Lion of (b)rain forest

Boss.. Oh my god what an ancient creature, I'm sure bosses are existing since 11th ice age (not sure if there is something like 11th ice age, who cares). Boss..Boss what a beautiful word, bosses come in different shapes, sizes, colors and now in different experiences. Lion used to be the boss of jungle now the Project Manager is the boss of protected (b)rain forests and we are the animals on whom he feeds. He likes eating fresh kill but hopefully I'm too old to be a good food.
"..well you know? You don't know what's expected of you!" now the lion of this jungle speaks, I'm here in his office, listening to this crap for last 15 minutes.

I know my game is over but for grand pa Darwin's sake I have to run till my energy last, after all we have to make sure that our future generations are healthier and for this we have to take our last stand (survival of fittest).
hmm... I should take the last stand
"I don't understand" here I come devil " what exactly is expected of me?"
Ohhh... my gosh he isu going of eat me, why is he staring at me like this, I don't care if there is no promotion.

"Got you!! Now you are admitting that you don't even know what is expected of you?..." now this bull will keep on coming after me
"..and when you don't know the expected then you should be ready for the unexpected and once you are ready for unexpected then you should go and watch the B rated horror films rather than wasting company's as well as mine valuable time disscusing your promotion."

Am I still alive, such a bad analogy, but this Lion king has given me a weak point, I need to ask him the right question and he might be tamed after all
"Can you tell me what's wrong with me apart from my love of unexpected.."
"You are a disaster!" how can he say that I need to fight, fight for the survival my species, the workers
"How?"
"Your work is not up to the mark, never have you met the criteria!"
"Can you be more specific, when I wasn't upto the mark."
Yeah, my survival instincts were true, he is confused now, he hasn't spoken a word for 577 mili second, he is looking here and there probably now I'll cage him.
"well..this company works on horizontal and vertical, but when bottom line is not good and Burn Down chart has gone somewhere,horizontal has slipped and vertical is nowhere,its in sky..." shit I under estimated the power of second hand management books, no . no..
"Take the inflation pressure;cost push inflation and demand pull inflation in the picture couple with falling CMM levels and you will understand the specifics of the problem." I have to admit I've lost, I'm at his mercy, I'm ready to do anything to be spared of this jargon shit.
"Got it now?.. U now understand what is the problem with you and your performance. Now I guess you know what is expected out of you!!!"

Lost cause but I have to speak some thing.
"What is expected of you?"
"I'm expected to be the husband of bitchy wife! Father to a 'son of a bitch' son and I'll buy new Cadillac this year or over next."
Wait I can hear the clapping sound
"I means what you do as work, in the office."
"Well, I come to office and check the mailbox.. after all everybody reports to me. Then I have a meeting with all the guys to find out the status of their work.Then I have to meeting with the client to find out what all meetings they want and with whom. Then I have a meeting to find out what is the status of sales and the sales guys meet with the respective team to do the work. Then I have meetings with the idiots like you in the company who don't know what is expected out of them. Then I have a meeting with my executive committee to decide what all meetings I need tomorrow, See how busy I am"

I should start moving out of the door now, by the way I should give him a parting shot, at least I should humiliate him
"so you mean to say that you take the maximum salary and practically do no work?"
"That proves my intelligence."