Urge

Sometimes we can't overcome things on our own.

Dad was at work and his mom and sister were upstairs cooking dinner as the boy sat in front of a computer in the basement masturbating before pictures and videos of naked goddesses. When he finished, he cleaned up and deleted the history. He kept his eyes open when his dad prayed before dinner. He sat huddled in a corner of his bedroom rocking and crying. I'm sorry jesus, he said. I'm so sorry. I won't do it again, I don't want it anymore, god, no more no more jesus I don't want to do it anymore. Create in me a clean heart, please jesus I need you, he prayed. He went to bed smiling and singing and his sister said she had never seen him in such a good mood. That night he lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. His neighbor left the yard light on and it was keeping him awake. He felt his tool pressing against his boxers and he tried to focus on the ceiling and the yard light and whatever else but it was no use. Everybody was asleep and he walked downstairs and watched three-ways and blowjobs and lesbian fucking and stripteases and cumshots until his toes curled in ecstasy. He went to bed and his neighbor turned the yard light off so he could sleep. He was very tired and he slept like the dead.