my insecurities..

I wish I was not me.. I mean who in the right mind would want to be?
I wish I was Mia, I mean Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldo..Yeah, she might be flat-chested and flunking algebra, still she's a princess and plus she lives in NEW YORK! I know she's only a fictional character and only exists in my imagination.. But how I wish I was a fictional character.. That I only exist in your imagination.. People often told me that if i would be much like my cousins I will be somewhat attractive.. But, hello? my cousins have the most perfect skin, they have the gentle eyes and not to mention that besides from being pretty they also have exceptional mental abilities.. And people would just judge me from comparing me to my cousins, as if I am not even half of the par of excellency they possess???
but...
they never.. in the slightest, tinniest moment ever thought that it is not my fault??
IS IT MY FAULT that my thighs are fat?
is it my fault that i have a flat nose?
is it my fault that i have to wear braces?
is it my fault that i am not tall enough?
not pretty enough?
not "fit" enough?
IS IT MY FAULT????
i wish i was contented..
how i wish this would end..
how i wish someone would help..
someone would listen...
would come and take me away..
BUT..
yeah..
nobody in the world cares..
pity to me..
whatever..
ugh..
hmpf..