With a sonorous clang
the old church bell rang -
no dinky old doorbell for me -
so I flung the door wide
and invited inside
a guy with a message for me.
With a pitch pipe in hand
he obviously planned
to lyrically finish his mission;
so I told him "Okay"
and a "C" he did play,
having asked and received my permission.
"Mister William McDuff,
we've had quite enough
of the drivel you send us to read.
Kindly cease and desist
or our next little twist,
rest assured, will be deadly indeed."
Somewhat taken aback,
I told the guy - Jack -
that those greeting card guys liked their fun.
Jack replied, "Please take note!"
and he opened his coat
to expose a quite shiny new gun.
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