Reflection of Being

I’m the girl, who’s invisible but always seen,
Who is loud and prude and bitchy and keen.

I speak my mind without thinking and hold back with remorse,
But can be quiet and calm, sitting still with no force.

I’m not that innocent, but I never go too far.
I’m still daddy’s little girl, just with experience and many scars.

My guard is hung high as I wear my heart on my sleeve,
With my self confidence always on low and high hopes that are hard to believe.

Simple things make me happy, but I have a complicated personality and soul.
I get lost, but wake up to complete my life’s ultimate goal.

I’m easily persuaded with confusion and misunderstood,
With intentions that seem outrageous but always meant for good.

I’m gullible for heartache and I fight for love,
But I fall blindly, always getting hurt by following my emotions instead of listening to reality above.

I always observe my surroundings knowing what’s real and true,
Instead of being brainless and not having any clue.

I put others before me by giving them advice from life experiences and letting them know I care
Making sure they’re not alone handling trials of misfortune they don’t deserve that’s grievingly unfair.

When it comes to my appearance I think I’m the ugliest duckling of them all.
Disgusting with each inch of epidermis, body part, and function as I’m always bitterly appalled.

Stress and over-analyzing is the nightmare to each and every one of my dreams
As depression takes over, making me feel: empty, argumentative, moody, with an unhappy persona, always irritated and fake smiles with no angelic gleam.

Struggling comes about when I need to forget, forgive the past, and let go,
Since I don’t want time to stop, as reality moves on and loosing a chance at a future I may never have or know.

Letting people in and to trust is the hardest thing for me to do,
Since I’m always getting stabbed in the back, never knowing who’s trusting enough to go to.

I’m unique in every way with each and every flaw,
I go straight for what I’m seeking with no regrets, and breaking morals and laws.

When I look in the mirror I see a reflection of a girl who’s insane as can be,
And I can proudly say that reflection belongs to no one other than me.