Understanding

One day, not all that long ago, I woke up and realized that I lost everything that mattered most to me. 16 years and absolutely nothing to show for it. That's when it hit me, I need to change. I couldn't keep living the way that I was, the way that I still am. I can't keep carrying on with this guilt, this shame, this regret. I've quit everything I've ever tried, I've given up on everyone I've ever loved. I've done so much wrong but now, it doesn't matter. I'm moving forward. I won't let anyone or anything hold me down anymore, I'm cutting the string. I'm embracing my life as myself. It won't always be wonderful, but I can always be strong. And just so you know, I'll always be scared...

~

I open my eyes and feel an instant surge of panic come over me. Where am I? My head hurts and I need to pee so I get up of the floor and search for a bathroom. I open the first door I find and no, it wasn't a bathroom, it was a bedroom and I can now tell you that naked fat guys aren't pretty to look at. I quickly closed the door and started looking for another one. After tripping over people that obviously crashed on the floor like I did, I finally found the toilet room and relieved myself.
I turned the sink on and splashed my face with cold water while I desprately tried to remember the events of last night. I remember leaving my house and going to Joey's for a party, but this is definitly not Joey's rich parents mansion. My eyes turned red as tears started to form. God, I'm so stupid! My stomach started to churn, "I'm gonna puke." I said it outloud. I tried making it to the toilet, but didn't and ended up vomitting in whoevers cat box. Why didn't I just use the sink? Shit.
Next thing I know, knock knock, someone's at the door. Not even bothering for a response, they walk in, "Happy hangover, want coffee?"
My God, he's gorgeous...