Bisheggagah

                    "A hen lays an egg on a festival day following the Sabbath.
                    May one eat the egg? One should not profit by illegal work
                    done by the hen.
                    Again, suppose a cripple has a wooden leg. May he use this
                    device on the Sabbath?"


      Cindy looked cross-eyed at the sacred text, "Well, that's silly. God doesn't
      punish people for eating eggs or using a wooden leg." A great trumpet blew.
      Cindy's room was filled with tiny Angels. "Who-who?" she ran for the door.
      It would not open. "Do not be afraid. We are The Holy Innocence, come to give
      you good news." the Angel announced and flew over to Cindy. Cindy tried to
      swat the small intruder with her feather duster, but he fluttered his four wings flying
      to and froe.


      "Holy Innocence are we.
      Put to the sword by
      Herod.
      Martyred for the
      infant Jesus.
      We dwell forever
      between Heaven and
      Earth."


      Cindy's jaw dropped open, "I-um, sorry. Would you like some jelly beans?"
      Her hand trembled as she pointed to her bunny' jellybean jar. The Angel landed
      softly on Cindy's nose. "The tears of the Lord rain apon the unGodly. There
      will be a great breaking of the land and many shall fall." The Angel shook his
      finger at her. "Maybe... you should go see Obama. I'm just a girl."

      Cindy spun about with a mighty whirlwind, "To thee, O God we will give praise
      apon the harp and vanquish thy enemies!" the Angel declared. "My mom is
      going to be very angry; Eeeek!" she slammed into the ceiling. Jellybeans bounced
      off the walls as her glass bunny exploded. Cindy grabbed the ceiling fan and gasped
      as the neighbor's house slipped into a hole. "This is not right! They were
      NonDenominational!" she cried.

      "But, you are a Jew. Chosen by God to be elect from all people." the Angel
      carried Cindy back to her bed. "You are the chosen. You will have a daughter
      and call her Leah. And she will save the nonbelievers." Cindy desperately tried
      to kick off the Angels, but they swarmed over her. She could hear harps and
      her mother pounding on her door, "Cindy! For Christ's sake open the door! The
      whole neighborhood is sliding away!"

      Cindy open the door. Her mother grabbed her arm and raced outside. Their
      home, adorned with Christ-Mass lights, slid backwards into a mud slide.
      "Mom, can I have some pickles?" Cindy queeried.


      :)