The Meaning of Family

The Meaning of Family
What does a family mean to you?
Is it the warmth of a home to return to after a hard day at work?
Or is it a place where fond memories are created to be forever cherished?
To me a family should provide comfort and support
To pick you up when life throws its hardest punches at you
To never judge or hurt you and to show you that there are people who love you
Consistently
Irrevocably
Forever
A family is not something you choose
It is what you are given by the hand of fate
But it is also what you must stick with throughout your life
No matter how much strife or resentment is holstered in the home
It is always a place of peace and familiarity that warms the smallest cockles of your heart
It is the one place where you should feel happy to be yourself
Where you are not afraid of saying what you think or feel
It is the one place that all people need most in their lives
And if that is the case where is mine?
I have a home as do all persons
But mine is not a warm place to be cherished and filled with joy
The ghosts of my past echo within their faces, their laughs, their smiles
It is not a place for me to retreat to when I am sad
It is the place that throws the hardest punches
It is the place that I retreat from
Family does not warm my heart, it hardens it, creates a shell around it
I cannot be myself amongst my family, I am forever judged, frowned upon
Belittled
Humiliated
Always
Family is an alien concept to me because I am still waiting to find mine