Remnants of the Sixties

Remnants of the Sixties


I am a child of the sixties. I was born in 1950 but kids back then had no sense of the world around them until they were at least 10 years old. So I grew up in the sixties with all the remnants of the fifties. To me the remnants of the fifties were symbolized in the tv shows like Ozzie and Harriet and the Donna Reed show. Harriet and Donna didn’t “work”. They probably barely had a high school diploma. But that’s not to say they didn’t have careers. They did have careers and they were experts in their field. They were “Homemakers”. They took care of the house, the husband, the children, the neighbors, and the pets. They literally did everything…except have a life of their own. I wonder how many women cried in their sleep, took long baths to hide their frustration, or just went brain dead. But the world was and is a better for these poor souls. Houses were always neat, clean and organized. There wasn’t a need for Martha Stewart back then. People were not obese and unhealthy. They ate home cooked meals, from scratch, not a box or can. They ate together where they could bond, share, enjoy each other. Babies stayed at home except for the occasional trip to the park for the mommies only socialization. Children didn’t go to day care, there was no need for any. That’s what Moms were for. Men still strayed from time to time but it was taboo so not talked about. Women never strayed, where would they find the time? Sounds like a wonderful world, doesn’t it? From what I remember, it was. Evidently other people thought so too, because now these women have a title, “stay-at-home-Mom”

Now we are in the beginning of a new century. The Harriets and Donnas of the world are either very old now or gone on to their much deserved rewards. But now we have remnants of the sixties to deal with. I am a remnant of the sixties. The women of my childhood raised their daughters to be just like them. To have the same “career” as your mother was a girl of the sixties was the ultimate goal. Of course, there were mothers who worked “outside the home.” There were certain jobs that were acceptable. Jobs such as nursing, teaching, secretarial or at the bottom, waitress work. Pretty much still taking care of other people. My mom was a nurse, one of my friends’ mom was a secretary. Another friend had a mom who was a waitress. My other friends’ moms were still busy being Harriet or Donna. But all of us girls were pretty much raised the same way: get married, have babies, take care of husbands and babies. So we all did. And we were all damn good at taking care of these people we loved. We were successful homemakers. Of course we were children of the rebellious sixties so we may not have done everything in the prescribed order!

And now here I am 54 years later. I am still good at my career. I still take care of my husband; wash his clothes, cook his meals, wash his dishes, iron his shirts and clean his house. I am still there for my children whenever they should happen to need me for anything. I am now caring for grandchildren too. But I, like my old friends, am an expert at my job so it doesn’t take very much time. So now what. What’s next? I am not trained or educated for any other career. But if I could choose one, which would it be. My adult daughter asked me the other day, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I don’t know. I want to go back and do it all again. I want to teach little boys how to spell and wipe snotty noses. I want to teach little girls how to rock a baby doll and clean up vomit. What in God’s name were we trained for? Was it to be someone’s slave? Were we warped into believing we always had to be needed by someone? It’s not that I regret any of those years and work, I don’t. But I have worked my self out of a job so…what’s next?

I do know one thing that I want to do. Teach, advise, encourage young girls to get an education or some kind of training so that some day they wont be sitting at a computer rambling on about what to do with themselves. But at the same time I will tell them that there is not a more satisfying job in the whole world than being a wife and mother. Where else do you have a hand in creation? Young girls need to learn the fine art of compromise.

As for me, this child of the sixties, is stuck in this time warp. Why? Because I am now stereotyped. If I could find a job, who would do the ironing? If I could find a job, what if someone needed a babysitter? I keep thinking someday….but I don’t want that someday to come because that would mean my family was gone. Death is the only thing that can fire me from this job. I guess that’s what you call good job security!