Regrets

I know it may sound corny, stupid or naïve

A little bit of everything, it’s hard to believe

But know I truly loved you, and that I still do

And hope and pray that one day, you could love me too



I want to say that it wasn’t my fault

That my family, and upbringing had caused the jolt



But truly, to be honest, I should have seen it through

It should have put my life, on the line for you

I should have told them all, family and friends

That there was a newest member, coming to meet them



Shamefully I hid you, from all the world to see

And only told your daddy, where you were going to be

We had to think of something, we were running out of time

So I took you to a lady, and she promised you’d be fine



She told me about your family, that they would love you too

Like their own child she said, don’t worry, don’t be blue.



I was helping someone, giving them a life,

To love and teach a cherish, this husband and his wife

For they were not so lucky, like I was with you

They could not have children, until they met you



I regret this daily, and pray for your growing soul

That one day you’ll forgive me, before I am too old



I wonder daily, with this mark left on my heart

Could I be a parent after leaving you from the start



It’s been a few years now, and time’s been marching on

But I’ll always remember you my son, you are never far gone



Knowing that I was so young, so

impressionable and so dumb

Please try and understand

That if I could turn the clock around

I would have stood my ground



I would have held you in my arms, and watched you grow

To be a football player, in the summer, autumn and snow



I wish you happiness in life, my son, although I’ll never know

May God always keep you in his arms and glow



You deserve a special life dear, filled with love and peace

Hopefully in your heart son, that will never cease.



I see your face daily, filled with a loving smile.

I try to imagine if it’s my mouth you are grinning with in style

I remember your blue eyes, windows to the soul

And now that I am older, I know, without you, I will never be whole.