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Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Comedy · #1383091
For the Quotation Inspiration Contest. A rather off-beat 'romantic - ?' farce.
They met because of human error.

The human being in question was a small boy, Lionel. How small? Age five. And he had just learnt to put his shoes on himself, laces and all, without Teacher's help.

And that's what led to the human error. He mistook Sam's left shoe for his own. And he put it on, when Teacher said, "Put your shoes back on!" after science class. The class was studying feet.

But I digress. It doesn't matter what feat the class was accomplishing. What matters is that Lionel had made a mistake while putting on his shoe.

So Lionel was wearing his own right shoe, and Sam's left shoe. Which means the right shoe was Beerock, the left was Sadida.

Never in the history of shoedom had this happened before. A Beerock and a Sadida on the same person's person. As you can imagine, due to the historic nature of the occasion, their adrenaline flowed. Adrenaline flowing can only mean one thing - chemistry. And chemistry translates to - yes - LOVE.

Love?

Love between a Beerock shoe and a Sadida shoe? *Shock*

Impossible.

But true.

The bell rang. School was out! Lionel ran down the path, causing Beerock and Sadida to thump-thump in time with each other. More adrenaline. More love. Running down the path, oh so smoothly, thump-thumping in time. Sole mates, if ever you did see any.

Meanwhile, Sam ran, too. Wearing one shoe. Waving the other in the air. Screaming, "Mommy, Mommy, Lionel won't give me my shoe back! This is his, that one's MINE!"

"Now, now, Darling, I'm sure Lionel made a mistake. Lionel, dear, please give Sam his shoe back."

Give Sam his shoe back?

Impossible.

Why? Why impossible?

Because Lionel had learnt to put ON his shoes. He didn't know how to take them OFF yet - let alone an unfamiliar brand of shoe. But how could he confess to that? Sam, after all, had been putting his shoes on and taking them off all by himself for two weeks now. Lionel knew, he'd been called 'Baby, baby' often enough, when he had asked for Teacher's help with these tasks.

"Won't!" Lionel screamed. And he ran to get away from Sam and his Mother.

But he ran off the smooth path. He ran into the flower bed that had been freshly watered. Now, Beerock and Sadida found they could not squelch-squelch in time. Squelching is extremely individual to each foot and its respective shoe. You simply cannot squelch in time with anybody, or any-shoe, else.

"Bee *Worry*," sighed Sadida.

"Don't be sad, Sad," sighed back Beerock. "We'll get on the smooth path again, soon, you'll see. Then we'll thump in time."

But they didn't. Because the little boy, Lionel, was trying to get away from screaming Sam and his Mother. And you don't get away from screaming classmates or their Mothers by staying on the smooth path.

Next, the boy ran on to fresh gravel. (What's fresh gravel? The opposite of stale gravel. Anyway, it doesn't matter. What matters is the rest of the story, because gravel, fresh or stale, doesn't allow thump-thumping, it only allows crunch-crunching. And no shoe can crunch-crunch in time with any other shoe, unless the wearer of both shoes has perfect control of his ankles, which five year olds like Lionel don't have.)

"Sad *Cry*," sighed Beerock.

"Don't be bee-side yourself, Bee," sighed back Sadida. "Love finds a way, whether the path is thumpy or squelchy or crunchy."

Suddenly, both shoes SCREECHED to a halt - together, in time. Lionel had stopped running rather abruptly.

Why? Why had Lionel and Beerock and Sadida stopped running so abruptly?

Because screaming Sam and his Mother had found a shortcut. The smooth path was a shortcut!

Impossible. Smooth paths are never shortcuts. Read any text book on the subject, it'll tell you. The smooth path is always the longest.

Unfortunately for Beerock and Sadida, this particular smooth path didn't know how to read yet, and hadn't read the required text books. So it was the shortest. Shorter than the squelchy path or the crunchy path.

Sam was still wearing one shoe, waving the other in the air. And now, the tongues of both those shoes began to wag.

"Shame *Confused*!" said the Sadida that Sam was wearing.

"Disgrace, dishonour, distress *Sick*," hissed the Beerock that Sam was waving.

"A Beerock? You thumped in time with a Beerock?" asked the Sadida that Sam was wearing.

"A Sadida? You thought a Sadida was your sole mate?" queried the Beerock that Sam was waving.

The Sadida and the Beerock on Lionel's feet looked embarrassed.

"Sorry, Sad, guess we've wounded their heels," said Beerock.

"You bet," said the Beerock that Sam was waving. "You should've healed our wounds, but instead ..."

"Instead?" retorted the Sadida that Sam was wearing. "Instead? There's no instead. I'm not going to have my heel wounded, I'll tell you that. That Sadida is going to toe the line from now on!"

"Sorry, Bee, but it's not to be," sighed Sadida, as Sam's Mother held Lionel's left ankle tightly and pulled Sam's shoe off Lionel's foot.

"Uh-uh *Blush* hello," said the Beerock Lionel was wearing, to the Beerock that Sam had been waving (which Lionel's foot was now being forced into by Lionel's own hands).

"Aw. All right *Smile* hello," replied the once-waved Beerock, forgiving the once-strayed one.

"And hello you *Bigsmile*," said the Sadida that Lionel had been wearing, to the Sadida that Sam was wearing, as Sam put it on all by himself, laces and all.

"Aw. All right. Hello *Wink*," replied the once-retorting Sadida, forgiving the once-consorting one.

Hold it. Hold everything. Hold the shoes, hold the *Blush*, hold the *Wink*, hold the *Smile*.

Something was wrong. Just as two pairs of footwear were about to find well-heeled bliss, something was wrong. And Sam's Mother screamed.

Wrong. It was Sam that did the screaming, not his Mother.

Well, this time, it was his Mother who screamed. She screamed at Lionel.

"Look what your great fat foot has done to my son's shoe! *Angry*," she yelled.

It was true. Sam's left Sadida was out of shape. Lionel's foot had stretched it. Perhaps, love had stretched it a bit, too. Anyway, it was now two millimeters bigger than Sam's right Sadida. And Sam's Mother was not going to stand that.

"I'm going to put my foot down, *Smirk*," she thought. "Let's see what we can get out of this."

We shall pass lightly over the next bit of the story, the bit where Sam's Mother forced Lionel's Mother to buy Sam a new pair of Sadidas. Bright and gleaming they were, too, very la-di-da, but frankly, they don't interest us.

What does interest us is that Sam's Sadidas were now Sam's-ex-Sadidas. Or rather, ex-Sam's-Sadidas. Or rather - well, you know what I mean. And Lionel, seeing them lying so sadly there in the shoe shop as Sam proudly wore his new pair out, took them home.

So two Beerocks (once-waved and once-strayed) and two Sadidas (once-retorting and once-consorting) found themselves together in Lionel's nursery. And once-waved and once-retorting were a bit suspicious of the other two, though they had said that they forgave them. After all, one never knows what is going to happen when the path is smooth ...

They had met by human error.

They were separated by human error.

The human being now in question was Lionel's younger brother, who, in error, threw his own shoes in the pond, and was given Sam's-ex-Sadidas in replacement. So the Sadidas lived in younger-brother's nursery, and the Beerocks lived in Lionel's nursery.

And much harmony there was, too.

Thanks to all the sole searching they'd been forced to do during the thump-squelch-crunch incident, both pairs of shoes now had eyelets only for the other of their own kind.

And both Beerock Lionel and his Sadida younger brother trod many a smooth path wearing them.


*********


WORD COUNT: All Words: 1336

WRITTEN FOR: "Quotation Inspiration: Official ContestOpen in new Window.

Quote of the Month: February 2008

The course of true love never did run smooth.
~William Shakespeare

(Perhaps slightly modified to its other version, the PATH of true love ...)
© Copyright 2008 THANKFUL SONALI Library Class! (mesonali at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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