Mothers Day

Once again, that day is here
The annual rebirth of my memories of you and all that you held dear.
Once again that hateful day is here
Those buried emotions all becoming clear.

Reawakening this burden that I cannot share, can never undo.
That time I saw you last, when I rushed away unwilling to stay.
You looked at me with fear in your eyes, the first I had ever seen
You were always so much stronger than me
My mother, my Valkyrie

I could not hide the horror in my eyes and like a coward I chose to flee
Ignoring the desperation of your silent plea.
Reaching the safety of the street, I looked around
You stood there waving as you always did, 
The darkened doorway behind you appeared as ominous as a grave.

I did not stand beside you while you fought your last
I could not find the courage to watch you fall
There was no last goodbye, no last I love you.
Why did I choose such a selfish path?
I had failed you in so many ways before, but most of all at the very end.
Was your last thought “where is my son?”

Once again, that day is here.
My day of shame for an eternity
Tears roll down my cheeks, but not for her.
These are for me.