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Rated: 18+ · Column · Experience · #1360544
Story of how one man deals with negativity involving his persnal and professional life. .
Tell 'Em Why Ya Mad

by; Morsey3

Have you ever been in a situation whether it be in your professional or personal life that you just want to just yell "What the fuck"? Well, thats what I want to do and say right now.

I'm pissed the hell off right now. I have been working at my current job for over seven years. Oh, by the way I am a Senior Behavioral Therapist that works with developmentally delayed adolescent boys in a group home. See, I feel that I definatley put my time in to move up the ranks. But for some reason the director of the program sees differently.

Now the story starts off in late March early April of '06. It was decided by upper management that another group home was going to open. Along with looking for staff to work at the house they were looking for someone to run the house. Thats where I come into the picture. I was looking for a change professionally. Not necessarily leaving my job all together, but something more challenging other than what I was already doing at the current time. And what other position is more challenging than taking on the role of leader? So I threw my name in the pot and hopped for something positive out of it.

The director of the program Gary granted me an interview. Along with interviewing with Gary I had to interview with Garys boss Arthur Mercurio and three other superivosrs Tanya who is my direct supervior, Maura, and Melanie who both oversee the Heritage House. I was very confident that I was going to get the role as Supervisor at the the new house, Hill House.

Well it took about three weeks for Gary to make a decision and suprisingly I didn't get the position. I was upset about not getting that advancement in my career. But I understood why. See, the person who got it over me, Kelly who prior to getting the new role was a staff at the Greenwich House was a much better fit than I was for the population of kids that were going to be living at that house. The group of kids that were being placeed were a lot more lower functioning and seeing where Greenwich House was also known as a lower functioning house and Kelly had that experience I understood Gary's decision. Another thing that he mentioned to me was that he felt that if a spot opened up at the Rumford House that I would be a much better fit there.

Although I didn't get the position something positive did come out of this. Gary sat down with me and mentioned that my current supervisor Tanya who by this time was seven months pregnant was going on maternity leave. He asked me since I wanted to take more a leadership role would I be interested in taking on some of her responsibilities while she was on leave. I agreed. For four months my title was Shift Coordinator. I received positive feedback not only from my peers who worked with the house but people from other departments.

Tanya eventually came back early September, but to me and my co-workers suprise it was brought to our attention that she will be resigning from her current role as supervisor and that her postion will be posted for those interested to apply. I took advantage of that in a heartbeat. As soon as I saw the position posted on the work website I applied. But it did come with hesitation. See I forgot to metion to you that Robin, my mother works at the same location as I do. She has been apart of Bradley for over 16 years and she herself was once a supervisor at one time. She is an asset to the program in which we work. If I should get the position she would have to go to another house due to the nepotism policy my job enforces. Her and I would get into heated arguements over this. She said on several occassions that if I would get the position she would not leave the house where we both work. With a lot of thinking I finally applied for the postion. I even told my mother and she questioned me after her and I discussed the matter. I told her that I had to do this for myself and that I was ready for a change. Even though she was upset she eventually got over it and accepted that I was ready to advance my career.

Gary once again granted me an interview. Overall, the interview went well. He took two months to make a decision. It was Thursday December 6, 2007 that I found out that once again I did get the supervisors position. Gary once again brought me behind closed doors and explained his reasoning. This time I didn't accept the reason behind him not giving me the position. He first said that he felt that I was too close to some of the people that I currrently work with. The second thing he said is that he doesn't feel that I although I am working on being assertive I could be a little more assertive due to when I was Shift Coordinator he felt that there were some things that I could've addressed with m fellow co-workers. And lastly the thing that really pissed me off was that he felt that with me being "a nice guy" that some of my peers who I currently work with would mistake that kindness for weakness. WHAT THE FUCK!

His reasonings are a bunch of bullshit. Let me tell you that since the house opened in '02 the house has had the lowest turnover ration amongst all the other three houses including the newer Hill House. Of course you are going to have a bond with the people you work with. But we as professionals know how to sent boundaries when it comes to be personal and professional. Obviously he doesn't see it that way.

As for being more assertive, yes I do admit that is one thing that I have and still at times struggle with in my professioanl life and personal life. But there is always room for improvement andI have been working on it. But the thing that gets me is that Gary who is the director of the residential program and social worker to several of the residents within Rumford House and shows up once to twice a month is saying something about me being assertive. Oh, I forgot to mention to you that Monday-Thursday I am typically by myself at the house with a resident who refuses to get out of the bed and no other staff there. So my question to Gary is who am I being assertive with if there is nobody there? The only time I am working with a group of people is if I should get mandated to work the second shift or my weekends on. Two shifts that Gary is not around. Especially on the weekends. He doesn't see that on my weekends that I am the go to person for my peers and the residents. He doesn't see that I coordinate whats going on for the weekend that I work.

Another thing that comes to mind about this assertive thing is that when I applied for the Hill House position and I had the interview with the three supervisor, Tanya, Mel, and Maura the interview was wrapping up and they asked me if I had any questions. I did. I asked them what was the hardest thing about being a supervisor. They all gave their individual answers, but out of the three Mels answer stayed with me to this day. She said what she found hard was that if she had to confront an employee about a certain matter that it would take her a while to go to that person and she would seek out her resources like Gary or Tanya and see whats the best way to approach that person. See where I'm going with this. Where is the assertiveness there? I guess Gary doesn't see that.

The story gets more interesting. About a week after I found out that I didn't get the supervisors position at the Rumford House I got another shock that made me even more upset about the decision Gary had made. I received a call from one of my co-workers Frank. He asked me if I received the email that Gary sent about the new supervisor of the house. To my surprise and the rest of the whole residential staff Mike was named the new supervisor. What's the problem with Mike you ask? Well not only was Mike a supervisor at another house at one point who eventually stepped down for certain reasons, he is also Tanyas husband. Yes, Tanya, the now former Supervisor of the Rumford House.

I still have some resentment towards my job and the decision that Gary has made. I still don't agree with it, but I have to deal with it for the time being. Like I told all of my co-workers who are upset about the situation, it is what it is.
© Copyright 2007 Morsey3 (morsey at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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