The Ultimate Shocker

The Ultimate Shocker



         "I'm gay." he spoke after long thought.
         "What? How can you be gay?" the other figure sitting close by said.
He looked over at his best friend, Heather, yet Heather was a guy. Finally, after the look on his face was plain and simple he spoke up again.
         "Yes. I am officially gay."
         "I don't understand. How?"
He smiled a wry smile. "Cause I had sex with a man. He was, what's the word, quite appeasing." The figure licked his lips seductively.
         "I'm think I'm going to be sick." spoke Heather. He was quite taken aback.
         "I knew you might not have wanted to hear this, but, you being my best friend in all, I thought you should know."
         "That your gay? Are you out of your mind? How could you do something with a guy?"
         "Well, it's all quite funny really. I was sitting at a table in Taco Bell the other day and this guy walked in. He was outstandingly gorgeous and I was attracted to him in a way I have never been drawn to someone before in my life." He paused, his eyes drifting up behind his eyelids remembering back on the feeling. "Well, he was in line waiting. He looked around almost nonchalantly and his eyes glazed over mine starring at him. His face quickly shot back to mine as if doing a double take. He starred at me and I starred back. Those eyes...ooo...I can't explain. So--so green. He smiled at me and then the lady at the counter called to him and he ordered. He waited for his food at the counter, all the while looking back at me. I could hardly eat, the process of sticking something in my mouth just so--unnatural. Anyways, he finally got his food and walked slowly around the railing acting as if he didn't know where to sit. His eyes caught mine and almost seemed to ask if there was anyone sitting with me. I answered back no, that this spot was free, motioning with my hand. He sat down. My heart was beating so fast."
         "I can only imagine." spoke Heather sarcastically, quite frankly hating this conversation and where it was leading.
         "Well, we talked and I found out his name was Tonie. I told him mine was Ben and we just sort of hit it off. After for like a few hours of sitting and having all kinds of discussions about what we liked and what we thought of the world he gave me his number and said that if I ever wanted to get together and do something just to give him a call."
Ben hesitated to speak the next lines.
         "Right before he left he spoke two words to me. He motioned for me to lean a little closer to him and I did. ' I'm gay. ' he had said. The words stung me in a thousand pieces. Gay. I wanted him to leave me right away, but, part of me wanted him to stay. He left and before exiting the building turned around and smiled."
He stopped on his recollections and let the words sink in. His body was sweating from the excitement. He could hardly contain himself.
         "So, let me get this straight. You met a guy at Taco Bell, he was gay and you two sort of just hit it off?"
He could hardly contain his joy. "Yes! That's correctly right."
Heather could hardly contain himself. "You're absolutely sick! You're messed up. What is your problem?"
         "Nothing. I just--"
         "You just what? You just like a fucking guy, is that it?"
         "Yeah."
         "Exactly. Your fucked up. You need some counseling." Heather exhaled a sigh of disgust.
         "Well, I did that already. Like I said, I wasn't gay then, or liked him. I hated the idea of a gay guy liking me and giving me his number. It was absolutely crazy. So, like you said just now, I did go to get some counseling. This is where the really crazy part comes in. My psychiatrist agreed with me for having these strange feelings for a man. She said I should not hinder them, but rather, to embrace them like a blessing from heaven. She said to try it out and see how it goes. I had showed her the napkin that had the guy's number on it and she smiled and said I should give him a call. 'What could it hurt?' she had said. 'Might as well give it a try and see how it is. What could it hurt? All you have to gain is to really know how your feelings are.' I was shocked at first by her words, but soon, later on, realized that she was right. Why should I reject my feelings? So, I called him."
         "Stop. Stop. Let me get this straight. She told you to call him?
         "Yes."
         "And to get with him?"
         "Yes. To see how it was."
         "Who was your psychiatrist?"
         "Emily Dawson"
         "Emily Dawson? You went to Emily Dawson? No wonder you are so screwed up then. Emily Dawson is a quack. She has absolutely no idea what she is doing and secondly, let alone know whether or not being gay and straight is. She had no right to tell you to go out and be openly gay, or rather, to accept the fact if you were. You are not gay. And you never were. People get these feelings at least once in their life time. It means nothing."
         "Well...I am gay though."
         "No your not! I refuse to believe that. I'm going to make a call to my attorney. This Emily Dawson character needs to get some talking to. She can't go around telling people they're gay, so go out amongst the world and sin no more. What does she think she is, God? pshh..I'll deal with this Ben. Don't worry."
They sat there for a few uncomfortable seconds. Then Ben gradually ended the awkward silence.
         "Ummm....You don't need to do that?"
         "And why is that?"
         "Because Emily Dawson," he hesitated with his next words, "because Emily Dawson is Tonie."
The words hit a crevice in Heather's stone wall of hope. The shock was almost unbearable for him.
         "What?!"
         "Yep. I didn't know that either until I got there and it was her, or rather, him."
         "But...but...How can that be?"
         "I asked myself the same question."
The odd silence returned. Heather could hardly believe what he was hearing. Emily was Tonie. How was that possible?
         "I still don't understand. How could Tonie be Emily at the same time?"
         "At first I thought the same question but then it hit me, he had changed his name for his profession and had his real name for whenever he was out in the world. It kept his business life out of his personal life."
         "I see."
         "And secondly, Tonie isn't just gay. He's bisexual."
That the was the last straw. Heather couldn't take it anymore.
         "He's what! Tell me your joking. Please, tell me your joking."
         "I'm not. He is."
Heather shook his head from side to side, completely aghast with the way this conversation had turned out.
         "I don't quite understand one thing from this whole story..."
         "Yes."
         "How does all this make you gay?"
         "Well, you see after I went to see my psychiatrist, finding out it was really Tonie, he asked me to come over to his place afterward, and well, things started to get a little steamy and then---"
         "Stop! Stop. I don't want to know. This conversation has gotten out of hand."
Heather got up shakingly picked up the trays of trash and made his way to the trash disposal bin. Some stray pieces of trash floated down to the ground, missing the opening mouth where the trash is inserted.
Heather cursed to himself, "Damn it!" He looked up to Ben watching him with a faint smile on his face.
         "Stop your smiling. Let's go. We're done here."
Ben got up and followed Heather out to the car. They both got in.
         "Don't tell me ever again that your gay. You understand?"
         "But..."
         "Do you understand?"
         "Yes...but.."
         "Alright. Now that we got this clear, you are not to tell anyone else what you just told me in there. Understood?"
         "ahh."
         "Understood!"
         "Ok. I won't tell anyone."
         "Good. I'm taking you home and tomorrow I'm taking you to see a real psychiatrist. One that isn't gay before hand."
There was a deafening silence about the car. The only sound was that of the radio gently rumming and that of the engine grinding. Ben was wiggling uncomfortably in his seat.
         "What is it? What's the matter with you?"
         "I...ummm...I sort of already told someone else."
         "What! Who?"
The name he spoke next was more terrifying than the realization that Ben was gay. Heather couldn't believe his ears. It couldn't be true. It couldn't.
         "God...please...please don't let it be true."
But it was. And he knew it. He pushed on the gas more and they accelerated off into the darkening road, the blackness of the night caressing the body of the car, shielding the vision of what was taking place inside, hiding the secret. Heather finally got home later that night. The blood was still on his collar and his pants. He quickly took them off and put them in a bag. He went to the shower and turned the water on. The night had been a busy one. He looked at the tired and disheveled image of a young but weary man looking back at him. There was some scarlet drips splattered on his cheeks and he quickly washed them off, scrubbing, as if it was a leech that would infect his body. Later after sitting in the shower for a long time he got out, got dressed and went underneath the covers. Their cool touch soothed Heather and he relaxed. Not five minutes went by when he was yanked out of his soft dream with the screaming of his telephone.
         "Hello?" he looked at his clock. It was now 2:30.
         "Hello. Mr. Smith?"
         "Yes."
         "Heather Smith?"
         "Yes. Who is this? You know what time it is?"
It seemed the figure on the other end of the phone shifted nervously.
         "Officer Smith. I was wondering if I could ask you some questions?"
         "About what?"
         "About where you were at approximately 10:30 at tonight."
A knot lodged itself in Heather's throat. "I...I was here. At my apartment."
Some scribbling on the other end of the line as of someone taking notes.
         "Uh huh. I see. And what were you doing at your apartment?"
         "Watching a movie."
More notes.
         "You are friends with Ben Riley, are you not?"
Heather hesitated. "Yes. Yes I am. We've known each other for a long time. Since we were kids."
         "I see. You wouldn't happen to know where he is would you?"
         "No."
         "Not a clue?"
         "No."
         "Ok. When was the last time you saw him?"
         "Umm...10."
         "10?"
         "Yes."
         "What were you two doing at 10?"
         "We were getting something to eat."
         "Who was driving?"
         "I was."
         "Did you take him home then?"
         "Yes."
         "About what time do you think that was?"
         "About 10:45," he lied.
         "10:45. Ok. Are you sure?"
         "Yep." He was beginning to get a little too nervous with all these questions the policemen was asking him. The phone shook in his hands and it was all that he could do to keep it from sliding out of his hands from the sweat that now cascaded down his palms.
         "And you left right after dropping him off, correct?"
         "Yes."
         "The mom says that she never remembered him coming in that night. Do you know where he might have gone?"
         "I have no idea."
         "Are you sure? Are you positive?"
         "Yes." He was beginning to get frustrated with these pointless questions. Of course he knew where he was. He put him there.
         "Were you close with Mr. Riley?"
The policemen could hear the short rasping breaths on the other end.
         "Is he ok?"
         "I'm sorry to say this, but Mr. Riley is dead."
The phone went still. The breath caught in his lungs. How could they have found him already? That was impossible. He had been so meticulous with his work. He had been so precise. He had been sure no one had seen him.
         "Are you sure?" he finally managed.
         "Yes. His body was found by a neighbor who lived close by. He had left his dog out to roam around and it was then that the dog came across the dead body. We got the call not more to two hours ago. I'm sorry, your friend has been dead for more than four hours."
Tears were streaming down his face. He just couldn't believe it. He had been in a trance at first when he first took him there, completely upset with his saying he was gay and all. He had reacted on impulse, on emotion. He had regretted doing what he did, but, he couldn't help it.
         "Are you alright Mr. Smith?"
Heather tried to get a hold of himself. "Yes. Yes I'm fine." The policemen could hear some sniffling.
         "There is one last thing, Mr. Smith."
         "Yes."
         "We would like you to come in tomorrow for some questioning. Would that be a problem?"
         "No. What time?"
The policemen said something to someone else nearby then answered, "How about now?" Just as he said those words there came a knocking on the front door. Heather jumped from the sudden noise. Who was at his house at this hour of the night?
He went to the door. "Who is it?"
         "Deputy Collin and Deputy Henley. May we come in sir?"
         "One second."
His blood chilled over like ice. They were here. What would he do? He had killed Ben, but only to save him from the agonies of being gay. How would he explain this to the cops? He couldn't let them come in.
         "Just a second."
He went quickly to the window and unlatched it. He looked one last time back at the door and was gone, his shadow mixing with the darkness, disappearing into the night.