, filled with a mixture of curiosity and fear.


"It was good." I paused for a moment, wondering if they were going to say anything else, before I decided I should just explain before assumptions were made. "I needed help with my math homework earlier so Connor came over, and when we were done, we were hungry so we ordered pizza. He hadn't seen the second Kill Bill yet so..." I explained as I pointed to the TV still playing the end of the movie.


My parent's uncertainty lingered for a moment longer before my dad let out a heavy sigh and smiled. "Good movie. I liked the first one better though. A lot more blood," he joked and winked at me. He strode across the living room and took out a slice of pizza for himself. My mother followed behind him with a strange smile on her face.


"So, you're the famous Connor. We've heard a lot about you."


Connor nodded and stood himself up politely, reaching his hand to my mother as she took it willingly. "I hope it's all good things."


My mother nodded. "Nothing but," she said matter-of-factly. "You've helped our daughter quite a lot over the past few weeks. We really appreciate everything you've done."


My eyes popped wide when I noticed he was blushing at my mothers compliment. "Thanks, Mrs. Mackenzie. It's nothing, really," he told her shyly.


"It's more than you know," she assured him. My father nodded his head in agreement before bending over to get a piece of cheesy bread and inhaled the entire thing whole. I eyed him with wide eyes as he did, but he only shrugged before looking at me with an innocent look. I rolled my eyes and folded my arms across my chest.


"Well, it's getting late. Connor should probably be getting home soon," my mother suggested.


Connor nodded his head and opened his mouth to speak, but I beat him to it, "Can't we finish the movie first? It's almost over, five minutes tops."


My mothers face dropped slightly but she sighed and nodded her head. "I suppose that's fine. It was nice to finally meet you, Connor," she said. Connor smiled and nodded as my father picked up the pizza box and my mother carried the rest of the food out into the kitchen.


Connor sat back next to me and let out a relieving sigh. I couldn't help but snort at him. "What?" he asked incredulously.


"You."


"What about me?"


"You're just funny."


"Why am I funny?"


"You were so nervous about my parents coming home when I told you they wouldn't care."


He shrugged, "Your dad didn't seem to mind. I don't know about your mom, though. She didn't seem too thrilled," he said quietly as he eyed me uneasy.


I shrugged back, "She'll be fine. She just takes time getting used to new things."


He gave me a small smile back, and we continued watching the rest of the movie. As soon as the credits started, Connor stood up and stretched himself out. I stood up next to him and followed him toward the front door. He opened it slowly, but turned to look at me before leaving. "Thanks for having me over tonight. It was fun," he said.


I smiled, "Yeah, no problem. Thanks for helping me with my homework," I replied.


He chuckled, "It was nothing. Thanks for the pizza, too. It was really good. I gotta get more of that cheesy bread sometime." I smiled and nodded in agreement. Cheesy bread is the shit.


He hesitated at the doorway for a minute, biting his lip. I eyed him questioningly before he finally spoke again. "We should do it again sometime." He stated in the tone that sounded more like a question. My eyes popped wide and that goofy grin I hated so much instantly appeared on my face. He noticed and quickly decided to add, "You know, just hang out... watch movies, talk, eat, whatever, ya know..." he said awkwardly while running his fingers through his hair, trying to hint to me that it wasn't anything more than it was -- two friends hanging out when they were alone.


I nodded my head in understanding, "Yeah, sure, of course. It'd be fun."


He smiled relieved and waved me a good bye before stepping out into the darkness. My insides felt hollow when I realized he was returning to the cold, lonely, desolate home that stood right next to mine. I didn't want him to have to leave, I wanted him to stay all night so he didn't have to be alone... but I knew he had to go. I took a deep breath, pushing those feelings aside for now, and shut the door.


I didn't even turn the TV off or say good night to my parents before I ran up the stairs to my bedroom and slammed the door behind me. I quickly hit my bedroom light off so Connor couldn't see me from his window jump up and down from absolute giddiness. I fell onto my bed with a sigh and a crash, right along with the biggest, goofiest grin plastered across my face, that stayed there all night long.


Remembering that night was one of those strange things that hurt, yet felt good at the same time. I was so happy and giddy and innocent and, let's just face it, down right stupid... but I felt good. No matter how stupid I may have been, I couldn't deny how elated I was. Even after the conversation my mother had with me the next night, trying to figure out what exactly was going on with Connor and I, my euphoria couldn't be brought down. I explained to her that he is nothing more than my math tutor and a good friend.


"He's just a little... older," she argued.


"Mom, he's not even eighteen yet," I defended.


"He will be soon."


"Yeah, and I'll be sixteen a few months after his birthday. We're barely three years apart, Mom. Two and a half is more like it." She eyed me seriously. "Mom, Connor is one of the nicest guys in our entire school. I mean, come on, aren't you friends with Carole?"


She sighed and shook her head, "Yes, I'm friends with her. But Carole has told me things... about Sabrina and Connor. It just makes me worry a little," she said in a low voice.


I eyed her curiously, "What kinds of things?"


She didn't answer me, instead she looked down and stared at her feet. After a moment, she lifted her head back up at me looking almost remorseful, "It's nothing you need to worry about. Just... be careful with him. I do think he could use a friend like you right now.. I just..." she trailed off. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "It's fine, Skye. Just be careful with him," she plead before she turned and walked out of my bedroom.


The way she acted made me wonder who she was worried more about, him or me?


I forced myself to come back to reality. I lay on my bed staring up at my ceiling trying to block out anymore memories of Connor, and ignoring the evil curtains screaming at me to rip them open, when I heard an unexpected knock at my door. I instantly sat myself up, with my heart pounding in my chest, far too excited about who could be at the other side. I stood up and slowly made my way to the door, reaching my hand to the handle, taking a deep breath before I turned it open.


I let out a giant sigh and rolled my eyes at myself once I saw who it was. "Dude! I haven't seen you at school all week? Where the hell have you been?" A tiny girl who stood at least four inches shorter than me, and skinnier than my fucking leg, barged into my room wearing her signature black jeans and tight pink and black t shirt with some kind of musical instrument on it. Her hair matched her skin tone that was a beautiful European bronze color. Her big brown eyes popped wide at me as she stared me down questioningly.


I sat back down on my bed trying to push down the disappointment rising in my throat. "I've been there. All my midterms were in the morning," I explained.


Matisse made her way to the other side of my bed and flung herself down onto her stomach. She kicked her legs into the air and held herself up on her elbows, eyeing me seriously. "Are you alright, girl? You've been totally MIA lately."


I shrugged my shoulders, "I've just been studying for the exams, that's all."


"Well they're over now! We need to do something this weekend! I heard Tommy Patterson is throwing a party tomorrow night! We should go!"


I sighed annoyed and eyed her, "No, thanks." She knew I wasn't a party person. Occasionally I would tag along with them just for something to do and to get out of my house for a bit, but most of the time I was a hermit. I liked being alone.


"Aw come on, Skye! I know you aren't a little miss party girl, but you never go out anymore and we've missed you. Come on, let's celebrate the end of Midterms and half of the school year being over," she begged. "All of us are going to be there, too. You know, your friends. The people you've been ditching for the past four months to hang out with Connor Davis."


"That's not true!" I defended.


"Oh really? When was the last time you hung out with us, outside of school?"


I paused for a minute before I remembered, "Kaitlyn's birthday party."


"Which was back in December. It's been over a month! Come on Skye, pleeeease!" Matisse begged me. "We miss you," she whined.


I sighed in defeat. I really didn't want to be stuck in a group of people I didn't know or didn't like but, the idea of being able to get out and take my mind off of... things, did sounds like a good idea. "Okay, I'll ask my parents."


She smiled and let out a loud noise that sounded similar to a bird dying, as she sat up and hugged me tight. "AHH! I'm so happy!"


I gave her a small smile, "Yeah... is everyone mad at me?" I asked in a low voice.


She looked at me reluctantly, "Well, kind of. We understand, its Connor Davis, and he is your math tutor and everything, but seriously, Skye, chicks before dicks."


I eyed her incredulously, "Matisse! It's not like that!"


She chuckled at me, "Yeah, yeah. I know," she said with a wink.


"I swear to god it's not!" I promised as I turned to face her seriously, "Is that what everyone thinks?"


She shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know. People talk, people assume, but.... Come on Skyelar! You're with the kid twenty-four-seven! You freaking talk to him through your window!" She said as she reached her arm out to point at it, "You're always so giddy after being with him. You're like.. glowing," she finished obviously.


My jaw dropped as my hand few to my mouth to cover it up. I blinked hard, fighting the tears back, because as much as I wanted my relationship with Connor to be like that, I knew it never would be. Her face fell when she saw the expression on my face and sat up quickly. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder comfortingly, stroking my arm, "I'm sorry, Hun. I thought you knew... Hell, I thought it was true, especially after seeing your sex face..."


"Matisse!" I cried.


"Sorry, sorry!" she plead. "I just don't understand why you're so appalled at the idea.." My face fell in my hands as the tears spilled over as quietly as possibly. I wanted to tell her everything, but I couldn't. No one knew the truth about Connor's relationship with me, and to be honest, I didn't even know what the hell we were anymore. I couldn't tell her about the strange things that happened in his sleep either, there was no way she would understand... and not tell anyone.


I lifted my face up to meet her gaze, "Connor and I ... are at kind of a stand still right now," I admitted.


Her face fell in shock. "WHAT? Why? What happened?" she asked.


I shook my head, not having any idea how to explain. "We just ... I don't know. He's going through a lot right now and he asked me to give him some space." That was the best I could do without giving her too much detail.


However, I knew she would ask, "What's going on with him?"


I sighed and eyed her seriously, "He's dealing with a lot of shit right now. What happened with his dad... and Sabrina..."


Understanding hit her as her face straightened out and she nodded. She didn't say anything else about Connor or ask anymore questions, she only looked up at me hopeful before she spoke. "Well, Honey, it sounds like you need a night out with us! Ask you're parents if you can sleep over my house tomorrow night and give me a call, okay?" she ask as she got up from my bed and headed toward the door.


I smiled and nodded my head, knowing full well my parents would say yes.