Never Forgetting

He went back home for a woman. Isn’t that the way it always goes? He hadn’t thought of the place in a very long time. His life had moved on since then but when he got the call, when he found her again, he knew he had to go. To see her.

The plane touched down in Toronto at 8:40 in the morning and he retrieved his rental car, one of those little sport jobbies. The drive to Brockville was another four hours, so he stopped and got some snacks for the trip. Some Cheetos and Pepsi, enough to keep him awake anyway. The sky was cloudy and dark but as he hit the highway, they parted, allowing rays of sun to dart the earth in front of him. Maybe it was going to be okay. He turned on the radio to a classic rock station and as Bob Segar filled the cars interior his mind began to wonder.

It really had been thirteen years, hadn’t it? God, how time flies, as the saying goes. It seemed like yesterday when they were sitting in the park and it began to rain. They hid in a child’s playhouse, not before getting soaked in the process. It was there that he first kissed her, as the drops hammered down hard on the roof. He remembered her lip gloss and the way her tongue tasted. It was the kind of memory that never fades and every once in a while you can get a sense of it when you smell the perfume of another or a certain scent just happens to be in the air. They were friends before that but after that kiss, everything changed.

They became inseparable, as if they weren’t before, but it was different this time. When people saw them they knew that there were two people in love. Even if it was only young love, that still counts for something. They held hands, they laughed and they went to the movies. They did what young couples do, with no thought of the future, as if they would be together forever and in a way, they still were. He had never forgotten her and he hoped she had never forgotten him.

Three hours and thirty nine minutes later he crossed the town line. Now Entering Brockville, it said. His hands clutched the wheel tight and for a moment he had a second thought. Maybe he should turn back, maybe it would be better if he didn’t see her and let his life just go on as it had been. His heart raced and his head ached from too much sugar but in the end he decided to keep going. It would be for the best, he told himself. He pulled off the highway and turned left, the direction she was in.

He opted to take a few side streets, to see just how much the place had changed in thirteen years. Not much. The grocery store still stood and although the hardware store was gone, it had been replaced with something that looked as if it had been there just as long. The houses were all the same and no new developments had overcome the forest that was beyond the park to his right. Their park.

He pulled off to the side and shut off the engine. He stared at it for a moment. The slide, the teeter-totter and swing set were all the same, maybe with a bit more rust but that was alright. He had a bit of rust himself. He got out of the car and walked onto the gravel path, his hands in his pockets and his head down. Why had he come back here? What could he possibly gain from all this? Sometimes it isn’t about you, he thought, and he laughed as he reached the playhouse. Still standing. He climbed inside, forcing his oversized body though the opening before sitting cross legged, bending his head so as to not knock it on the roof. He closed his eyes and thought of her.

After that kiss they had returned to the park time and time again and sat in this very spot. They talked about their hopes and dreams, about a life together. Neither of them expecting it to be with anyone else. He held her hand and she caressed his. She would rest her head on his shoulder and cry when she was sad. He would lay his head on her lap when he was the same. If you’re expecting me to tell you they made love for the first time in that playhouse, you’re going to be disappointed. In fact, they never did make love. Not once. Theirs was the type of love that went way beyond all that teenage drama and pressure. They knew each other inside and out and if they thought it was going to last forever, what was the rush? As he sat there now and thought of her, he had no regrets.

He climbed out of the playhouse and looked up at the sky. The clouds were thicker now and threatened rain and sure enough, when he climbed back into the car it began to fall. He turned on his wipers and turned back the way he had come. There was a street just up ahead that would take him straight to her. He was ready now, his mind had wrapped around all this and he knew he had better hurry before he changed it again.

As he approached her he thought briefly as to why things didn’t last. It was really through no fault of their own. Sometimes life gets in the way and what you always want, isn’t what you always get. He had gone to one College and she had gone to another country. Moved away, permanently. They had cried together the night she left, as it was a full month before him. He held her in his arms and she held him in hers. The pain, he remembered, God the pain. He had still yet to experience anything like it in his life. It was as if his entire heart would explode right there. As much as he would have liked to believe that they would see each other again, he knew this would be the last time. That’s what made it so painful, but he told her anyway that it would be alright, that their love would last through anything. When she was gone, he learned to move on. And now, here they were again, about to be reconnected.

He stopped the car and stared at where she was. His heart began to flutter as he stepped out into the pouring rain. He didn’t care. His dress shoes walked through mud and his pants got soaked at the ends. He saw her there and he ran as hard as he could. He collapsed in front of her, his hair dangling in his face. He wrapped his arms around her stone and began to cry. I never stopped loving you, he said, and that is where he stayed for what seemed like an eternity.