Revealed

Scene I.
Anger rose up within me like a volcano about to explode. The anger quickly changed to tension and from tension to fear, the closer I got to Mom’s house. I made it up in my mind that tonight was the time to tell Mom the truth about me. I hoped Daddy either wasn’t home or out with friends. He never seemed good handling things like this. My mother wasn’t exactly the most liberal person in the world either, but I thought I’d have a better chance telling her the truth. It was always different talking to Mama. Almost like the conversation was telepathic…like she read my spirit in the same manner I could read a book. Certainly it didn’t matter what they thought, I was living with Aunt Lucy regardless…in my mind…..I would never come home again.

Alex: “Mom, it’s me!”
Elana: “…Well, I see you finally made it…” (She hugs him gingerly.)
Alex: “Sorry, Mom. I been kind of busy…”
Elena: “I’ve been busy too…I still make time for you.”
Alex: “Umm…I know…how’s Dad?”
Elana: “He’s asleep….you want me to wake him?”
Alex: “No…I’ll…”
Elana: “Why not? This will be the first time you’ve seen him in weeks! How do you think that makes him feel?”
Alex: “It’s just been so hard, with school…and…”
Elana: “And what? What’s going on with you?”
Alex: “Nothing…”
Elena: “Ever since you got home from Montreal….you’ve been acting real strange…”
Alex: “No, I…”
Elana: “Don’t tell me no! I am your mother..I know something is wrong…what happened Alexander?”
Alex: “Mom..you don’t understand….”
Elana: “Tell me, what is so hard to tell me? Better yet, why is it hard to say to me?”
After a quick inhale, then exhale….
Alex: “It’s just that….remember what happened with Cousin Lorenzo as a kid?”
Elana: “Oh God.” (She closes her eyes and lowers her head resting it on her hand.)
Alex: “Mom….Mom! I truly don’t blame you for…anything..”
Elana: “Alex, I didn’t know, darling…if I could turn around time, take it back….I would…..”
Alex: “At first, I was mad…because I felt that you weren’t there to protect me.”
Elana: “And you didn’t realize that I was a victim too. Your cousin broke my trust.”
Alex: “I know, I spent a long time keeping the secret, blaming myself….”
Elana: “Why? It wasn’t your fault…you were a scared little thing, he was experimenting…”
Alex: “Experimenting? Mom..do you…know? How bad…he made me feel?”
Elana: “I didn’t know….I couldn’t believe it when I found out. I wasn’t sure of what…happened that day. Something just felt wrong.”
Alex: “Mom, you have no idea the shame I felt….when..you came over to Aunt Lucy’s early….”
Elana: “I remember it like yesterday…”
Alex: “God…he made…me…feel….so….unclean….nasty….”
Elana: “You could have told..me…then…”
Alex: “Told you what? Even I didn’t want to admit it!”
Elana: “Admit to abuse? It wasn’t your fault!”
Alex: “No, that your little boy was a gay sex toy!”
Elana: “Alex?”
Alex: “I’m sorry Mom. I hate to tell you….but he tore me so bad, my mind has blocked out most of it! For years, I thought sometimes I was crazy! Like I just made it up in my mind…”
Elana: “But it’s over now!”
Alex: “No Mommy…it’s not over! I still feel trapped in that little boy body…”
Elana: “But now look at you, handsome, strong..smart.”
Alex: “Mom, you see that! Do you want to know what I see? A boy made to wash his own bloody underwear…”
Elana: “Jesus…I wish I could take the pain from you…”
Alex: “But you can’t…no one can!”
Elana: “Ali, you know I have never dealt with anything like that….before…”
Alex: “I know, in the Caribbean, these kind of things…don’t happen, right?”
Elana: “Why you mocking me? That is my experience…”
Alex: “My experience is….. that abuse happens anywhere…that day you came, I wasn’t sure of what would happen to me..or Lorenzo.”
Elana: “Sure? Sure of what? He should have went to jail! I wanted to make sure he would never do that to my son again….”
Alex: “Mom, damage is already been done.”
Elana: “Darling, I want you to heal..to become a whole young man….”
Alex: “Are you saying I’m not whole?”
Elana: “Obviously, if you are coming to me about the past….”
Alex: “That’s because you made me feel like I’m the only kid this has ever happened to…that bothered me!”
Elana: “I tried to take you to counseling….”
Alex: “Mommy, there are some things that need counseling and other things that don’t need…counseling…because….there is nothing wrong.”
Elana: “What are you meaning by that statement?”
Alex: “I think you know…..Lorenzo was wrong for what he did to me ….”
Elana: “Alex….”
Alex: “But, through the pain, I know he had a problem, not me…”
Elana: “I didn’t make you talk about it…because it hurt me to see the pain in your eyes…”
Alex: “No one wants admit their nephew raped their son….”
Elana: “I’m here for you. I love you. Alex, what can I do? How can I make it better?”
Alex: “God, Mom…I wish you could…..I wish you could.”
Elana: “Please Alex, I know your Dad would love to see you.”
Alex: “I don’t know, Mom. I know he’s still mad. I really don’t want to have him fuss at me now. I just need to get out of here….”
Elana: “To stay with Lucy?”
Alex: “Yes.”
Elana: “Staying with us that bad?”
Silence.
Elana: “What am I? Tell me boy! What am I?”
Alex: “My mother.”
Elana: “That’s right. I’m very angry about what happened to you…but you’re stronger than this….”
Alex: “Stronger? What are you saying? I’m weak because this still affects me? Or let me guess….I’m sick!”
Elana: “No, I just know…this thing….. you’re dealing with…….is not you….”
Alex: “Oh that’s where you’re wrong! This is me! You can’t even say it! Can you Mom?”
Elana: “What do you want me to say?”
Alex: “That I’m okay….that I’m your son. Say that you still love me…”
Elana: “Alexander, you are always going to be a part of me, but I’m always going to be a part of you…remember that.”
Alex: “It’s funny, that’s how I feel about you at the moment…”a part” from you…”
Elana: “Alex!”
Alex stands up and turns away.
Alex: “I’m sorry Mom, but you know I can’t keep the truth locked up in me anymore..”
Elana: “What truth is that now?”
Alex: “I think you know…the truth! (Pause.) I’m gay….ok Mom?… I’m gay!”
Alex leaves his Mom stunned and speechless with teary eyes and clenched fists.
Scene Ends.