These things I'll never know

What were you thinking that day you went away, what was the reasons you felt you could not stay, maybe it was the eight children or maybe it was dad, were you really that unhappy, miserable and sad. These things I’ll never know.

What were you thinking on that long journey home, did we cross your mind, did cry sigh or moan, maybe you felt like what you did was for the best, only you know the answer I myself can only guess. These things I’ll never know.

What were you thinking as the days passed you by, were you reacting in haste, did you ask yourself why, maybe you wanted to return but just didn’t know how, did you feel what’s done is done no turning back now. These things I’ll never know.

What were you thinking as the weeks turned into years, did you erase us from your mind, did you learn to hold back the tears, were we missed at all was there a void deep down inside, maybe you lost all your morals, had no sense of pride. These things I’ll never know.

What were you thinking when you had children by another man, maybe subconsciously you were trying to replace the ones you already had, was that enough to help you forget that we were yet alive, did you think that for some reason or another we would not survive. These things I’ll never know