City Parking

I’ve been living in Washington, DC for a while now but there are many things that I still find odd even after all these years, like parking.  I didn’t grow up in this area, and slightly off topic here, I’ve only met about nine people who truly did grow up in DC, that makes it less than one person per year so far.  I grew up in a small town in Pennsylvania where everyone had a car but with good reason, everything was a few miles away.  Here, everything is in walking distance but people still feel the need to drive so they can park even farther away.

I just recently became the proud owner of a car, an old beater with a transmission problem and a few dings on the bumper thanks to an icy road and a badly placed telephone pole.  We have an off-street, garage-parking place so while we find the parallel parking game amusing, we’re thankful not to have to partake.  But for those who do, I ask, who taught you how to park?  While I will never profess to be a parallel parking pro, I am capable of maneuvering my car in to a spot on occasion.  Here’s my question, why continue to back up till you hit the car parked directly behind you instead of using your mirrors to help gauge just how far away the parked car is from your bumper?  I don’t understand.  Maybe I need to start parking on the street more often to understand this phenomenon better.

Our neighborhood is a rather difficult place to park, which however, does not stop anyone from driving up and down our street continuously looking for an open spot.  As I was strolling home from the bookstore on a recent evening, I had the opportunity to witness a spectacular parking escapade.  A woman in a minivan, on the phone of course, yelling at her child who had somehow removed himself from his car seat and was proudly standing, attempting to back into a space way too small for her minivan.  I stopped to watch.

First, she backed up at a sharp angle and hit the curb.  Pulling up, she took a second try that kept her a good two feet from the curb and a bit too intimate with the bumper behind her.  On her third try, she got closer to the curb and even closer to the car behind her, which I would bet, now had at least some paint scratched off its bumper.  She pulled up and tapped the bumper in front, threw into reverse and proceeded to once again hit the car behind her.  She continued to pull up and back until she moved both cars just far enough to get her car in.  I wondered how she would get out but then decided that I didn't want to witness that nightmare.  I was very happy to know that my car was safe in a garage where she wouldn't be able to get near it.

A few days later out shopping, I safely and carefully parked on a side street.  After making my purchase I walked back down the street to see my front bumper being mauled by someone trying to fit their over sized SUV into a space left by a much smaller car.  I stood in shock.  Should I approach and help, act like a Good Samaritan to save my bumper from further abuse or just let it happen?  I was frozen in my spot and before I knew it, the SUV driver seemed to be satisfied with the park job, got out and walked away.  I approached to survey the damage to find the bumper in the same sad state. I got in my car and went home to safely park in my garage silently promising my car and its bumper it would not happen again.  I think the car knew I was lying.