A Beginning

Chapter One:
Ellie sat, legs curled, head propped comfortably on a feather pillow, in the bay window of the great room that her mother so affectionately called the window of light. The morning sun was brilliant, warm and merry and made no bones about Ellie soaking up a bit of it. A book was propped open against her legs, the pages turning slowly, lazily. Summer was winding down quite pleasantly.

Father was coming home this autumn. The idea made her shift anxiously. He'd been away on business for nearly three months working on a merger on the other side of the country. No one said it, but he was dearly missed. The smallest reason being they had not had a party in the home since he'd gone. More than the family had commented on the lack and Mother was thoroughly distraught.

She let her eyes drift from the small printed pages and out the window to the street. Father should be back any day, then everything would be back to normal. Her sisters could both go back to suggesting which gentlemen he should invite, and how often and she could go back to engaging her cousins in intelligent conversation.

Any day. Ellie's own particular anxiety was that it was hard to maintain a household when Mother was so distressed and she was left to look after nearly everything.

She closed her book and set it aside, then smoothed her skirts over her knees impulsively. There seemed nothing to do but wait, though she wished that were not the case.

She was kept from turning away from the window when a coach pulled into the lane at the edge of the property. She recognized it only because it belonged to her father's employer. He only visited if there was something very important to tell Father.

"Mother!" she called behind her into the house, "Mother, come quick! Mr. Charles is here!"

There was a pounding on the floor in from the drawing room and pounding from the rooms above, her sisters who'd heard as well.

Ellie remained calm. Perhaps Father was being escorted home by Mr. Charles, but in truth that was highly unlikely. Mr. Charles being here at all meant something important had happened, and perhaps he thought Father already home. That too, was highly unlikely. Mr. Charles kept a rather tight rope on everything that happened in his company.

Ellie's mother poked her head into the great room momentarily with a snip for Ellie to hurry up and make herself presentable. As though Ellie were not already. But Ellie smoothed her skirts again, pointlessly, for the second time that morning and made sure she looked calm before standing and joining Mother in the hall.

Just as she stopped behind her mother at the front door, the two of her younger siblings came down the stairs in something sounding quite akin to cows attempting to trample the staircase into the ground. Ellie made a mental note to scold them out of their mother's hearing, but really there was nothing for it. They two were more excitable than a bird in a small cage when anything at all out of the ordinary happened. They crowded in behind her eagerly, forcing her to push an elbow into ribs for threat that they would make her crush Mother against the door. She remained very calm.

The sharp rap at the door struck Ellie as strangely hollow.

Mother made a slow count of five and Ellie made her sisters take the same number of steps back. It would not do to crowd Mr. Charles in the doorway, but being politely curious was best.

He was a handsome man for one in his late fifties, though stiff as a board with formality, as all those of his stature often were. He had in the crook of one arm a silk top hat with a dark red silk strip, and in the chest pocket of his fine black coat was a kerchief the same color. He was a man with a hard face, with a gleam in his eye saying he was more than accustomed to getting his way. He was kindly though as well, as Ellie knew from experience. He treated Father well that she had seen on her several outings to the firm, and Father never had anything bad to say of his employer.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Charles," Mother said breathily upon swinging the door wide, "Such a surprise to see you. Please do come in."

She stepped out of the way for Mr. Charles to enter and Ellie pushed her sisters through the door to the great room so the newcomers could pass into the dining room unhindered. Mr. Charles looked grimmer than the last time she'd seen him, and gave no smile to them as he passed.

"Oh, heaven's sake, Ellie get out of the way!" Amelia spat at her, "They've gone!" She was the second youngest sister and rather too bad tempered for one so pretty.

"I think we should wait and let Mother speak to him alone," Ellie replied. She kept her eyes on the dining room doorway, "Mr. Charles did not look at all pleased to be here."

"I do not care a bit for Mr. Charles, but did you see the face on that man who came with him?" Amelia said, letting her voice drop to a whisper. She might as well have squealed for how excited she sounded.

Ellie turned around to look at the younger woman. She was only fifteen, and thinking about men already! She used it as an excuse to glare at her, for Ellie had not truly seen the other gentleman accompanying Mr. Charles. Indeed she only just remember he had not been alone.

Else giggled like the child she was, at thirteen, "Really, Ellie. You're going to be an old maid like Aunt Berlin. You are beautiful, but you are so distracted all the time the gentlemen tire of keeping you entertained!" she giggled again and Ellie signed, turning back to watch the dining room doorway. She could hear the sound of talking, but with all the whispers from her siblings, she could not make out what was being said.

"I do wonder though," Else said suddenly, "Why is Mr. Charles here when Father is not? Mr. Charles would never visit unless Father was about. Not unless it was very important indeed."

"That," Ellie said, "Is my question precisely."

Chapter Two:
The conversation was a long one. The three sisters had gone to listen at the door, but upon their mother's discovering them whispering just out of sight, she scolded them harshly and slammed the door in their faces. Whatever news Mr. Charles bore had put Mother in a state Ellie had not witnessed in her in a long while. She could not remember her mother ever shedding tears openly, or losing her composure in front of guests.

Amelia and Else quickly lost interest in waiting, migrating back up the stairs to continue whatever of their frivolous activities had been interrupted. Ellie was too nervous to relax, personally. She wanted very badly to know what was going on and did not particularly like being excluded.

It was not until well after dark that Mr. Charles departed with his companion. Mother did not show them out, and Mr. Charles looked graver leaving than when he'd come. Ellie poked her head from the great room and watched as the other man closed the door behind him, then ran up the hall to poke in at the dining room.

Mother sat at the table alone. She was very still, and staring upward at nothing. The glass of water in front of her sat on the table untouched. There was a limp, deflated air about her that Ellie had never seen before.

"Mother?" Ellie spoke the word quietly, "Is everything all right?"

Mother did not answer for a long while, and Ellie feared to ask the question again.

"Bring your sisters here and all of you sit down," Mother said after a very long few minutes. Ellie nodded and darted into the hall and up the stairs. She ushered the younger girls down while threatening to box their ears if they made any kind of silly remark at all, for something very serious had happened and Mother was not herself.

When they were all seated at the table the girls squirmed, but held their peace. Mother was in no hurry to speak, and as moments passed, the others were less and less inclined for it to be otherwise.

"Your father," Mother said suddenly after a shuddering intake of breath, "will....will not be coming home."

"Why not?" Amelia asked immediately, "I thought he said the merger would go well."

"How much longer do they intend to keep him there?" Ellie asked right after. Having a prolonged stay away from the firm did not happen often, but was not unheard of. However, this merger was supposed to be something routine. It had been in the works for something going to two years. Surely it could not be as bad as Mother was making it look.

Mother shook her head, "N-no. He will not be home at all. He....he has met with an accident..."

The dining room was suddenly very quiet. Ellie felt her hands go to her stomach involuntarily and the tension was palpable in the blink of an eye.

"He...your father, he..." there was a long pause, then the rest of the sentence came out in a sobbing whisper, "h-he has died."

The world went black. All light died for a moment, leaving an emptiness in Ellie's heart that could not be filled. For a moment she could see nothing and could feel only the strange sensation of the earth moving quickly under her as if it were about to fall away.

When the room came back to her, it seemed she looked at it through a veil. There was pain on her sisters' faces and they clutched at each other for support, her mother was weeping and suddenly broken. She could hear what she thought must be screams of despair, but they sounded distant...on the other side of the universe. The wailing seemed to go on forever. There was a sudden pain in her chest and she realized she was sobbing. The screaming came from her own lungs.

Chapter Three

Father had completed the merger with more success than Mr. Charles could have hoped. So Ellie had heard tell. But she paid little attention to news coming to their house since Mother had taken to bed after Mr. Charles' visit.

Upon completion of the merger, Mr. Charles had said, Father was in a rush to return home, to see his family again and tend his household properly. He had boarded his coach early in the morning, before the sun was up and urged the driver to push for the greatest speed possible. The driver had.

The morning was still dark, said Mr. Charles, when the coach took a sharp turn too wide and toppled into a ravine that the road bordered for a time. The coach had smashed against the rocks below, killing the horses, the driver, and Father.

Mother told Ellie and her sisters this the very night Mr. Charles visited their home, just before she went into her room and refused to come out again. Amelia and Else had retreated to the room they shared as well, and as Ellie stood in the entry hall staring at the space in front of her eyes, she could hear them sobbing into their pillows.

A vice was clamped around her heart, creating a pain such as Ellie had never felt before. Father was gone. Forever. He would never again walk through the front door with little souvenirs for his daughters from the villages on the other side of the country. He would never again laugh his deep, rich laugh at the dinner table when Amelia told one of her childish jokes. He would never again sit in his favorite chair in front of the fireplace and read to them from one of the many books in his collection. Ellie would never fix his tie for him, gather up is cloak and hat for him, serve him dinner in his study when he brought his work home with him, discuss the next book he should buy the next time he was in the city, or laugh with her sisters when he thought to pull Mother up from her embroidery and dance with her while she protested.

Never again.

It crushed her. She sank against the wall in the hallway clenching her skirts in her hands and cried into them. The world could not be right again. Not with Father gone.

She only barely registered when Rose, one of their maids, came cautiously into the hall and bent to gently wrap an arm around her waist. She pulled Ellie to her feet and guided her to her bedroom, the only one on the first floor. Ellie paid no attention as Rose got her out of her dress and into a nightgown, tucking her into bed while she shook uncontrollably with grief.

She did not remember when sleep came. She cried when she woke, then slept again. Nothing mattered in the whole world now.