Saint Angelina Jolie

      *Angelina Jolie?


      "What?" Angie sturs in her bed. She sits up and squints at the clock: 3:00am.
      Perhaps, it was one of her children calling for her. She rings her nanny. The children
      are sleeping. It's back to bed.


    *Angelina Jolie?


    "O.K. Who the hell is it?"
    She calls security. They will make a pattern search of the grounds.
    "Where is Brad? Oh, off making a film. Damb it."

    *Angelina this is the Lord.


    "Wherever the mike is, we will find it!" Angie cusses and stands in her gold silk
    panties, holding her black 45cal. in her right hand. "Jesus Christ! Where is the
    security?!" Several men in uniforms burst into the room. "Oh. Ah. Sorry." they
    turn from her naked breasts. "Hey! Just search the room!"
    she grabs her gold night gown and throws it over her slender figure.

    "All clear." the sergeant barks at his men to withdraw.

    *Angelina this is the Word of God.

    "What?" the sergeant stares up at the ceiling. "You heard it too?" she smiles.
    "Yeah. You'd better go to the east side of the estate." he makes hand signals
    to his men to go onto the roof. Angelina walks briskly down the east wing with
    three gaurds.

    *Angelina.

    An Angel blocks her way. The gaurds fall into a sleep.
    "Shit." she spits out the word and looks for an escape.
    "Why are you here?" she asks. Her head is spinning.
    The hallway is filled with a bright light.

    * I am the Word of God.
    The Lord hath done great things for you.
    Now you shall come home to your people.
    And bring peace to Isreal!

    "I'm not Jewish." she answered softly adverting her eyes,
      holding her head. The voice shakes the walls and floor.
   
    *You are my child.
    I have chosen you to do good to those who are good.
    I have joined you with the tribe of Judah.
    Into thy hands you will make justice!

    She crawls accross a street covered in stones and glass. There is gun
    fire and rioting. Young men throw rocks and wicked bottles filled with gasoline
    at tanks.
    "Help! Get me out of here!" her tiny fist pounds on a tank. "What? Some
    whore is trying to get in." a voice spoke in Isreali. "Keep it shut! Let's go." another
    voice hollerd in Isreali. The tank speeds away.

    Angie starts to scream. A door opens from a store front, "Are you mad?
    Get inside!" a man beckonds in Palestini. She hops as her feet cut on the glass
    in the street. "Oh, my God thank you." she gasped. A woman aproaches and
    coveres her with a blanket.  " Are you from Haffa? What are you doing here?"
    he asked in Isreali. "I speak english." Angie sat as the woman removed bits
    of glass from her feet.

    "I.. was sleeping. I heard a voice .. and called for help." tears streamed down
  her face "Ehm. I am Ramone this is my wife Sasha. We sell wood carvings to
  tourist, but there aren't many now. Would you like some tea?" Ramone's wife
  offered tea. Angelina sipped the warm honey tea and smiled, "I'm Angelina Jolie."
  Ramone and Sasha smiled. "You don't know who I am?" she asked in amazement.
  "Well, your very beautifull, but your only a girl of fifteen or sixteen." Sasha answered
  with a toothy smile.

    "Mirror! I need a mirror!" Angie was desperate. Sasha roled a full length oval mirror
  to her guest. She stared at the teenage girl in the mirror. She looked nothing like
  her. She looked Jewish. "God! What the Hell are you doing to me?!" Angie looked
  at her belly there was no evidence of child birthing. "We should call the police.
  They will locate your parents." Ramone dialed the phone. "Call Brad Pitt. I have his
  cell phone number." Angie recited the number to Ramone and he handed her the phone.
  "Yeah? Helllllooooo!" Brad was impatient.

    "It's Angie. I'm stuck in a warzone on the West Bank. Get my butt out of here."
  Brad paused, "You don't sound like her. What's the password?" Angie took a
  breath trying to lower her voice, "Emergency Cancelation Archamedes." Brad laughed,
  "Do you have a cold?" "Just send a plane!" her voiced screeched. "O.K. O.K.
  I'll be there.. where are you?" Brad was certain he was not speaking with wife,
  but the password was right.

    He assured the girl on the phone that help was on the way. Then, he called the
  the FBI and explained that his wife had gone missing from their estate and a girl in
  Palestine had used a password that only he and his wife knew. A few hours later
  the girl was being held by the Isreali police in Tel Avi. "I was sleeping and then
  God spoke to me and sent me here to bring peace..." Angie begain to sob.
  The police called for a child psychiatrist.

  "Wait! I can prove I'm God's messenger. God? Answer me!" she pleaded infront
  the psychiastrist. "A Messiah complex is very common here, but how did you get the
  password?" Dr. Strause; child psychiatrist, inquired without a sufficient answer.
  The Isreali police sent her to the FBI at the U.S. embasy. After a long interogation;
  she was sent to a mental hospital.
 
  It was 3:00 am.

    "O Lord, who art in Heaven. Please answer me. What do you want from me?"
  her fingers clutched tightly in prayer.

    *Unless the Lord watches over the city,
    the watchman stays awake in vain.

  "Huh? Sniffle. I don't know what you mean?" Angie looked up to the light bulb in
  the ceiling.

    *Behold how good and pleasant it is
    when prosperity shines apon you.

  A brilliant flash filled her cell. Instantly, she was returned to the bedroom of her estate.
She raced to her mirrored wall and laughed for the joy of her own image.
"I must write this down. It will be a great movie." she rang for her maid;
"Brad will be getting a welcome that'll knock his socks off!"

    {Palsm 137:1-7}

    *By the waters of Babylon,
    there we sat down and wept,
    when we remembered Zion.
    On the willows there
    we hung up our lyres.
    For there our captors
    required of us songs,
    and our tormentors, mirth, saying,
    "Sing us one of the songs of Zion!"


    Angelina fell to the floor and wept, "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those
    who sinned against us."

   

 

    =+=