As I sit here listening to music our old song comes on and flows through my mind I start to think about all the times we had the time we kissed under the mistletoe when we went skinny dipping in the ocean as the tears begin to roll down my cheeks I think back to our first argument and how I knew I would never love someone the way I love you but I remember how I pushed you even though I knew how much pain it caused you as I stand here in this field listening to our song blaring from my truck I look into the sky screaming why it should have been me, not you the tears begin flowing out of my eyes I keep yelling its my fault I remember sitting in the house waiting for you to walk in the door but when you didn’t and my heart broke into a million pieces then I would hope that maybe when I fall asleep you would quietly slip into my arms but when I woke up alone I would sit there crying because I knew that I would never hold you again I sleep with your picture next to me when I get lonely I spray your perfume to get the feeling of you in the house within my grasp and I get taken back to that place of perfect harmony when I got to hold you in my arms I’m on my hands and knees shouting I cant go on anymore I cant accept the fact that the past is only memories now I will never be able to find the courage to ever love again I imagine kissing you in my truck as our song comes to an end I wipe the tears off my face fighting back the urge to breakdown again as I look into the sky the rain begins to come down and I know your watching me I know in my heart ill see you again but no matter how hard I try the tears find a crack and seep through as I stand here thinking about you |