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Rated: 18+ · Fiction · Comedy · #1494512
Having forgotten to drain the backyard pool, Corinne discovers surprise residents
Other breaking news: Yesterday I went out to drain the inflatable backyard pool, which has been left full for two or three weeks. He had promised that he would drain it. Sure, he had promised lots of things. I spied it from the kitchen window and it looks like pea soup in there. It’s not even transparent or translucent green. It’s OPAQUE. Gyuk. Okay Corinne, this is your life and your home, and you can deal with stuff. Without him. One thing at a time. You don’t have to scrub the pool today. Just pull the plug and let it drain out. One step. To quote someone else “Yes we can”. Oooh, how motivating…. So I walked out to tackle the problem, and reached down to put in my hand and open the drain. All of a sudden there was movement everywhere, so much so that I jumped back. I looked down and saw hundreds upon hundreds of little tadpoles swimming around in there. Like giant black sperm. I laughed to myself……. Leave a problem long enough without dealing with it and it will morph into something entirely different. Or maybe the lesson is, let things go awhile and new life will take over and make a new start from your old junk. Cosmic recycling… Hmmmm. Dunno. You know what…? I don’t know what the lesson is. Guess that’s ok. I’m not a fucking guru and I don’t have to be. Probably freak people out anyway if I become any more introspective than I’m already becoming….. I decided to leave the tadpoles alone and let Drew see them. Risky choice, Corinne. Once you do that, you’re going to be either obligated to see this thing through to froghood or fess up and explain to your son why you killed 10,000 young amphibians……. You sure you want to do this? Ah… er…. no, not really…. but……. uh….

After school, I just said, ‘Drew, you should go look at the pool, there is something cool there. I think you’ll like it.’ He raced back behind the house, still clutching his lunchbox, and then squealed “mommy mommy, TAAADPOLES!!! How did they get there??? How mommy? How?”. I told him the momma frog must have laid her eggs in there. And now they’re growing into frogs. Millions and millions of them. (God, it’s going to be like the plague and in the backyard…… is it??... cockroach invasion in kitchen, frogs taking over backyard. Jeez o man, please do not send in locusts….). Guess we’ve got an unintentional backyard science project going on in there, now. (Which makes up for the totally failed Luna-Moth experiment a few months back, I guess….. Almost lost a dentist over that one…..).

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