Chapter one: Unwanted Memories

Chapter one: The unwanted memories

Vansendt groaned as he rolled out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. He quickly relieved himself then carried himself to the sink. After washing his hands he looked up at his unshaved face in the mirror. He laughed aloud as he realized with his brown hair falling into his eyes and his facial hair starting to fill in, he was beginning to look like a hobo. So he quickly shaved and gave a little shape to the few hairs on his chin that he was keeping. After that he made his way back into his room, where he took a look at his alarm clock. 3:36 a.m..

“Damnit,” he said to himself “I woke up to early again.”

For the past month, good sleep was hard to get for Vansendt. He would lie awake until two or three in the morning and always awake around five or five-thirty. This was because he would fall asleep and wake up with unwanted thoughts and memories. Thoughts and memories of his life when he was most happy, the parts of his life when they were still alive.
They were his closest and best friends. There were five of them. Two of them where best friends since 2nd grade, Brad and Greg. Every year after they meet they were on the same soccer team and almost had the same classes until the end of high school. They were closer then blood brothers. The next two friends were the two girls which Brad and Greg fell in love with in high school, Beth and Renee. Even thought. Vansendt met them at the end of high school; they became good friends in college where they helped each other out through the years. Then there was the last one. The one which Vansendt held the closest to his heart. A girl he knew as long as he could remember. A girl who was his first friend, first crush, and the girl who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, Isabel. But they were gone now. Eight months ago, they all died in a plane crash on their way to the mountain for a trip. All of them, were now only a seed of Vansendt’s memories
Vansendt shook his head to get them off his mind as he threw on some clothes on for work. Thinking about them this early in the morning only meant that he would be thinking about them all day. For the past month, it has been like this. Words, things, and actions would trigger thoughts and memories. But he was starting to get used to it. After getting dressed in Black t-shirt and some jeans, he walked to the living room and flipped on the TV. Then he sat on his couch as he used the remote to surf through the channels. He finally stopped at the local news channel. He watched as slim blue-eyed blonde went over the main stories over the past week.

“On Friday,” she said “there was a large fire at Lexington Park. The fire destroyed five acres before our local fire department could put it out. Luckily no people or animal was harmed by the fire.”

Once the words “Lexington Park” reached Vansendt’s ears, he felt the trigger of a memory being pulled. He closed his eyes and the world around him, faded away. The sounds of the T.V. were replaced by the sounds of the trees being raddled by the night breezes and the night life of Lexington Park. When Vansendt opened his eyes, he was sitting in the driver seat of a 1994 red, convertible, mustang. The seat was leaned back and he was gazing up at the stars. He rolled his head to the left and realized that we was in the parking lot of Lexington Park then he rolled his head to the right where he saw a woman sitting the passenger’s seat. He studied her really quickly. She was a lovely redhead with a body of anangel. Just feeling her present made Vansendt’s heart race. She was also laying back in her seat gazing at the stars. She noticed that Vansendt’s was looking at her. She turned her head towards him so that their eyes met. She flashed a smile then returned her eyes back to the summer night sky. Vansendt did the same.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” She said with her lovely voice.

Vansendt smiled as some cheesy lines entered his head but he ignored them then replied “Yeah, the stars are amazing.”

The woman smiled again as she reached for Vansendt hand. Once they were holding hands, Vansendt took this opportunity to pull her closer so that she was in his arms. As he held her, he whispered into her ear.

“Isabel, when I am with you, everything is beautiful. The stars, the sky, everything!” He positioned himself so that his eyes starred into her beautiful blue eyes “Now that I have you here in my arms, in my life. I never want to let you go. I never want to return to life without you. “

Isabel’s eyes were filled with love, but before she could reply Vansendt let out a laugh and his memory was crushed by reality and he returned to sitting on his couch in his TV. He frowned as he hit the power bottom on the remote, the TV flickered off leaving Vansendt to stare at the blank screen.

“Damn it!” He yelled as he threw the remote against wall making the battery launch from the remote. “Damn it,” He repeated as tears began to slowly roll down his check “It’s too early for these thoughts, these damn memories”

There was a silence for a good ten minutes as Vansendt tired to Empty his raid his mind of her face, her smile. The beauty which was unforgettable. Afterwards, he stood up and walked back into his room where he quickly grabbed his work clothes and MP3 player then headed out of his apartment. As he walked through the apartment complex toward the exit, he search through his Mp3 player. The small thing carried about 1000 songs, even thought Vansendt only kept around 120 on it. He had many different and random bands and artists on it such as Chronic future and Living Legends.
Vansendt stepped out of the apartment and the cool morning air of the new work summer wrapped around his body. He quickly set his MP3 player to “Apology” by Chronic Future and began running. Unlike the rest of the day. Running was one of the only things that allowed him to clear his mind…this is if it was a normal day, but today, Vansendt couldn’t get them off his mind.
The “path” that Vansendt ran every morning started at the entrance of the apartment complex to and through the park, pass the library and then back to the apartment complex . In the end the run takes about 15-20 minutes depending on how Vansendt was feeling. Today, he was somewhat tired. So as he reached the park he quickly found a bench to rest on.
“Man, I am so tired” he said to himself as he sat down. On the bench he looked around, knowing the layout of the park very well, he knew that he was in the upper right corner of the squared park. It was Vansendt’s favorite part of the park, due to the fact that it had the lease memories. This park was mostly filled with families with little ones and people with dogs. It was usually full with the sounds of children playing on the playground and dogs barking as they ran around in a small field but due last night’s fire most of it was tapped off and park workers were working on rebuilding the burnt playground.
Vansendt smiled as he felt that the he had the energy to return to running. This energy was mostly from the fact that they were out of his thoughts and he was repeating the lyrics to “Blessed by a Nightmare” by Autopilot Off in his head. But as he stood up he slipped into a memory.
Darkness wrapped around Vansendt’s body as he stood in the park. The burnt field and playground returned to what they once were. Vansendt was unaware of the time but he guessed it to be around midnight. He stood there beside the bench holding a glock 17 in each hand. There was a blood stain in his black shirt from a bullet wound and the blood started to drip down to his baggie dark blue jeans. Vansendt’s eyes searched the surrounding area for a reason why he stood here. But found nothing until a figure appear as if out of know where. The figure was wearing a hoodie with the hood up and black jeans. Due to the poor lighting in the park at night, Vansendt couldn’t see all of his face but a grin.

“Hello, Vansendt,” the figure said with a voice of a man. “How is that girl of yours?”

“Damn It, Abaddon!” Vansendt raised both guns at the figure.

The figures grin changed into a smile. “Do it, Vansendt! Shoot me!”
Vansendt’s arms begin to shake.

“What’s wrong? Can’t you do it?” Abaddon began laughing. “Can’t you get revenge for what I have done to your lover? Can’t you take revenge on the man who put her in a coma?”

“Shut up!” Vansendt strengthen his arms to stop his arms from shaking.

“Then shoot me! Kill me but before you do. Show those eyes! Those eyes which only a man without a soul could have, those eyes which can kill without thought or hesitation! Those eyes which God could never forgive! Kill me VANSENDT! “

A rage overcame Vansendt and he felt himself squeeze on the triggers and as the recoil of the two guns effected Vansendt, he was kicked back into reality. The playground returned to the burnt ruins and the small field faded into the scorched earth it was. Vansendt returned to wearing his running clothes and was standing in front of the bench. He sat down in confusion. This “memory” he just had was like the other ones and it was the first time he had it. The man Abaddon wasn’t someone he remembered and doesn’t recall his lover ever being in a coma. Maybe this was a vision of the future or even maybe a memory of someone else. Vansendt shock his head to forget the confusion. Then decided not to finish the run and waked home.

Back at his apartment, Vansendt quickly took a shower and got really for work. He worked at a local deli and coffee shop named ‘The Black Olive.’ The owners of the deli were two sisters who were crazy about eating health and after creating a few healthy meals for friends, they came up with a crazy idea of opening a deli and The ‘The Black Olive’ was the product of that idea. The deli was located just outside of town in a small building which was used as donut shop beforehand.
A bell rung as Vansendt walked through the door of the deli.

“Hello, Vansendt.” A woman said as she stood behind the counter.

“Good Morning, Tammi.” Vansendt replied. The woman, Tammi, was the younger of the two sisters. The young blonde, who usually dyed her hair brown or black, was the crazy fun one of the two sisters. Her and her husband usually hosted parties at least once a month. So she was the more popular of the two sisters. The older sister, Traci, was calmer and somewhat wiser, unless you get her drunk than she became a crazy mad woman. But the chances of her getting drunk were very rare. When she wasn’t working she was at home, gardening.
Beside Vansendt and the two owners, there were three other workers: Charles, Tabatha, and Melissa. Charles was Traci’s older son. He was a lazy 21 year old, who dropped out of college and moved in with Traci and her husband. Tabatha was Charles’s girlfriend, who he met in high school and the last employee, Melissa, was a somewhat shy girl. With her blond her, transparent blue eyes and the innocent look of her face, she seemed uncorrupted by the evil of the world. She also had a huge crush on Vansendt but he was too blind to see it.
Of the five other workers, Vansendt knew Charles the best. When he started seven months ago, they began to goof off together and where friends ever since. But unfortunately , he wasn’t working today and he was stuck with Tammi, Traci and Melissa.
Vansendt checked his watch as Traci and Melissa walked into the deli. 10:50. Ten minutes until they open.

“Good morning” Traci said to both Vansendt and Tammi.

“Oh, hey guys.” Tammi said in a cheerful voice. “You ready for a fun day?”

“Yup” Traci said, joining Tammi behind the counter. “Charles said that we couldn’t make that much money without him here. So we have a goal for today.”.

Tammi laughed “That boy is so full of himself. What is he up today anyways?”

Traci grabbed some meat and got ready to open “He and Tabatha plan to spend the whole day together shopping, going for dinner and then a movie.”

“Those two are so cute together" Tammi said as she walked over to the door and turned the “closed” sign to “open”

Vansendt laughed “Charles would beat you up if he heard you calling him cute.”

Everyone laughed and for a moment he felt as if he could move on as if he could reture to true happiness.
The bell rang as a family walked into the deli. The family was made up of two parents who appeared in their late twenties and a young daughter who are the age of seven.

“Good morning” Melissa greeting them “How may I help you?”

“Good morning.” The Father replied “um… I would like a BLT club.”

“One BLT club” Melissa repeat to Vansendt. He nodded and prepared the sandwiches. The mother stepped up to the counter.

“I would like meatball sandwich with extra cheese.”

“I got this one.” Tammi joined Vansendt in making sandwiches.

“Okay, ma’am.” Melissa said as she put the price into the cash register. “And for the little girl?”

The mother looked down at the daughter “What would you like, Isabel?”

As the name reached Vansendt’s ears, the crew watched as happiness drained from Vansendt’s face. Vansendt stopped what was doing and the memories flood in.

“Hey, Vansendt. There are some boxes in the back that need to be moved, could you do that for us? I’ll take over the sandwiches. “ Traci said

Vansendt nodded sadly and walked toward the back room.
The Three girls finished the orders and the family when on their way.

“Did you see how fast the smile left his face?” Traci said as the girls sat at the table waiting for more people to come in.

“Yeah,” Tammi replied “What should we do about it?”

“I don’t know. If we let him like this any longer he is going to drive himself crazy.”

“But what do we do?” Melissa asked

There was a silence for awhile

“The only thing I can think is to send him home.” Traci suggested

Tammi frowned “Who is going to tell him?”

Traci looked at Melissa. “You can do it”

Melissa looked surprised “Why me?”

Traci smiled “We see the look you give him.”

“Plus you are good at cheering up people.” Tammi added

“No, I don’t think it would work.” Melissa said doubting herself.

Tammi stood up “Okay, I got it then.”

She headed into the back room. The back room was a fairly room. Half of the room was refrigerator space for the sandwiches’ meat and drinks and the rest was shelves full of things such as chips, bread and other things.
Tammi found Vansendt sitting in the corner with his back against the wall and his legs straighten out. He had a blank look on his face and his eyes were staring off into space.

“Vansendt,” Tammi said

Vansendt shock his head to returned to reality then turned his head to Tammi
“Oh, sorry.” He attempted to get on his feet but Tammi pushed him back down.

“It’s okay, sit.” She looked Vansendt in the eyes. “Okay, look now. You’ve got us all worried. The way you just are. I mean. I know you lost someone but please get over it. For you can’t live the rest of your life in the past. “

Vansendt frowned “Sorry, I just that I can’t get them out of my head. “

“Well, you look terrible; go home at get some sleep. The girls and I got it today. Okay?”

Vansendt nodded as he stood up. “Thank you, Tammi.”

“Anything for a good worker of the Black Olive” She smiled.

Both of them headed back into the front of the deli.
****
Vansendt found himself in a labyrinth of dead bodies as he stood in what he believe to a battle ground of some war. Once again he had a glock in each head. He began to look around for any live bodies but failed. Or that’s what he thought.

“Vansendt, no no…what do they call you now? Exul.” A familiar voice said.

Vansendt quickly turned around to see a man standing on top of a pile of bodies. It was Abaddon. This time the hoddie was off, revealing a sleeveless shirt. Covering his arms were tattoos of words written and Latin and Hebrew.

“Abaddon! This was your doing?” Vansendt said.

“Yes, wonderful isn’t!? “he laughed. “This world, this reality will fall into the depth of the abyss.“

“This is insanity, Abaddon. Which make you believe that you have the right to sentence this world to hell?”

Abaddon laughed once again. “This is because I am the destroyer. And the sins of the world have become too heavy to be forgiven by God. “ he raised a pistol at Vansendt. “Now, Exul, be forgotten.”

He laughed for the finally time and pulled the trigger and sent Vansendt to a painfully death.
****
Vansendt awoke with cold sweat on his body. He now laid on the couch in his apartment again. It was just a dream. After being sent home for work he decided to attempt to take a nap.

“Finally, I got some sleep,” He said as he looked at the clock. 8:56. He got home around noon so in the end he got almost nine hours but he still felt tired. After the excitement of getting sleep left Vansendt, the thoughts returned.

“Damnit” He said to himself as pictures of his friends entered his mind. “This pain is endless, isn’t?”

He stood up and carried his tired body into the kitchen where he got himself a handful of oxycodone and swallowed all of them and drank a glass of water. He waited awhile for the effects to kick in but nothing happened. He cursed then carried his tired body through his apartment door and found his way to the stairs and head towards the roof. The apartment building was a three floored building, Vansendt lived on the second. It took him about ten minutes to reach the top in the start which he was in. The roof was like most of the other buildings, flat, and someone attempted to turn the roof into a patio. Vansendt wondered toward the edge and looked over the side. On the ground was a few parked cars and one or two passing people. But it didn’t matter to Vansendt.

“As long as it takes the pain away” He said as he stood onto the ledge. “Here I come Isabel.” And with that he took a step toward his death.