The Touch

It was getting dark. The sun was beginning to set. I knew that it would look wrong in the eyes of everyone, but my desire was growing stronger. I wanted to touch him ever so slightly. Just softly brush my fingertips across his hand. Would he notice? Would he feel a shudder of delight? The vehicle was crowded and we were already sitting so close. Would anyone see?

I lifted my head up looking around to see what everyone was doing. Everyone was oblivious, locked in their own world. If I did it fast, no one would notice. I sat there with my left hand glued to my jeans, fighting my own desires for fear of the unknown. I knew we would be in the car for awhile. I had plenty of time. But the longer I waited, the shorter time I would have enjoying the touch.

“Ok, Showtime!” I thought. I reached over with my pinky and placed it barely on top of his hand. His hand jumped just a little. I froze. I held my breath. I looked away, as if I didn’t realize I was touching him, but I still left my hand where it froze. I could feel his gaze on me and I was dying to know what he was thinking. Dying to turn around and look, but terrified as well.

I continued to stare into outer space, while looking out the window. Not really seeing what was in front of me. I moved my hand again, a little further onto his hand.
” He had to know now” I thought. Then I felt it, he moved his hand onto my leg. My heart skipped a beat as I turned my head towards his direction. He was looking right at me, and his eyes caught mine. A subtle grin crossed his lips and mine as well. I turned my face toward my lap. I knew my face was red from blushing and my head was screaming at this point. “Breathe, Breathe, Breathe”

I soaked in the warmth of his hand on my leg. I moved my hand until it completely covered his. I then curled the ends of my fingertips over the side of his hand. The softness of my skin touching his warm strong hand sent a chill down my spine. I could not stop smiling. I knew I had to in order to stay undercover. So I took a deep breath and straightened out my face. “Maintain your composure” I thought.

We sat comfortably in the car, watching the sun set. It was just dark enough in the car that no one could see our hands. We were in control. We were touching. And we were happy. The music on the radio was enough distraction from the excitement that was building inside me.

The sun had faded into the mountains and darkness sumberged. The night was beginning to take it's toll. Everyone around us began to slump into their seats. Looking to the front of the vehicle I could see the two of them were no longer taking part in the conversations of the evening but dissapearing into the darkness ahead. I knew that they would no longer be looking towards the back to take part. Everyone was becoming sleepy.

He looked at me and smiled. Knowing that vision was limited, I smiled back. Almost as if we already knew what each other was thinking. He removed his hand from my leg and grabbed my hand. I grabbed his hand intensly. No longer worried about those around us, but more concerned that he would let go. I glanced around to see who was still awake. A few more, holding on to the shred of light that glowed in front and around them from the headlights and the cars that drove past us in the dark. I knew it wouldnt be long until everyone was asleep. Including us, unfortunately.

I didnt want this moment to stop. I wanted to cherish it forever and ever. I had no idea if it would ever repeat itself. I grabbed his hand a little bit tighter. I felt a small lump in my throat but chocked it back thinking "dont be ridiculous". I looked up to him again, wondering what he was thinking when he reached in closer. He made a quick glance around to see if anyone was watching, then he brought his lips slowly against mine and pressed them against me. "Oh how soft and romantic" I closed my eyes, wishing the moment would never end, but suddenly opened my eyes to see if anyone had seen.

We were safe, for now. "Did anyone see?" I wondered. I searched all around. Looking to see if anyone's eyes were open. So far, nothing. Besides the driver and passenger, we were the only two awake. And from what I could see, they thought we were sleeping too. Satisfaction creaped through me and I relaxed more. Knowing that we were the only two in the backseat that were still awake we let our sense take over. He reached across my cheek to rub his hand against it softly, then once again kissed me. I closed my eyes, lifted my head and took in the sweetness of his tender kiss.

Suddenly from the seat behind us we heard some stirring. We turned to the front, facing forward, acting as if nothing had happened. He glanced behind me to notice that it was just one of them stirring in their sleep. We were once again alone.

Feeling the darkness and drainage from the long drive we slumped into our seats. Still holding hands he put his head onto my shoulder. I could feel the slowing of his breath against his chest against my arm that I had put over him. I could feel the heaviness of my eyes fighting for sleep. I feared falling asleep because I didnt want this to ever end. I also feared falling asleep in this position to those who may wake up before us and start gossiping. I had to decide which was more important.

Then he moved his position. I dont know how he managed it, but we were in each others arms. He slumped, comfortably to the floor with his head against my chest. My arms comfortably around him in an embrace. One that wouldnt release no matter the force. We were comfortably in each others arms, as best as we could be in such a congested area. I only imagine how it would have been if we were honestly alone.

He had fallen asleep in my arms, and me somewhat in his. I was content, I closed my eyes and fell asleep. No longer worried about what would be said come morning time, or the gossip that would there in turn consume. I was completely and utterly happy.