George Bush

Straight from the diary of acclaimed president George W. Bush...

Dear Diary,
         I would like to take this time to, uh, recollect upon my day, he he. We caught that damn S.O.B Saddam and stuff. Found him in a hole, you see? Now Cheney will finally get off my balls, he he. Anyways, we haven't really found any WMD's yet, but Cheney promised me they were near the oil mines, so I think we're pretty close. Cheney also promised me that Muslims are secret aliens, so I still don't really feel too bad killing them, since they're trying to take over planet Earth and all. And it really makes sense when you think about it, cause only an evil alien mastermind would be able to pull off a 9/11 on the best country ever made. But I'll get those damn Ewoks if it's the last thing I do. It's kinda been a rough day though, since Laura caught me cheating with Hillary last night, but luckily woman don't really have opinions so I think I'll be okay. Also, Cheney bought me this new toilet paper which I think was meant to be a joke, considering it was really rough on my bum and it had all sorts of writing on it, talking about things called ci-vil li-ber-ties and a bunch of things titled a-mend-ments. That Cheney sure is a sneaky S.O.B, he he. Well, until next time.
Love,
Georgie